Protect Me From Myself

Chapter.2.

Kirby

Present day

Left. Right. Left. Right. Right. Kick.

There's nothing better than a good workout. Kickboxing, Judo, or any form of martial arts, really. Anything that keeps my damn mind from wandering to her. She could have been mine. She should have been mine. She would have been had I clarified what I wanted from her.

But what did I do?

I fuc.ked her and walked away.

Why did I walk away?

Because she told me she loved me.

Why did she have to fuc.king tell me that?

I loved her just as much, but I couldn't give her what she wanted or needed at that moment in time. There was just too much for me to deal with then. I couldn't have given her what she needed, but God knows I wanted to.

But how could I have exposed her to the damaged fu.ck-up I was?

It took me six months to realize I could handle anything as long as she was mine. I loved her more than life itself. I wanted her. I needed her so badly. But I was too late; she'd moved on. I had no one to blame but myself.

And now she's getting fuc.king married... in two bas.tard weeks! Am I supposed to just sit back and let it happen? I won't, I can't. I'll stop her somehow. I don't give a fuc.k what it takes; she will be mine again.

Left. Right. Left. Right. Right. Right. Left. Kick. Kick.

Fu.ck it!

“Rivera.” I snap breathlessly before taking a long gulp of water.

“I need your help.”

“Kody, what's up?” My little brother sounds anxious.

“Can you get back to Seattle ASAP?”

“Yeah. My plane leaves in two hours.” I've been in New York for a couple of months. I needed to get away before this damn wedding.

Why would she think I'd want to attend?

Because I told her we'd always be friends, no matter what.

Plus, I needed to clear my head and figure out what to do next. I locked myself away from the world, never answering my phone, never speaking to anyone. I simply locked myself in my rental apartment, where I've stayed ever since. If I didn't have the in-house gym in the spare room, I would have gone crazy.

“You gonna tell me why you sound distressed? You're kinda worrying me here, little bro.”

“It's Nevaeh,” Just the sound of her name makes my heart ache. The whole should have been mine. “She's missing.”

“Say that again?”

“She's missing, Kirby. Has been for weeks. There's been no trace of her at all. Cops are saying she's dead, but there's nobody.”

“What the fuc.k?” I can hardly get my words out. My head begins to spin. She can't be gone. It's not possible. She belongs to one of the most well-known families in the country.

Neveah has more security trailing her than the damn president. There's no way she could have availed them. There's no way anything bad could have happened to her without them knowing about it within seconds. And there's no way I wouldn't have read about it. Okay, I don't read newspapers, but it would have been all over the news, surely?

Ah fuc.k, I haven't switched on the TV in months.

What the hell have I done? I should have been there for her like I promised I always would be.

“Why the fuc.k didn't you call me before now, Kody?”

“I was waiting for proof that she was dead. I'm sorry. I thought they would have found her body right away. But there's no sign, Kirby. Even though the cops are saying she's dead, Chance won't hear of it, and he knows Neveah better than anyone. You're the best P. I there is.” That's going a little far. “Chance is going out of his mind, and Paris is worried about him.”

“Why haven't I heard anything about this?”

“When was the last time you watched TV? Read a newspaper?”

“Good point.”

“The media died down pretty quickly. Well, as soon as the police put out a statement that Neveah was dead. They asked that everyone give the family some privacy to grieve.” She can't be dead. She just can't. “Meet me at Chance's as soon as you get here, and I'll tell you everything we know.”

“Be there soon.” I end the call and race to my hotel room. I'm showered and out of there in thirty minutes.

Wherever you are, baby, I will find you. I'll find you, and I'll fuc.king kill whoever has taken you. And God help them if they've hurt you.

* * *

Chance Archer is a mess. Not that I'm far behind him. He looks like he hasn't slept in days. Which isn't good for a man with epilepsy. He's been pacing his living room floor for the past ten minutes while his wife began explaining everything before Nevaeh went missing. From what I've gathered so far, she was beyond unhappy.

“The day before Nevaeh went missing, she asked me to take care of Chance and to make sure he was safe. Then she asked me to make sure I told the kids every day that she loved them. To tell Raine, Nate, and their kids the same. Her parents and Katy. She told me that she loves me too, and she'll miss me. I didn't pay much attention because Hannah was throwing a tantrum, and CJ was fussing.”

The woman looks all set to have a breakdown. This can't be easy for Paris, with two toddlers to take care of, as well as everything else. Plus, one of those toddlers has epilepsy like his father.

“This isn't your fault, angel eyes,” Chance says without looking at his wife. “It's mine. I should have listened to you and Bonnie when you told me something wasn't right between Nevaeh and David.”

“What do you mean?” I chime in.

“Bonnie and Paris have been trying to tell me for months that something wasn't right. Of course, I believed them, but Nevaeh said they were just being stupid. She's my sister, we're connected, I always know when something's wrong. I had to believe she'd tell me if something bad was happening.”

