THE SIGMA'S MATE

CHAPTER 4 - NEW KINDS OF BONDS

It feels nice to be tucked under the protection of my brother from Lucas Lake back to Halmara Palace. Even Belavina smiles warmly and repeatedly asks how I am feeling. This is despite her more recent animosity. I am no fool, I know exactly what turned her cold towards me. They seem to be getting along much better now. Constantly sharing looks and secret messages between each other that nobody else is privy to. I find my throat constricting and my eyes watering every time I look at her. Her hazel eyes, olive skin and dark auburn hair are a constant reminder of my fated mate that will not have me. Unlike Lazarus, I do not have the power nor desire to enforce my affections on him. I attempt to return her smiles and ease their concerns but I reckon I fail miserably. That bubbly, happy girl died along with Callan. Along with the realization that it doesn't matter who you are or what place you have in society, if you cannot protect yourself, then you will die. We are not invincible. We might like to play at being gods, dictating the laws in which common people live, choosing who lives and dies, choosing who to bestow our blessings on. But I was small and helpless and pathetic when that man threw Wolfsbane at me - when he screamed in my face and called me scum.

Royal scum.

Those words seem to keep repeating themselves. Eating away at the person I thought myself to be. How can someone hate us so much, when they do not know us individually? Have we really treated our lowborns so badly that they would perceive us as monsters?

Royal scum.

There is no difference in the way I hurt and suffer from that of other people. I was going to die sooner or later and I didn't want to. The only reason I am still here today is because I am the Authority's Princess. Because my brother cares enough to come save me. The armored vehicle comes to a slow stop. I peek out the tinted bulletproof windows for an indication of what is going on.

"We are going to stop now sister, so that we may rest and feed ourselves. Is that agreeable?" Lazarus asks, a hint of concern lacing his authoritative voice.

I give him a tight smile, "Very."

He seems pleased with my answer and moves to exit the long, wheelbase vehicle. Belavina's hand suddenly sits on my thigh pausing my intention to follow as Lazarus steps out. I meet her hazel, honey gaze. The sight is like fire with that rich colour blazing.

"The world does not break you. You do when you give up." She says.

Her words surprise me. I did not peg her for someone who would usually offer encouraging words. I wonder if she has ever needed words of encouragement. She seems so strong, so willing to take anything that the world throws at her. I watch as she follows after Lazarus and I bring up the rear. It's a large accommodation, easily able to fit the entirety of the entourage escorting the royals. The Revenge Sisters are here as well as a large number of the Authority members. Everyone appears thrilled about the stop. Their faces look worn despite the fact that most of the entourage are young adults, and there's a wariness that seems to make everyone drag their feet. There's no special dinner or gathering. Everyone retires almost as soon as we arrive. I follow Lazarus and Belavina to our rooms, saying my good nights to the royal couple as soon as Belavina indicates which one is mine. She tells me that food shall be delivered shortly before wishing me a pleasant night. This should be my job. To make sure everyone is accounted for and comfortable, but I cannot seem to find it in me to care right now. I am bone deep tired too. I attend to my comfort, showering and washing my long wavy hair. I find a white robe and decide to sleep in it so that my torn dress can dry properly.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

I almost growl at whoever it is to go away when I remember the food. On cue my stomach announces it's desire to be fed. I open the door reluctantly. I'm surprised when I do not find a servant. Jayden with his dark brown hair and golden brown eyes stands smiling with two trays in his hands. The smell of rich vegetables soup and fresh bread and cheese has my mouth watering

"Thanks." I beam, reaching for one eagerly.

He lifts the tray I reach for higher, a smirk appearing on his face. I narrow my eyes in warning.

"Allow me." He insists, waltzing through the open door and plopping himself into one of the chairs positioned next to a small coffee table.

I sigh before shutting the door and taking the remaining seat. He places the trays down on the glass table supported by a metal frame and legs, but doesn't move to begin eating. I grit my teeth, wishing desperately that I could throw good manners out the window. I lift my eyes from the tempting food to give him a tight smile.

"Would you like to say something?" I inquire sweetly.

"You may eat first." He replies.

I raise an dark eyebrow, thick and perfectly arched, "I would rather hear it now before my meal makes me sluggish and eager for bed. What is the matter?"

Jayden swallows nervously before rising to his feet so that he towers above my head to stand before me. Now this is really getting strange. Stranger still when he bends a knee to kneel.

I'm visibly confused, "Jayden what are you…"

"I have disappointed myself and my future king. I was tasked with your protection and I have shown myself incompetent."

"I have already told you that it's alright."

His eyes seem to fill with a determination that I have seldom seen before, "But it is not and I can only seek a viable solution to appease my warrior spirit. I would like to offer to be your Vaspraes from this day till my very last moment in this world."

I stand immediately, overwhelmed by his offer. It's not a simple pledge to make. It's a lifetime commitment that cannot be withdrawn or replaced. It is a forgotten forging of bonds, rarely offered nowadays as werewolves do not like it to interfere with their Mating Bonds.

"I could never accept such an offer." I say, flustered. "Goodness! Lazarus would be beside himself if he found out that you would rather pledge yourself to me than remain in service to the country."

