THE NEARNESS OF YOU (The Thorntons #1)

Chapter 1-1

Chapter One

“James Daniels?”

“It’s Flannigan,” Sara Flannigan said automatically to the nurse before turning to her son James. “Time to go in.”

James shrugged as he continued to play his video game, but he followed his mother into the back of the doctor’s office without any more protest. Six years old and already as stubborn as any adult, Sara reflected with an inward shake of her head. James was the love of her life ever since he’d been placed in her arms, all red and wrinkly and screaming to the heavens.

“Let’s get the boring stuff out of the way,” the nurse said as she got James’s height and weight before ushering them into one of the rooms.

Sara hated the smell of these rooms—antiseptic and cold, the paper on the tables crackling as James would inevitably fidget from boredom. They hadn’t been in a doctor’s office in six months, not since James’s amazing pediatrician in Seattle had told her that her son was healthy, still in remission, and not in need of constant doctor’s visits.

But when she’d felt his swollen lymph nodes in his neck, Sara had made an appointment for him to see a family doctor here in the small town of Fair Haven, where they had moved just two months ago. That doctor hadn’t taken her concerns seriously.

So, now she was here, seeing the best pediatric oncologist in Fair Haven to make certain her son’s cancer hadn’t returned.

“Everything looks good. I’ll let Dr. Thornton know you’re here.” The nurse smiled at James, who continued to play his video game, kicking his heels against the table.

Sara rubbed her hands. She should’ve brought a sweater. Why were doctors’ offices so damn cold? She’d never been in one that didn’t result in her shivering from the blast of air conditioning no matter the time of year.

She told herself that more than likely James’s swollen lymph nodes were nothing. Probably just a cold. His cancer had been in remission for over four years, but she couldn’t stop the memories flooding her all the same. He’d had the same symptoms when he’d been just a toddler, and she’d assumed it had been nothing. Until the doctor had told her the tumor had spread to his bones and they were lucky it hadn’t spread to his bone marrow just yet…

“Mrs. Daniels,” Dr. Thornton said as he entered the room.

When Sara looked up from her clenched fists, she had to keep her jaw from dropping open.

This was Dr. Thornton? This gorgeous man, barely in his thirties, with dark hair and deep green eyes?

Sara swallowed against a suddenly dry throat. “It’s Flannigan,” Sara replied lamely, completely tongue-tied. She hadn’t had time yet to legally change back to her maiden name after her divorce; thus, she was constantly reminded that she had been married to her cheating ex once upon a time.

But her cheating ex disappeared from her thoughts as she realized that not only was her doctor one of the well-to-do Thorntons of Fair Haven, Washington, but that he didn’t even have the grace to grow up to be fat and ugly, too.

Of course he was a Thornton. She’d read his last name online, but for whatever reason, she’d been so worried about James that she hadn’t put two and two together. That was just her luck, wasn’t it?

Of course he was beautiful. Tall and muscular, he filled out his doctor’s coat too well. She’d known that his father was a doctor, but she hadn’t known that the eldest Thornton had pursued medicine as well.

The entire Thornton family was considered royalty in Fair Haven. Wealthy, beautiful, and talented, their six children had always been the most popular kids in school. While Sara had grown up in a trailer park with her alcoholic mother and angry younger sister, the Thorntons had represented a life she could only imagine in her dreams. To have both parents—successful and healthy—in your life? To drive brand-new cars, attend the best schools, play any sport or take up any after-school activity you wanted without worrying about the expense? Sara had had to give up on playing in band in sixth grade when her mom could no longer make payments on the cheap rental flute she’d gotten Sara to play. She remembered the shiny new flute Lizzie Thornton had gotten that same year, and how Sara had been green with envy.

Dr. Thornton glanced up, and Sara’s reverie was broken. “Flannigan. I know that name. Are you…?”

“Ruth Flannigan’s daughter? Yes, that’s me.”

His expression changed, like he was seeing her for the first time. If she didn’t know better, she’d think he was checking her out.

But he turned away, and Sara told herself she was imagining things. As if one of the snobby Thorntons would glance her way! She was all too aware of what they thought about people like her, people who had grown up poor and with an absent father and an alcoholic mother. Dr. Thornton—Harrison Thornton—had been infamous in school for driving a Porsche to school after he’d turned sixteen. Sara remembered getting off the bus at the junior high next door to the high school and seeing that bright red car pull into the school parking lot, Harrison looking like the coolest guy on the planet.

