Egan
I shouldn’t have lashed out at Alma.
I was angry, frustrated.
However, I wasn’t angry at her, I was fully aware that none of this was her fault. She was innocent and lost in this chaos of blood and fire. She deserved better, a simpler and calmer life in which the whole destiny of our species wouldn’t lay on her back, in which her life wouldn’t be endangered.
She deserved peace and someone who could love her.
I didn’t want to say those words to her, to make her feel rejected or unworthy. But when she said that she didn’t want to be carrying my child, it opened a wound in an unknown part of my soul. Why did her not wanting me bothered me so much? Why did it hurt this deeply?
I didn’t want her, or anyone for the matter. Between maintaining my cover among the humans, p
