Burn

Flashback: "I love you, my sweet girl. Forever and always." My eyes welled with tears as I held on to my father's hand, his once lively green eyes now a dull, tired colour. "Dad. You can't go. I still need you." My voice broke, the tears I've been trying to hold back now dripping down my face. "I'm sorry, bumble bee. I've held on as long as I can, but I'm tired now. Just remember that I always love you." He whispered, struggling to raise a shaky pale hand to wipe the tears from my face. I took in a deep breath, pressing my lips to his cold skin, knowing that this would be the last time I see him or talk to him. "I love you, dad." He gave me a weak smile, using the last of his energy to squeeze my hand, before his eyes closed and his breathing slowed down. ~•~ I was hanging on by a thread. It was the day of my father's funeral and I was a complete mess. I tried so hard to be strong, but I couldn't. My world had crashed and burned and I didn't know what to do. There was a knock on my bedroom door, and it opened revealing my best friend, Blake. He gave me a weak smile, walking further into the room, until he stopped right in front of me. "How are you feeling, Bri?" He asked softly, kneeling in front of me. I couldn't find the right words to say, so I just shook my head, making him sigh. I haven't stopped crying since my father died a week ago, and today was no different. "Everything is going to be alright, love. We just have to get through today. One day at a time, okay?" He murmured, and I nodded, wiping the tears from my face. "Let's get you ready." He stood, pulling me up from the bed, gently pushing me into the bathroom. In a daze, I took a shower, walking back out into the bedroom in my robe when I was done. Blake came out of my closet, a black dress and heels in hand. "Get dressed, Bri. I'll be right outside, okay?" He waited for my nod of confirmation, before he left the room, quietly closing the door behind him. With my body on autopilot, I put on my clothes, stepping into the bathroom and pulling my hair up into a ponytail. I didn't even bother looking in the mirror, knowing that I'd only see the tear tracks and red blotches on my face. I met Blake outside, and he entwined my hand with his, before leading me down the stairs. I glanced into the living room, and I shook my head in disgust as I saw my mother and her latest conquest slumped over on the couch, bottles of booze surrounding them. She couldn't even wait a f*****g week before moving on. Blake tugged on my hand, and led me out of the house. "Not today, Bri." He said softly. My jaw clenched, and I nodded. He opened the door to the car for me, and I slid in, putting on my seatbelt. He got in on the driver's side, and he grabbed my hand, squeezing it in comfort. Time to go bury my father. ~•~ Blake held me close to him, rubbing my back as they lowered the casket into the ground. I buried my face into his chest and sobbed.  My mother didn't even bother showing up to the funeral, and I'm not even surprised. I stood there with Blake until every last person left, giving me their condolences as they did. "Can I have a minute alone, please?" I whispered, and Blake nodded. "Of course, love. I'll be by the car when you're ready to leave." He kissed the top of my head, before walking away. I kneeled in front of the fresh grave, placing the bouquet of roses that I had in my hand on top of it. "I miss you, dad.... So much. Why did you have to go?" I whispered, feeling the fresh tears fall freely once again. I took a deep, shaky breath, before standing. "I love you dad. Until we meet again." I murmured, standing there for a few moments before walking away. I climbed into the car, where Blake was waiting, and he sat there quietly, waiting for me to say something. "Take me to the lawyer's office." I said, staring out the window. "I don't think that's a good idea, Bri. It's been a long day, and-." "Blake. Take me to the lawyer's office, or I'll find my way by myself." My voice had an edge to it, and I sighed. "I'm sorry. It's just that, I don't want to be home right now, especially not around my mom. I need something to distract myself with, and I want to hear what the lawyer has to say." I said quietly. "Alright, if that's what you want." He said softly. The ride to the lawyer's office was a short one, and Blake parked the car, turning to me. "Do you want me to come up with you?" He asked, and I nodded. "Yes please."  We both got out of the car, and made our way into the building, taking the elevator up to the twenty fifth floor where the office was. "Oh! Ms. DeLuca, we weren't expecting you today." The secretary greeted. "Yes, I know. Is Mr. Davis in?" I asked. "Yes, he is... I just wanted to give you my condolences about your father. It was really sad to hear." Her look of pity irritated me, but I pushed it down, giving her a tight smile. "Yes, it was." I muttered, feeling Blake grab my hand. She excused herself, going into Mr. Davis' office, before she came back out. "You can go in." She said, taking her seat. "I'll wait here for you, alright?" Blake murmured, pushing back a lock of hair that escaped my ponytail. "No. I want you with me, please." I said in a small voice, and he nodded. I pulled him into the office with me, and Mr. Davis looked up from his documents with a smile. "Brianna. How are you doing?" He asked, standing. "Could be better." I said softly, and he nodded. "Yes, I understand. I'm sorry for your loss." He said. "I actually didn't expect you to be here, considering what today is." He continued. "Yes I know, but I needed a distraction. So I decided to come here." I said, taking a seat in front of his desk.  