The Mirror World

"I-I like you, Demian. W-Would you be my boyfriend?" I looked up at his face to see his reaction. That was my first confession. I hope that I don't mess it up. His eyes lighted up in surprise. His expression was as warm as always. He smiles so widely that his eyelids partly close his golden eyes. I saw the wind blow his smooth and wavy dark hair under the bright sun, and I was awestruck. It was unforgettable. Even on my last day on earth, I will never forget a single thing from the day I confessed to my first love. "Fri, Nov 9" I looked up the phone.  The morning was colder than usual that day. But, I was grateful my head was not hurt as usual. I hope that it stays like that. At least, until I finished my love confession.I have had a constant headache and space out a lot for as long as I can remember. I don't know the reason and it is so frustrating. But, nobody bothered to help me. Still, I would rather have them ignore me instead of giving me unwanted attention. They always says the same thing about me over and over again. I've heard it in the hallway of this orphanage that I lived in. They also gossiped about it in the classroom of the elementary school where I studied. "Kyrara Nox is a freak that is in her own world." They said. Their negativity makes me restless, but not on that day. I slept well and I even woke up before my usual 8 a.m. alarm vibrated that day. I wasn’t feeling sluggish or irritated. Instead, I woke up fresh and well-rested, which was unusual. I looked up at the small window in this huge shared bedroom filled with 11-year-old kids like me. It was still dark outside. Was it 4 a.m. or 5 a.m.? I had no idea. I was given a phone by random donors that is as good as garbage. The phone had a broken screen and the c***k covered the time display perfectly. But, weirdly, my problem with this phone wasn't as irritating as usual. Even so, it was difficult to tell the time in this dimly lit place which was the Orphanage that I'd been living in since I existed. “The Merry Good” is the name of the Orphanage that I loathed so much. This is the place where I`ve lived since I was an infant. The place where my parents abandoned me. I was found when I was only a few days old in front of the gates of this orphanage. It was forced to take me at that time when it had already exceeded its capacity when I arrived. This orphanage and I have no choice but to take each other in. At the time, this orphanage was under the surveillance of reporters for almost 24 hours. The media suspected that the director spent the majority of the donator's money on himself. Their names were already in the mud when they took me in. So, they had no choice but to take me. They have to save their names from being tarnished even further by the news of abandoning a baby and I have no choice but to live in this orphanage until I can live by myself. On top of saving their reputation, I was bringing good luck to them. Because as soon as they took me in, the rumors about embezzlement ceased to exist. However, not too long after that, a new rumor surfaced. People on the street said that this orphanage was protected by a really powerful man from a mysterious organization. So there was speculation that the media, which dug too deep into the orphanage, withdrew because they didn't want to deal with that person. To be clear, I don't care which version of the story is true. However, I hope that the money can be used a little to fix this orphanage. Because this building has definitely reached its limit. This run-down orphanage was inhabited by nearly 50 children with facilities for 25 children. So, one room that should be filled for 5 people is filled with 10 people. Furthermore, there is only one bathroom for every 20 people. Sometimes I don't even get to take a shower. But on that special day, I made sure I took a shower. Since that was the day I confessed to my one and only crush at that time, Demian. I was very excited even at the sheer thought of it. At that time, I knew I was being greedy. For someone like me, friendship alone is a luxury. But, I want to be a little bit selfish and want him for myself and I hope he thinks the same. I was bold, but I didn’t care. At that time, I thought my brave move would be worth the risk because Demian is more than a crush on me. He is my life's savior. He was the only one who saw me as a human being and said my name sweetly instead of in mockery like those people that are supposed to be my friends. Once, an older student from my school pushed me into the pool. They knew I couldn't swim, but I was just a joke to them, so I didn't matter to them or anyone. Or, so I thought until someone rushed to the edge of the swimming pool. A boy older than me by two years ran as fast as he could and jumped into the pool. He swiftly dove and carried me out of the pool. Perhaps it was just my meaningless imagination, but I swear he just