Chasing Second Chances: Finn & Sawyer

Chapter Nine

Sawyer

You know that moment when fate plays a cruel joke on you, rips the rug under you so you fall back, feet in the air, back slamming into the floor with a loud thud, the door slams on your hand leaving bruises and swollen to the point where you can’t even use it, the drink explodes in your face making your skin so sticky, no matter how much you clean it, the stickiness forever stays and in the mist of all that misfortune, fate points and laughs? This was that moment. Fate was playing a goddamn cruel joke on me and I couldn’t be more aggravated.

The man that has occupied my mind almost every night, the unnamed man with the gorgeous eyes and mouth watering body and panty melting smirk, making good use of my battery operated friends, the man that stared in my fantasies, imagining his large rough hands caressing all the dips and curves of my body, his soft lips brushing along my neck, hitting that one spot that I know will make me moan, his hard body pushed up against mine as my hands would feel all of his muscles, memorizing every inch of his godlike body, was standing right in front of me.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Because the man that warmed my center like no other has before, come to find out, is also the man that said some of the rudest, meanest comments about me before he even knew me. This is the man who didn’t want me in the lives of his family and friends over something he had no knowledge of. This is the man who I have never met in the two months I’ve been here all because I have avoided meeting him as much as possible.

The girls don’t know that it was on purpose and I will never admit that out loud.

Working two jobs has its benefits. Every time they planned some sort of get together, which was almost every damn weekend because that’s just how they roll. I guess having money, it lets you do whatever you want whenever you want. It used to be like that for Aiden and me until my daughter’s sperm donor stole all of my money. Anyways, they would invite me over for the get togethers as well as the children, but I would always end up working. Sara would watch the kids for me on the weekends but she would only bring them around a time or two because as she says, she see’s most of these people almost every day and as much as she loves them, she needs a break from them once in a while. When she told me that the first time, I laughed.

There has been a time or two when I was able to meet up with everyone but I was sneaky when it came to that point. I would make sure the asshole wasn’t there. The girls tried to tell me he was saying those things out of fear and frustration. They said he really didn’t mean it because he was really a softie and a puppy at heart who’s just looking out for his loved ones. A part of me understood. Hell, I did something similar when it came to Aiden’s ex-girlfriend before he got her pregnant. She was known to use people and cause a lot of trouble so when she came into his life, I accused her of just that. I accused her of using Aiden for his money because of who our father was and in the end, I was right. I didn’t want to be and I felt like s**t for saying such things but I was right. So, I can see where Finn was worried about his family and the baggage I carried.

But, at the same time, I have also learned to not judge a book by its cover and that is something my daughter will always know and live by. That is what he is doing with me. He's judging me and making assumptions on someone he doesn’t know. At least with Aiden’s ex, I knew her.

“You!” I yelled out, immediately stepping out of his arms and straightening my clothes. I took a lot of time to make myself look professional today. I was wearing a black knee length skirt and a button down soft blue tank top blouse with my black pumps. I wanted to make a good impression, showing Eli that I was more than his daughter’s friend, more than the single mom with a four year old daughter, more than the runaway they see me as.

“I don’t believe we met.” He grinned and winked at the same time and I just wanted to throat punch him so hard. He knows damn well we met before. “I’m Finn and you must be Sawyer?” he held his hand out for me to shake. I took one look at it and refused to touch it. No thank you.

“And with that I’m leaving.” I tried to walk around him but his body blocked the door so I couldn’t leave, “Can you move? I need to go grovel and get my jobs back.”

“Why would you need to get them back when you have an amazing one here?” Eli said behind me, making me turn and glare, “I understand your concerns Sawyer so let’s do a trial run. Let’s see how things work out between you guys and if this isn’t a good fit, then I will find another place in the company for you.”

“I would rather not Eli. You see, this is the dipshit that ran into me earlier in the week making me lose the paperwork for Miles to join the program, a program which I no longer qualify for since I work, well worked, for the company. If I never would have run into him, I would have been able to hand in the application and Miles could possibly be here but instead, he’s sitting in daycare.” I was pissed. I figured that was the only way I lost that paper was because of the collision when everything went flying. I don’t understand how it went missing but it was the only thing I can think of.

“Miles? Like little Miles that Sara has been bringing to work here?” Finn asked, making my eyebrows pinch together with a slight glare.

“What do you know about my nephew?”

“Well, let’s just saying owning this program has its benefits. I’ll make you a deal Sawyer.” He grinned and looked behind me at his dad who had his arms crossed and chuckled, “You work with me and see how things go and Miles can stay in the program.”

“What?”

“You heard me. You stay and be my assistant and he can stay with the program.”

“Are you out of your mind?” I started to raise my voice. Now, he was bribing me to stay with him as his assistant, the f**k, “You are the one that said all that crap about how I shouldn’t be around because of my past. You assumed the worst of me and didn’t want my family to be part of your families lives and now, you’re trying to get me to stay on as your assistant? You are a grade a asshole.” I glared at him while pointing my finger at him with every word that came out of my mouth. I heard Eli snicker behind me and I can tell from the look on his face, he’s not used to someone telling him how it is.