Blake stood behind me, his hands resting on my shoulders. "Well, I would've rather your mother be here with you for the reading of the will, but I don't see any harm in it being you alone." I bristled at the mention of my mother, sure that my disgust could be seen clearly on my face. Mr. Davis pulled a file out of his file cabinet, setting it on his desk. "When your father's health started declining, he drafted his will. After the cancer started spreading, and he knew it was only going to get worse, he made some adjustments. I'm sure you've seen or heard about your mother's.... Extracurricular activities. Your father had also found out about it, the week before he died actually, and he made some extra changes." He opened the file, looking down at it. "He left you as beneficiary to all his assets." Mr. Davis looked up at me, and I felt my world stop for a moment. What? "Nothing was left in your mother's name. It's all yours. However, the company has been left in the hands of one of his most trusted business partners, until you finish college of course. He had also set a limit in the amount of money I can give you every month until you  reach 25. After you're finished college, you're required to work under the supervision of his business partner for two years before you can take over. After finding out what your mother had been doing behind his back, he left nothing for her, but I leave it completely up to you if you want to let her have anything." My mouth was still gaped open,and I felt Blake tap my jaw, making me close it. Holy s**t. "I understand that it's a lot to take in, but I need to remind you that your father only had your best interest at heart. Everything he did, he did for you. Now, he wanted me to give you this after he passed. He told me not to open it, so I don't know what is inside." Mr. Davis handed me a bulky envelope, and I clutched it to me tightly. "I'm truly sorry for your loss, Brianna. Your father was an exceptional man and one of the best clients I've ever had. He'll be dearly missed." He said softly, and I felt the tears pool in my eyes once again. "Thank you." I whispered and he nodded. We left the office, the envelope clutched tightly to me. Neither Blake nor I said a word as we left the building and got into the car. Blake took me home, and reluctantly left, only leaving after I promised to call him whenever I needed him. I walked through the big, quiet house, and peeked  into the living room, seeing it empty. I walked into the kitchen, and held back a sigh when I saw my mother there, smoking a blunt with a glass of red wine in her hand. She didn't say a word to me, and I couldn't help the flood of anger I felt in my veins. "You're really a sorry excuse for a human being." I sneered, taking a bottle of water out of the fridge. "Excuse me?" "Did I stutter? I'm sure I didn't." I muttered. "You have no right to talk to me like that. I'm your mother." She said indignantly. I laughed loudly, pinning her with a glare that made her shrink back. "That has to be the joke of the f*****g century, because for the past four years, you were acting more like a w***e instead of a mother." She gasped in outrage, her hand swinging back to slap me across the face, I grabbed her wrist, squeezing tightly. "You don't want to do that, mother. You may have been able to push me around and do whatever you wanted when I was younger, but I'm older and I can defend myself now." I spat, letting go of her hand. "You didn't even have the decency to show up to the funeral of the man you were married to for 23 years." I shook my head, looking away from her. I couldn't even look at her anymore. "You don't understand. It was hard for me to watch the love of my life wilt away right before my eyes." She whispered. "You think I don't understand? He was my f*****g father! I had to sit there and watch the man who I once thought was Superman, grow weaker and tired each day. I had to watch as he struggled just to do everyday tasks. I had to watch as he cried because he didn't know what to do or how to feel. I had to sit there and feed him every day, just because he couldn't move his hands properly to feed himself. WHERE THE f**k WERE YOU?" I screamed the last part, tears falling down my face. "Where were you when we needed you?" I whispered. She didn't answer me, not that I expected her to. "I'm done. Until you can own up to everything you did and give me a meaningful apology, I don't want you around me. By tomorrow morning, I'll be gone. I hope the fast life you decided to chase while your husband was sick and on his death bed, was worth it. Now you lost both of us." I began to walk away, but I stopped and turned to her, a cruel smile twisted on my lips. "If you think dad wasn't aware of everything you were doing, you're wrong. He found out everything the week before he died, and he left nothing for you. It all goes to me. Bet you regret doing what you did now, huh?" I watched her skin pale, and her mouth dropped open. Before she could say anything, I walked away.  