teleported to save me. "Wh-Who..?" I mumbled as I looked at a pair of golden eyes that warmly met mine. "I'm Demian Bryon," he said. "I'm glad to save you in time, Kyrara Nox." He grinned as he held me in his arms. "It's so warm. I wish I could stay like this forever," It was all I could think about as I lost consciousness. Later, the school's nurse informed me that Demian carried me himself. He didn’t have to. He could pretend that I didn't exist like everybody else. When I heard how he cared for me at that time, my cheeks blushed as my heart beat fast. It was my first memory of kindness and love after years of hatred. The rest of that day was blurry as nothing other than Demian was of my concern. I only remembered Demian and I treasured every second I had with him. He is the only person that matters to me.  Sadly, I'm probably not the only one that matters to him. I was not the only one that was head over heels for him. Demian was a popular student at my school. Even a social outcast like me knew at that time that Demian came from a rich and powerful family. He was someone out of my reach. I knew that. So, I tried my hardest for my first love confession. And, a perfect love confession starts with a proper bath. On that day, I was the first to enter the bathroom. I took a longer bath than usual and used some makeup there from the older girls. Well, I didn’t care. They have done worse things to me. I turned on the light as I entered the bathroom. It was empty and clean. I was overjoyed. I could take my sweet time getting ready for my love confession after lunch in school. I couldn’t do this If I had to wait in line. It would be too late. Since I have to be ready for my love confession in the schoolyard at 4 p.m. In there, I would confess my love to Demian Bryon. My one and only crush. He is the one that saved me numerous times from cruel older students. In fact, weeks after the pool incident, I was constantly teased by the three dogs of hell from my elementary school. They are Dan, Dave, and Doug, or, as I'd like to call it, Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbest. They are not triplets, but they are perfectly in sync like one. If one of them did something to me, then the others would do the same. And if the other decides to tattle on me to the teacher, saying stuff I didn't do, then the others will happily be the fake witnesses. But, no matter what they do, Demian never fails to protect me. And those dogs of hell were afraid of my guardian angel. Luckily for Demian and me, the teachers were always on Demian's side, even though they clearly hated me. I wonder why they hate me so much. Was it because I'm an orphan who lives in an orphanage? So, why do the other orphans hate me, then? We share the same fate and the same pain, so why am I the outcast? This is frustrating. I may understand why my classmates exclude me, since their parents whispered to their kids that I may have a disease and bad manners as an orphan. But other orphanage kids here are supposed to be my family, so why am I the only one being treated differently in this whole orphanage? Well, it doesn't matter to me anymore. Because at least one person wishes my presence here. My crush, Demian. "Oh, you're here." A red-haired girl let out a heavy sigh. She enters the bathroom as I finish putting on my ragged clothes. "You should've waited for me to finish first before coming in!" I grunted. "Rude as always, huh, Kyra?" She was giving me death stares. "Says the girl who barged into an occupied bathroom without knocking first." I rolled my eyes. "I don't need you to ruin my morning." She clicked her tongue and rolled her eyes as she left. "That makes two of us, Freya Reese," I replied as quickly as she closed the bathroom door loudly. Thud. She closes the door so hard that the door shakes. Until today, I didn't know if she did that on purpose, so the orphanage staff would punish me for closing the door loudly or not. These people are never going to change. I used to be nice to them, but then I gave up when I realized that fact. Oh well, at that time, I didn't mind her rude behavior since I "borrowed" her stashed makeup. That day, I put on the clothes from Freya's drawer. She has this pretty and puffy pink dress with a big bow around the collar. It was given to her by a rich girl who visited the orphanage three years ago. She never used it but she never let anyone take it either, which is not fair since we are supposed to share all the things we have here. The dress has this tiny hole near the waist, but the puffy skirt hides it. So, it's fine. In an orphanage, if the clothes have only 1 to 3 holes, then they are as good as new. Besides, Demian's gaze would be centered on the flowers that I was supposed to give him that day. I had a quick breakfast that morning with a plain toast and strawberry jam. Because I want to gather wildflowers for the confession later. So, I