“Damn son, what the hell did you do to her?”

“How could I have done anything when this is the first full conversation I am having with her face to face besides knocking into her on the sidewalk where I dropped all those pastries.”

“What?” Eli gasped, making me turn to look at him, “You were the reason why the bear claws were crushed. I’m hurt Sawyer, very hurt. I think you owe it to me to stay for a bit to make it up to us. We went hungry that morning.” I can’t believe them.

“Poor you.” I rolled my eyes at him as he just chuckled, making turn to look back at Finn. I wanted so hard to be mad but one look at him and I just wanted to melt, but I am stronger than that. I refuse to fall for another guy with a pretty face and an attitude problem. I refused to be hurt again.

He stood there with his arms cross and his face went emotionless for a bit as he just raised an eyebrow at my tantrum. To be honest, I was fighting this not only because of what he said, but because I want to cling on him like a goddamn koala and that scares the s**t out of me. I refuse to let those feelings emerge and the easiest way for that to happen is to distance myself as much as possible from him.

I needed to make sure I keep my distance from him.

“Sawyer.” He whispered, taking another step towards me, bringing his hands and rubbing my shoulders sending shivers down my spine, “What I said before to the girls was out of line. I know that. You know that. They know that. But what you need to understand is…”

“I don’t want to hear it.” I stopped him, “I don’t want to work with someone who is that closed minded. I have been doing this on my own for so long Finn, I don’t need a handout such as this and neither does Ivy or Miles.”

I pushed past him and started to walk out of the room and towards the stairs, angry that I would let someone who I don’t even know get under my skin. My phone was going off, but I ignored every single message, telling myself I would answer them later. I just wanted to get home and crawl into bed until the kids came back. I wanted to talk to Aiden and tell him what happened. Maybe he can open my eyes and give me some insight to help me make a decision.

Is going back to the diner and the bar the best decision for me? Is that what I really want to do? Do I really want to go back to working from eight in the morning, missing the children all day, come home for two hours just to go back out to the bar and bartend until midnight, if not later? All these thoughts were running through my head as I saw the doors that led to the gorgeous Texas sun. Freedom was fifteen feet away. Ten feet. Eight feet. Five. I was almost there. Was I taking this a bit overboard? Possibly. But I didn’t want to be around him and I didn’t want anymore handouts. I didn’t want this to be a pity job offer. And just thinking of what he said infuriated me.

A hand grabbed mine just as I was about to walk through the automatic doors but the hand wasn’t forceful, but gentle. His fingers wrapped around mine fully, making me stop mid step. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath. To be honest, feeling his hand on mine scared me. I haven’t been touched my any other man in so long, minus the hugs from my brother and Felix. Felix is just another brother to me but when a hand grabbed my hand, I prayed that when I turned around it would be Eli stopping me.

I turned and met the blue eyes that continue to haunt me. I kept my face as emotionless as possible. I didn’t want to show all the thoughts that were running through my head. The endless hours on my feet that I would have to do once I walk out those doors, the time away from my daughter, the stress and strain on my body, it was all something I didn’t want, but in the end, I will do what I have to do.

“Sawyer, come with me and then if you decide to walk out those doors I won’t stop you.” He said softly, pulling me back just a bit away from the door.

“No Finn. I appreciate what your dad is trying to do but I can’t work with someone who is so mean and rude. I won’t put myself through that kind of stress and environment. It’s not good for anyone’s mental health.”

“I know my apologies won’t mean anything but all I’m asking for is fifteen minutes and if you still want to leave I will hold the door open for you. What do you have to lose?” My dignity? My pride? My self-respect? “Please. I know you have no reason to trust or believe me, but those things I said are not me.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Let me show you a reason to stay. Just fifteen minutes.” I looked into his eyes and the cockiness that I once saw at the beginning of this whole mess was gone and instead, showed sincerity and sorry. He gave me a soft smile and nodded his head to the side, “Come on Sawyer, follow me.”

I let out a breath that I was holding and threw my head back in frustration. I wanted to tell him no so bad and tell him to f**k off, but what did I have to lose at this point? If I don’t like what I see, I can just walk away. “Fifteen minutes Finn. That’s it. If I don’t like what I see, then I’m leaving.”

He slowly let go of my hand and my hand instantly felt cold but I ignored the feeling and followed Finn throughout the building, following him to the ultimate destination. “So, this is the reception area. We have state of the art security systems placed throughout the entire building including in all arenas throughout the inside and outside of the stadium. The only places where there are no cameras is of course all locker rooms, bathrooms and anywhere there are possibilities of indecent exposures.”

“Does that include the offices?” I said under my breath, but he heard me. He paused mid step and turned and c****d an eyebrow at me, “Sorry. I’ve heard stories.”

“And they’re stories Summer. You reprimand me on judging you before I got to know you so I would hope you would do me the same courtesy.” And I was stunned by what he said. I didn’t expect him to come right out and call me out like that, it was beyond unexpected but he was right.

I gave him a soft smile and nodded, “I’m sorry, you’re right. I should preach what I say and all I can do right now is say I can try my best.”