It is not just mere words that bind Vaspraes to their partners. Think of it as something cast in stone and reinforced with steel. It is unbreakable.

"Do you think of me as an impulsive man?" He questions sternly and I hesitantly shake my head, almost dislodging my wet hair from the towel wrapped around it.

"Lazarus has more than enough people watching his back. He will not miss me much." Jayden promises with a charming smile.

I shake my head again, "This is not necessary. You do not have to repent because I find no fault in you. We were caught off guard and we should just be grateful that we are alive."

"Yes or no princess." He says offering me the alternative.

I cannot fathom a good enough reason to accept and bound him in service to me forever, "Can I have time to consider it?" I ask, hoping that I could simply never get around to answering it.

Hopefully, he will come to his senses. Jayden has no idea how big of a mistake this is and I would hate for him to come to regret it. He smiles slightly as if guessing my intentions and nods his head once. We both take our seats again before eating in awkward silence.

***

The days following are the hardest. I sleep a lot. Partly because my body is exhausted and partly because I feel depressed. I appreciate the alone time that my position allows me. I never used to like being alone, and even when something did bother me I always had Callan to talk to. Now I only have my aunt, but even she has a warped perception that's hard to overlook. It has been a week since the k********g and the Battle of Storms took place. I cannot hide in my bedroom any longer. I need to start putting my plans into action and for that, I need Alaric. Now I just need to find where that bastard has hidden himself. The dinner tonight will be the perfect opportunity to analyse his sisters. If anyone can get in touch on short notice or call for an immediate audience, it will be one of his family members. Belavina would be the likely choice as she is the closest to him. Lazarus even said she is his favorite. But she would ask too many questions. She would want to know why I wanted an audience with her brother and even worse, I have no doubt that she would tell Lazarus. Lazarus is the last person on this planet that I want to get in the way right now. I call for my personal maids with the press of a button and then go to soak my body in a hot bath. I tie my jet black hair up and sink beneath the water. My skin tingles at the heat of the water washing over my pale skin, but I ignored it. No, Belavina will not do at all. There are too many variables to guarantee an outcome I will like. I stare up at the high ceiling, my head resting on the rim of the luxury tub. One of the twins then. But which one? Four maids make their presence known before coming in to assist me. They have been the same four maids since I was thirteen. I keep them around for more than just their knowledge of my likes and dislikes in fashion. They begin singing almost immediately, whispering every gossip, passed conversations and rumor that they have come across. In another hour, my hair is pinned neatly above my elegant neck, while a black dress, sparkling with silver that glisters under the light hugs my slender body. Lastly, a touch of makeup enhances my features. I cast a quick glance in my gold-framed mirror at the finished product. I know of Lazarus's plans to pressure the Authority into making a decision on the next ruler, but only after his ceremony with Belavina. That's tomorrow. It doesn't leave me much time to disappear before then. My absence would halt all disputes on the next ruler. A decision cannot be made without my presence. Every single living royal has to be present for the election to be valid. Then there are still rumors of the dark witches. Now known for their involvement behind the recent civil war. Demons have been reported throughout the country. Beings that could never appear in this realm without being summoned by a powerful witch.

One issue at a time.

Satisfied with my appearance, I make my way through the palace and towards the dining hall.

Shadow.

My wolf whispers. That is as much as I usually get from her. Warnings through whispers. I cast a glance over my shoulder and sure enough, I'm being trailed. I pause. My breath begins to move faster between my lungs and airways. My heart races in anticipation of flight. I grit my teeth against the fear screaming for me to run, and I almost do when a familiar figure appears with a smile turning his lips. I take deep gulfs of air.

I click my tongue in annoyance, "Jayden, you almost scared me half to death." I complain.

He bows respectfully. His sharp eyes never leave mine, though there is humor playing in them.

"Is there a reason for you crawling about in the shadows like a criminal?" I question curiously.

"I am tasked with your care, Lazarus has requested that I keep an eye on you." He says matter-of-factly. That's going to be a problem.

"Well, if you give me a heart attack you would have failed miserably, don't you think?" I ask, turning to continue on my way without waiting for his reply.

All I need right now is for him to start sprouting nonsense about the Vaspraes Bond. Better that we are not alone. He follows quietly, accompanying me to the dinning hall. The two butlers see us coming and quickly open the large, tall doors so that I don't have to halt my strides or slow my speed. I nod in acknowledgement as I pass. The hall is lit up with candles hanging splendidly from the rows of chandeliers hanging above our heads. The light within the hall is still dim in comparison to the light of electricity, but the nobility enjoy romanticizing their meals. And what is more romantic than eating under candlelight? Groups of families and friends congregate around tables served on by servants that dart in and out of the hall carrying drinks and dishes of food. My presence is announced, interrupting the meals of the gathered nobles and authority members. They rise almost in unity to display their respect due to someone of my status. I offer smiles and nods as I compel my legs to take me to the private table reserved especially for the royals. I don't miss the looks of pity directed my way. No doubt my short time in the hands of our enemy as sparked wild rumors of my treatment. I hold my head higher, keeping as many gazes as I can to show that I am not broken. I am not a doll too fragile for this world. They will see. Everyone will.