went to the playground and picked up the most vibrant wild flowers I could find. My hands were covered in dirt, but I just shrugged it off. I was so focused that I didn't notice a soccer ball flying toward my hands. Then I heard a loud laugh coming from a boy about twice my size. "Oops, sorry." An older boy laughed, "At first I thought you were a pile of dirt." He taunted me as he concealed his laughter with his hand. I glared at him as he backed away with a horrified face as if he was seeing something he shouldn’t have. It was so odd now that I remembered it again. Why was he so terrified when a girl much smaller than him glared at him? But it didn't cross my mind at that time. I was filled with the excitement of my first love confession. The flowers that I picked reminded me of the pretty cover of a fiction novel that I'd read before. It has this pretty floral pattern on the edge of the cover. That novel was my favorite. I used to read it in the library to escape from the bad guys. For hours, I emerged into a fantasy world that I wished to be part of. Then, Demian would sit beside me and read some ancient historical book that was too hard for me to read. "I didn't know you also liked reading, Kyra." "Had I known that I would've brought you here sooner," he spoke to me softly as he smirked. "Oh, well, I just read fiction. I don't read what you read, or more like, I can't." I looked away bashfully. "Oh, this," he said as he waved the heavy historical book around as if it were just papers. "I just skimmed through it," he continued, “My dad suggested that I read this book. But I also don't understand it that much either." He chuckled as he tossed that book aside and picked up another. "Well, isn't it boring?" I asked nervously. "The book?" "No, I mean being with me." I looked down and said, "You could... You know, play outside with anyone you like. You're pretty popular. So I was wondering why you're with me instead of them." His golden eyes looked slightly down as he looked at the floor's tiles. "You don't want me to be here?" He glanced at me with a sad look. "No, of course not, I want you to be here." "It's just that..." I struggled so hard at that time to avoid a misunderstanding. "Then, that's that." He continued to read. "Wait, that's what?." "What do you mean?" I arched my eyebrows in confusion. "I do what I want. I won’t let anyone force me to do anything." He stared at me intensely. "Including you, Kyra. So, when I want to be with you, don't force me to be with someone else." At that time, I was so tired of my life that I wanted to go somewhere far from these people and this place. But in the darkest corner of this library, I can see clearly that he is my source of light. And, for the first time, I wanted to stay instead of leave. Demian looked into my eyes when I looked at him. My heart was beating so fast that I became breathless. I was anxious that one day he would leave me for no reason. I hope he stays with me all the time. So, I pulled up all my courage to confess. I prepared everything I thought I needed to confess based on a TV drama I once watched. FYI, it was Nurse Miranda who was binge-watching it, not me. She always turned on that noisy old TV when I was 5 years old. I am a light sleeper, so the TV never fails to wake me up. But I didn't have the courage to ask her to turn off the TV because she was so terrifying. I heard she made a child older than me cry with just a stare. So, I just watched that drama instead in secret since I've got nothing better to do. All that drama has almost the same ending. The male actor will confess his love to the female actress. He will have a nice suit, a bouquet of red roses, and a ring to propose. Then, the female actress will be surprised by the proposal and accept it with a nod and a crying face. It was cringy and unfamiliar to me, who had no concept of love. I thought I would never get to feel that way, since I hate everyone as much as everyone hates me. But here I am, about to confess my feelings for a boy I've only known for a few months because he is kind to me. The time on my phone showed that it was already 4 p.m. In the backyard of my school, I was standing with the flowers and the dress. The sky was clear and the backyard was empty. It was perfect, as if God was on his side for the first time. Then, my breath stopped for a moment. Demian was right in front of me. He was alone, which is unusual. But, I didn’t think much of it at that time. I walked slowly towards him as I held the measly bouquet of wildflowers in my trembling hands. Then, the three words escaped my lips. I also didn't forget to ask him to be my boyfriend.  I stuttered my first love's confession, but he still smiled as if it was the sweetest thing that he had ever heard. Then he looked at me as if he knew what I wanted to hear. So, I listened closely to his reply. “Kyra…,” said he softly. “I freaking hate you.”