“I’ll take what I can get.” He laughed and smiled. Damn, his smile is infectious, “Anyways, our computer systems are the best we can get to help with organization in all areas of the business. We have two indoor gyms fully loaded with all the exercise equipment possible, an Olympic sized pool, two basketball courts that can also be used for anything else we need, two baseball fields outside with batting cages, a full sized football field and two hockey rinks. We got donations from different companies and sponsors to help fund the program for the children to ensure they have the best equipment possible. All equipment is tailored to each child and at the end of the program, they can take it home.”

“Really? I didn’t know that. I was sure that you would reuse the equipment for the next round of children next year.”

“It started off as that, but we also understand that like technology, equipment is forever changing. New, better models are constantly being released and we plan on making sure have the best, so every year this program is up and running, the kids will get the newest and the best that we can get our hands on.”

“That is actually pretty admirable. I’m impressed. So, what did you want to show me that will make me change my mind about working for you?”

“Right through those doors up there.” He pointed to the steps that were to the right that had a set of double doors at the top. We climbed the stairs one by one in an uneasy yet comfortable silence. He opened the door for me with a smile, “Right this way Sawyer.”

A blast of cold air rushed over my body as I walked through the doors and onto an observation deck that overlooked both ice rinks they had in the building. Instant goosebumps formed over my body as I shivered. I felt a coat drape over my shoulder and his hands on my arms from behind me, rubbing them to keep them warm. I decided to let him instead of pulling away because well, I’m freaken cold.

“Come this way.” He whispered, pushing toward the rink of the right, “Look down there.”

I took a look out the window and I felt a small smile form on my lips. Children, around Ivy’s age and Ivy, skating around with some coaches teaching them how to spin and twirl. During the winters back home in Buffalo, the kids loved going to the rink as much as possible and Ivy loved to skate and try to twirl. She loved watching the ice skaters on TV and online, wanting to be one when she gets older. My breath hitched as she attempted to spin and fell on her bottom. My hand instantly went to the glass as I gasped, wanting to run down the stairs and making sure she was okay, but my girl stood back up on her skates, laughed and continued on like she had no care in the world.

“Look at how happy she is, all of them. And look over here.” His hand went to my lower back, taking me to the other side that looked over the other ice rink. It was a handful of children around Miles’ age and Miles, skating around with hockey equipment, listening to the coaches as they gave the children drills. We stood there and watched them skate for about ten minutes, not saying a word. When the whistle blew twice, they took off their helmets and they were laughing and high fiving one another. Tears welled in my eyes seeing both the children happy and doing something they love.

“This is what we’re about Sawyer. Putting those smiles on the children’s faces and helping them make their dreams come true, especially with families who don’t exactly have the means to be able to have their children do something like this. It was wrong of me to use Miles and Ivy to get you to work with me and I apologize for that. No matter what you choose, they will have a place in this program, both of them.”

“But I don’t understand, how did they get a place?”

“Miles told me about how you ran and the paper got lost and I take partial blame for that.“ I turned my head and raised an eyebrow at him, making him throw his head back and laugh, “Okay, I take full responsibility for it.” He pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket and handed it to me.

Opening it, I realize it was the application for Miles but it was smudged. “I found it under the box of pastries I dropped that day. I tried to chase after you but you were gone and it was so beyond smudged, I couldn’t read it. Sara told me that you asked Sadie for another application and she said there wasn’t. That is not the case so I apologize for that as well. If she would have handed it to you, Miles would have been here since the first day.”

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault” Why was I trying to reassure him? Because honestly, it wasn’t.

“It might not be, but I am taking responsibility for it. Miles is a great kid with a lot of potential and him being out there, having a blast, just reminds me of why I started this. Ivy is a hoot.” He chuckled, “And she loves you and wants you to be happy. So Sawyer, make yourself happy. If walking out of here, away from all of this,” He pointed to the ice rinks where the kids are, “makes you happy. If going back to working both jobs makes you happy, then go be happy. But I really do believe, once we put our differences aside, you could be happier here.”

I tuned my head a bit and looked up at him, closed my eyes and did a small smile. “Give me the day to think about it. If I show up tomorrow then you have your answer.” I took off his suit coat and handed it back to him, instantly feeling the cold rush back over my skin. Turning around and going down the stairs with one mission in mind, putting space between us, I walked towards the exit, thinking about what I was going to do.

“Sawyer!” I heard someone yell my name. I turned around and saw Eli walking towards me, “wait up.” I paused my step and waited for him to catch up to me.

“How can I help you Eli?” I asked him.

“So, what are your thoughts?”

I smiled a bit and looked back up the stairs where I just left, seeing Finn standing by the glass looking down on the rink, smiling. Something about him just sent these strange feelings throughout my body but if I do this, I need to make sure I don’t mix business and pleasure. I refuse to do that; I am not that kind of person. “Don’t tell him but I’ll be back tomorrow.”

With that, Eli grinned and laughed, “I’ll make him sweat a bit for the things he said about you.” And he turned and started to walk the opposite direction of where Finn was, to the offices where we were before, “Oh and Sawyer, welcome to the team. We are lucky to have you.”