Harrison wasn’t that cool young teenager anymore. Now, he was a self-assured man who exuded confidence in every move he made. Sara couldn’t help but watch him with interest, telling herself she was merely intrigued. She wasn’t attracted to him. She wasn’t thinking about how warm his hand had been when she’d shaken it, or how he could easily be mistaken for some famous actor, with his chiseled good looks, wide shoulders, and imposing stature.

“And you must be James.” Harrison held out his hand to her son, which James took after a moment’s hesitation. “How are you today?”

James shrugged. This had become his favorite gesture as of late. “Fine.”

“His lymph nodes are swollen,” Sara interjected. “He had similar symptoms when he was first diagnosed.”

Harrison nodded, sitting down. He flipped through his chart. “He was diagnosed with neuroblastoma at age twenty-two months, correct? And he’s been in remission…for almost four years?”

“Yes, that’s correct. When he was diagnosed, it had already spread to his left femur.”

Sara could rattle off every symptom, every issue, every diagnosis related to James’s cancer without blinking. She’d fought the disease with only herself to lean on, as her ex-husband had preferred to avoid all of the appointments and doctors’ visits as much as he could. Sara’s world had become cancer, cancer, cancer. When James had finally gone into remission, part of her hadn’t known what to do with herself.

“He hasn’t had any other symptoms?” Harrison scribbled some notes.

“None, although he has a large bruise on his right shin bone that concerns me.”

“Mom, I told you, Travis kicked me when we were playing soccer.” James continued to kick his heels against the table. “I’m fine.”

“You probably are fine, but it’s better to be safe than sorry, right?” Harrison got up to put on some gloves before beginning his examination. “Have you felt tired at all? Sick to your stomach?”

James shook his head.

“How’s school going?”

“Fine.”

Sara sighed. “He started first grade this past fall. He’s been placed in the gifted program.” She couldn’t help but be proud of that accomplishment. She’d struggled in school, but seeing her boy be at the top of his class already? Her chest swelled with satisfaction.

“Really? That’s great. What do you like to do for fun?” Harrison looked in James’s ears and mouth as he rattled off his usual questions.

“I play soccer. It’s fun, although I get in trouble when I touch the ball with my hands.”

Harrison chuckled, which made a shiver run up Sara’s spine. Why did he have to be so damn attractive? It wasn’t fair.

“I was never very good at soccer,” he admitted. “I prefer basketball. You can touch the ball all you want in basketball.”

James frowned. “Jack Talbert said I was too short to play basketball and that I’ll never grow bigger than I am now.”

“Well, I can tell you that Jack Talbert can’t see the future, but more importantly, one of my best buds isn’t very tall and he’s the best point guard I’ve ever seen.”

James’s eyes widened. “Really?”

“Really. Being tall is helpful when playing basketball, but there are tons of players out there who play and aren’t seven feet tall.” Harrison winked. “Now, let’s feel these lymph nodes of yours.”

Sara held her breath as he examined her son’s neck. Both nodes had seemed larger than normal when she’d checked them, like oversized rubbery bumps. James had told her they didn’t hurt, which just concerned her more. When he’d been diagnosed, he’d had the same exact symptoms.

She tried to push away the wash of anxiety that filled her belly. If James’s cancer came back, she’d have to quit her job to care for him. When he’d been diagnosed as a toddler, she’d been a stay-at-home mom while Kyle had worked full-time. But she’d just started working as a third-grade teacher here in Fair Haven. How would she support them both if James were sick?

Harrison sat back down to make some notes.

On the edge of her seat, Sara finally blurted, “Well?”

“Based on just the swollen lymph nodes, I’m fairly certain the cancer hasn’t returned,” he replied in a calm voice. “That being said, we want to be sure of these things, so I’m ordering a blood test just in case.”

James let out an annoyed sigh. Sara knew he was beyond tired of needles.

“And if his cancer has returned?” she asked in a tight voice.

“Then we’ll make a plan for treatment. We can do the blood test right here today, and we’ll have results by the end of the week, if not sooner.”

She let out a breath. Her anxiety continued to simmer in her gut, but seeing her boy playing his game and kicking his heels, she had a difficult time believing that he was sick again.

She just prayed she was right.