To say I was disappointed when Lynda steered her hovercart away from the cookie and snack cake aisle would be a tremendous understatement.
There I sat, looking fabulous, dreaming of the love of lips and teeth and tongue I craved above all else...and Lynda didn’t even come down my aisle. Via Store’s buyspy, I watched as she pushed on by, pausing at an endcap display to listen to cereal boxes calling out to her before she turned down the next aisle and kept going.
For an instant, I panicked, fearing I had missed my chance at meeting the woman of my dreams. My baked-in mind (consisting of a matrix of precision-engineered and digestible protein molecules) was thrown into a state of confusion.
Then, I pulled myself together and pinged Store, determined not to give up so easily. From the
