Pain Lingering In Heart
1605 Words
Although I did not know since when this pain took root in my chest, one thing I knew for sure was that it hurt so much, and I desperately wanted to rid it from my mind—or perhaps, from my life.
I grew up with the belief that anything I wanted I could get, no matter how tough it was. My parents never said no to me—except for my own dreams. I had been trained and prepared altogether just to be Adrian's 'bride,' solely for the well-being and bringing up the pride of the Hawthorn family.
However, Adrian's rejection shattered my pride, destroying all the efforts I had carefully prepared since my childhood until now. He heartlessly decided to break off this contractual marriage without thinking about the consequences for me and my family.
It did not mean I loved Adrian as a woman.
I did not believe in love.
That's true.
For me, love is a false concept created by naive creatures like humans to explain the complicated relationship between two people and make them think they love each other when they are only using each other.
I took advantage of Adrian to become a Luna and secure my family's position within the alliance, while Adrian was supposed to take advantage of me with my ability and presence to strengthen our alliance—instead of bringing some random human girl from who knows where and claiming that he loves her. What did he really need from that human girl?
I did not understand at all. Was I truly useless to Adrian... or to the alliance?
Or were all the efforts I made not enough for him?
"Haaaah..." I sighed deeply while staring at the abandoned castle ceiling which was filled with spiderwebs and some small spider families up there. They were busy expanding their webs to catch more insects for food supplies during the winter—oh, right, winter is approaching soon. Surely people in the alliance were also busy preparing food to survive the winter season.
I knew I should not be here right now. I should be home and helping them all.
I shifted my body to the side and wincing a bit from the lingering pain in my back. I hugged the warm wool blanket tightly, then covered myself up to my chin.
"Besides, why bother going home? They probably don't want to see an ex Luna like me. I'd be labeled as someone with no shame for returning to the place where I was embarrassed and humiliated in public."
Yeah, I guess I could be a bit stubborn and care too much about my pride and what others think. I did not want my status to fall apart, and I did not want their gazes turned mocking me. That was why I acted like a coward, running away with no intention of ever coming back again to home.
My high pride was the main reason for me to return. Plus, Adrian probably never wanted me back either. He was busy preparing for his engagement party with Grace or whoever she was.
Well... why should I care about their personal lives?
I'd better think about—
Click.
The door opened, that man must be back now. I should not look like I was already awake. I had to quickly pretend to sleep—
"No need to pretend to be sleeping."
The man's cold voice made me stop in the middle of the movement, and I slowly turned to look at him. He was wearing different clothes from the first time I saw him, where he always wore strange all-black clothes, which matched his messy black hair and made him look like some sort of–death angel.
However, this time, the man was wearing more casual clothes–a loose gray shirt and oversized black pants that seemed too big for him, but somehow suited him perfectly.
He was wearing human clothes, where those clothes could only be found in the human world.
It was clear he was not a human, looking from the supernatural aura that surrounded him, and also his immaculate strength when he killed those Hyenas made it more certain that he was one of us, a supernatural being who was living alongside humans.
"Where are you from?" I asked him, half curious, half wanting to lighten up the awkward mood between us.
Even though he was a stranger, he had still saved my life last night.
"Are you from the human world?"
Between the human world and the world of supernatural beings like us, there was a protective mist that acted as a barrier. Humans could not penetrate it without the help of supernatural beings because the protective mist has a misleading effect, causing humans to wander in the same place and not be able to return to both worlds.
"That's none of your business,” he replied short and ignored me while arranging some beer bottles on the shelf near the door. So, he drank alcohol too? Huh. Really could not be trusted.
Then I tried to sit up because I had been lying down for too long, and my head started hurting.
“Ouch–” I groaned softly while holding my lower back, near the wound from the Hyena's claws that injured me last night.
My wound seemed quite deep.
However, my regeneration was unusually slow today.
Was it because I had not been recharging my vitality under the moonlight for a long time? Since my childhood, my mother always said I should never forget to meditate when the moon appears because the main source of werewolf regeneration power is the moonlight... and humans too.
Yep, it has been a long time since I last killed a human, precisely when my she-wolf awakened. Since then, I had never hunted humans to increase my strength and only relied on the moonlight.
My strength started to weaken because I have not had time to meditate because I was busy with my coronation party–which failed, too.
Damn Adrian, I'll never forgive you for the rest of my life.
"Here, use this," the man said again, handing me a piece of cloth and some other medicines.
"What's this?" I asked, though I already knew the answer. What I really wanted to ask was why a stranger like him would care so much about me and bring me stuff like this?
Wait a moment, could it be?
I cleared my throat before speaking again, staring into the man's jade green eyes.
"Wait, do you … like me? That's why you're doing all this?"
"Huh?" He raised an eyebrow with a confused look, as if not believing what I had just said.
I squinted. "First of all, thank you for your help. However, you don't have to go through all this trouble. I know I might be charming enough for every guy to want to propose to me, but I apologize to you because I won't marry anyone except an Alpha candidate–"
"Pffft–" The man then chuckled, more like a mocking laugh, making me furrow my eyebrows in annoyance.
"You just laughed, didn't you?"
Without warning, he suddenly stepped forward and leaned his body toward me. He placed both of his hands on the bed and stared at me closely, tilting his head slightly. "Wow, you're quite confident, ex-Luna."
"H-huh?"
My eyes widened, how could he know?
He then snorted softly, more in a mocking tone. His green pupils stared at me intensely, as if sinking into my eyes. "I thought after being dumped by your own fiancé in public, you would learn something, but it seems like arrogance has deeply rooted in your self-esteem to the point where you think I like you? You're pretty bold, huh?"
My face flushed with embarrassment.
Damn it. He clearly knew who I was.
Without waiting any longer, I immediately pushed his shoulder and looked at him with an annoyed look. "If you already know, then just don't pretend to give me medicine or your little silly affection when you already know who I am."
He stepped back, laughing again as if I was a little dumb kid he fooled while playing with the bandage in his hand. I turned my face away, not wanting to look at his face that was mocking me.
"Catch this," the man said, tossing the bandage in his hand, and I was surprised, then caught it with both hands. Then he walked out, raising one of his hands.
"Fix your wounds, then I'll throw you back home. I don't want intruders wandering in my house any longer," he said while walking away.
"W-wait, where are you going? Hey!" He did not answer my question and just left. I pouted in annoyance, how could someone be so annoying? Even Adrian's stubbornness paled compared to this man.
I sighed softly, returning to my senses. Nevertheless, he was right, I had to go back soon and stop my cowardly act.
I lifted the top of my dress, which was kept separate from my skirt, and grimaced at the deep wound on my lower back. There were traces of ointment there—wait, did he give me an ointment for my wound too?
As I recalled, he was also the one who saved me from the Hyenas. And also my two kidnappers. And now he gave me medicine. Or was he not as bad as I thought?
I quickly erased my foolish thoughts and unwrapped the bandage.
"Sigh, never mind. I have to wrap this wound up quickly and go back home."
- Writer