Let her stew on that. I made my way up to my room, closing and locking the door. I kicked off my heels, pulling my hair out of the ponytail that it was in, as I felt a strong headache coming on from all the crying that I did. I sat in the armchair in my room, and I opened the envelope Mr. Davis gave to me. Inside was a jewelry box, a key card, a wad of cash and a tape recorder. I took out the tape recorder and pressed play. "Brianna, my precious daughter: If you're hearing this, it means that I'm gone. I would've made a video, but I didn't want you to remember me in the condition that I was in. I'm sure by now that you've talked to Charles, and he's filled you in on everything that was in my will. But before I get into all of that, I just wanted to apologize. I'm sorry that I couldn't be the father you wanted me to be, or needed to me to be. I'm sorry that you had to sit there and watch my health get worse and worse. If it was up to me, I wouldn't have even told you or let you see me that way because I didn't want your last memory of me to be in a hospital bed, not being able to even move properly. I want you to know that I love you with all of my heart, bumble bee. You were the best thing that ever came out of my marriage with your mother. This is why I chose to leave everything to you. I'm sure you know about your mother's indiscretions, and you probably had your reasons for not saying anything. I don't hold that against you. I'm actually glad you were not the one to tell me because I think it would've hurt more hearing it from you. But, I'm not going to get into that. I know things are going to be difficult now that I'm gone, bumble bee. But I need you to push through for me. I want you to finish college, and graduate. Then I want you to take over my company and run it to the best of your ability. This is why I've left my company in the hands of  my most trusted business partner, and one of my closest friends,  Egor Markov. There is no one else I would trust more to train you and lead you in the right direction with this company. Another thing; this is part of my wish for you. I've placed a keycard in the envelope for the penthouse at the top of my apartment building in the city. I don't want you to live with your mother anymore. I have a few choice words for her, but I've put that into a separate recording because I don't want you to hear what I have to say to her, and about her. But I want you far away from that woman, so that you can focus on school and be the amazing and exceptional young woman that I know you can be. All of the bills for the penthouse is being taken care of by Charles, and I've set your allowance for the month at $25,000. I think this is a reasonable amount, but if it's not for some reason, Charles will give you the extra that you need for that month. However, that doesn't mean that you can spend the money wildly. If you ever need extra money, there must be a valid reason. I haven't grown you up to be careless with money though, so I don't have any worries. I love you bumble bee, and I know you'll miss me. But just know that I'll always live in your heart. This is my goodbye to you. I know that it will take a while, but you'll be fine, and I know that you will make me proud. I'll see you in the next life, sweetheart." By the end of the recording, I was sobbing loudly, and I couldn't seem to stop. My heart felt like it was shattered, and I could barely breathe. Hearing him say goodbye to me like that, really broke something in me. It really drove the point home that he was gone, and he was never coming back. I'd never get to talk to him again or see him again, or tell him that I loved him.  I took a deep breath, trying to get my breathing under control, before I opened the jewelry box that was in the envelope. A bittersweet smile tugged at my lips as I pulled out the diamond encrusted Cuban link chain my father always used to wear. This thing is older than me. I remember reaching up to play with it when I was little and he had me on his lap. There was another necklace inside, but there was a Lockett attached to it, and I opened it. There was one picture of me when I was a toddler, sitting on my dad's shoulders with a huge smile on my face as I tugged on his hair. On the other side, there was a picture of him and I from my 16th birthday four years ago, before our lives were turned upside down with his illness.  All the money in the world and we still couldn't save him. The tears dripped onto necklace in my hand, and I wished I could stop them. But the pain in my heart was too much to bear. I shook my head, trying to get rid of my gloomy thoughts, and I got up, turning on some music. I busted myself with packing all my clothes and items, placing what I wear everyday in two suitcases, and placing the rest in boxes which I got from one of the many storage closets in the house.  I called a moving company to come pick up the rest of my things first thing in the morning. After making sure that my room was completely empty, I took a shower to wash the day off of me, and got ready for bed. It was only 8:30 PM, but I was mentally and physically drained. I took two pills to help me sleep, before I fell into bed. Tomorrow I start a new life without any parents, and I don't know how I'm going to survive it without my dad.