My Boss & Me

Some Truth

"You're what?!!" Dee screamed at me in the middle a diner, while we were having lunch.

I could feel a few people looking but everyone was listening now. "Could you not scream? People are starting to stare." That was the wrong thing to say. She then glanced around the room and saw the people looking or trying not to look.

"You people can't mind your own damn business? Eat your damn food!" She screamed and all at once they dropped their eyes to their plates or back to the person they were having lunch with. Dee took a deep breath and turned back to me and in a quieter voice spoke again. "You are pregnant. That's fine. Julien is a great guy."

"It isn't his...It's Markus'." I said quietly just waiting for her to freak again. Which she did.

"What!? Are you insane?" She screamed standing up from her seat.

"Would you please calm down." I said pulling her arm for her to sit back down. "I'm 4 months along so I know it isn't Julien's. It must be from the trip. The business trip that turned out to be more than business. Besides Julien and I haven't even...done that." It was true. I felt so guilty about sleeping with Markus just minutes after Julien and I had our moment in the elevator I couldn't.

She let out a sigh, "What are you going to do? You have to tell him."

"Why so he can accuse me of trying to trap him? Because that's whats going to happen." She didn't respond because she knew I was right. He was a rich business owner and I was his secretary. I slept with my boss, Markus wouldn't be the only one to come up with that conclusion. Even though he was the one who manipulated my feelings to sleep with him.

This was going to turn into a mess quick. "You still have to tell him. He is the father. He deserves to know and if that is what he says then so be it. But you both know the truth."

Deep down I knew she was right but I just couldn't risk it. We finished our lunches and she walked me back to work. "Tell him. Trust me." She said before I walked back inside. There was one person I had to tell...Julien. This was going to ruin our relationship and there wasn't anything I could do about it. I would have to tell him tonight, in person that was always better than over the phone.

When I got back to my desk I gave him a call and we agreed on a time and place for dinner. I wasn't sure if he could tell something was wrong but he didn't seem like he caught on to it.

"Miss. Harrison. If you are done making personal calls please get back to work."

I heard over the speaker connecting my phone to his. I looked over at the window separating us and saw him looking at me. His stare made me feel a mixture of emotions I couldn't quite explain. I looked away and back to my computer. I didn't really have much work to do so when I finished with that all I did was answer phone calls and work on my own novel.

Markus seemed interested in it a few weeks ago but that could be a ploy to get me to forgive him for what he did that night. The writer in me is telling me to take the chance, this may be the only chance I have to get my book published. The woman in me is telling me not to fall for it. He's messed with me once, why not do it again.

The whole rest of the day I avoided Markus as much as I possibly could. I only spoke to him if it concerned work and only looked his way if he needed me for said work. I even went as far as refusing to ride the same elevator as him alone. I didn't want this news to slip out, I had to break it delicately to both Markus and Julien.

As I packed my things at the end of the night, I could feel him staring through his office window. I was determined to leave with the others and not be stuck with him alone. I moved as slowly as the others did and when they began to leave so did I. Unfortunately I wasn't fast enough to catch the elevator with them so I had to wait for the next one. Fortunate for me the next elevator was my new friend and came just before he left his office. I watched him rush from the office to the elevators. He watched me and I watched him. I hit the button for the first floor and the button that closes the doors.

I didn't realize I was holding my breath until the door closed and the elevator began to lower. I let out a breath and closed my eyes. I was able to get a cab before he reached the lobby. Now to do it all again tomorrow.

******

The next month went by pretty quickly, I didn't even have to try to avoid him as much since he was starting to get busier with meetings with clients and potential investors.

I worked up the courage to tell Julien a week later. As imagined, it did not go well. He wasn't angry or anything. In fact he was supportive but he said he wouldn't be able to handle the triangle that would potentially develop and with a kid in the middle it would be best for him to stay out of it. Yes, it hurt but it made sense.

I hated all of this. My life was ruined, at least as far as I could tell. I wanted to be a writer and this job got my foot in the door. Then I sleep with my boss, which we both could have gotten over eventually, but nope, the universe thought of a cruel joke to ruin my life. What could I possibly have done to deserve a baby by a man who doesn't even respect me as a person let alone a writer.

Thanks to the busy month we haven't had any personal interaction for him to even notice anything weird but unfortunately others in the office have. Some have said things to be but its getting harder to lie to them or at least for them to believe me. I am four months along now which means I am starting to show. I've been hoping that people will just think I've gained weight and not mention it and praying even more that Markus just doesn't notice and start asking questions. I know he will think its Julien's but if Julien doesn't come around for so long he will know something is up.

Unfortunately life doesn't work the way you want.

Unwillingly Markus and I had to go out together for another meeting. We had done everything we could to avoid one of these kinds of meeting since we had to sit in a car together for some time to get to said destination but this one could not be avoided. As we rode in the company car, a horrible smell seeped through the car. It wasn't a horrible smell just to my pregnancy nose it was too much to handle. You can guess what happened next — yep I threw up. I begged the driver to stop and stuck my head out the door.

"Are you OK?"

"I'm fine" I responded once I'd finished my puking. He sounded genuine in his concern but its always hard to tell with him, even after four months of knowing the man,

"Are you sure? You look sick, do you want to go to the hospital?"

"You are overreacting. I puked, people puke its not a big deal."

"But people don't just puke randomly. With no warning unless they are sick and if you are you should have told me I wou—"

"Markus, I'm pregnant. We drove through a smell it made me sick now please drop it." There I told him. Nothing more to do.

"O-oh, well congratulations to you and Julien."

What I should have said:

'It isn't Julien's, its yours. I'm a little over four months along. Julien and I broke up because of it.'

What I actually said:

"Thank you, now can we just focus on preparing for this meeting?"