“Bad?”

“They seemed to think he'd been physically hurting her.”

“What the hell?” I jump to my feet, anger seeping through my veins like venom. I'll fuc.king kill him! “He was hurting her, and nobody stopped him?!”

“Bro, calm down.” My brother shakes his head at me.

Okay, maybe it's inappropriate to flip out right now, but my blood is boiling. I swore to Nevaeh that nobody would ever hurt her. I swore that I would always be there for her.

“Do you honestly think I would have stood by and done nothing had I known?” No, I know full well Chance Archer would have buried the guy alive. “There is no man on this earth who would ever be safe from me should they touch my sister!”

Yes, buddy, I know that too.

“Whenever I saw Nevaeh, she seemed happy. I asked her more than once if anything was going on. If David hurt her. She laughed at me and told me not to be so dramatic and overprotective. I stupidly listened to her. I should have known she was blocking me from reading her emotions. How did I, of all people, not realize how desperately unhappy she was? She's my twin, for fu.ck's sake! We have an unbreakable bond. I should have known!”

“It's not your fault, Chance.”

“Then whose fault is this if not mine, Kody? My mother is heartbroken. My father isn't much better. My baby sister won't sleep or eat because she's missing Neva so much. And my big sister has had so many seizures over the past few days that I'm terrified I'll lose her too.

“Neva would never just go off and not tell anybody why. I know in my heart that she's not dead; I also know she would never put her family through this willingly.”

“Unless she had no other choice.”

“What do you mean, Kirb?”

I suck in a deep breath through my nose and turn to my brother. “Let's assume she's still alive.”

“She is!”

“I know, Chance.” I do know; I'd feel it in my heart if she was gone. I know she's out there somewhere, and I won't stop until I find her. I need to know why Nevaeh went and why she felt the need to do this. To go to these extremes. Chance is right; she would never willingly put her family through this.

“Tell me everything that happened before she went missing. Did Nevaeh withdraw any money from her account?”

“Fifty thousand dollars over a five-week period. My father called her up on it, but Nevaeh was adamant that she was overspending on stuff she didn't need. Donating money to the shelter she volunteers for. She promised she wouldn't overspend again, and she didn't.”

“Okay. So, let's assume Nevaeh was withdrawing money to use for her getaway. Have you found anything else out? Has she used her passport? Her car?”

“Nothing. Nevaeh's car hasn't moved from the underground garage at her condo. Her passport was still in her dresser, with her driver's license and bank cards. Her chips had been removed from her body, though. I found them beside her cell phone and keys in her condo.”

“You had her inserted with a tracker chip?” I ask, a little disgusted. She's not a fuc.king dog!

“Not by force,” Chance snaps back. “It was for her safety. She's had it since she was a child. She had four of the damn things at my father's request. They weren't meant to keep an eye on her or what she gets up to. But they were inserted in case anything like this ever happened. It's not like some madman couldn't have kidnapped her. We're billionaires, for God's sake! Easy targets for someone wanting a ransom.”

“Has there been a ransom?” I knew the answer before he gave it to me, but I must cover everything.

He shakes his head no in answer to my question. “The cops did the whole CSI thing in her condo. Somebody removed those chips by force, Kirby. They must have known we'd track Nevaeh instantly and find her. They may have wiped the blood up, but there were traces of her blood splattered everywhere. The walls, the units, the bathroom. Her bedroom was apparently the scene of the crime. The cops think she was killed there. Slowly.”

“Shi.t.” I hiss.

What the fuc.k happened to her?

I don't believe Nevaeh is dead, but something terrible happened to her in that house.

But then what if she was alive after what happened, dragged somewhere, and then she died?

No! Don't think like that, Kirby, she's alive. Keep believing it.

“Have they arrested the son of a bitc.h she was dating?”

“Yeah. The cops released him on bail. He can't leave Seattle. So even if he does know Nevaeh is still alive, he can't get to her. That, and my father has a tail on him. Wherever he goes, whatever he does, we'll know about it.”

“At least that's something.”

“But what if she did it to herself?” All eyes turn to Paris. “What if Nevaeh cut the chips out of her body and then spread her blood around the place?”

“What, and then wiped it up? What would the point of that be?”

“She's smart, Kody. She has her father's mind. Nevaeh would know that if she cut herself, spread the blood, and then cleaned it up, it would still be visible to investigators. She's a forensic scientist, for Christ's sake. She made the place look like a murder scene that someone had tried to cover up. Then she left. Some of her things are missing. Some of her clothes and some jewelry that we all know she would never go anywhere without.” Paris continues.

“What if he just buried her with it to look like she left him?”

“Jesus Christ, Kody!” I yell. Stupid pric.k, as if these people don't have enough to worry about! “She's not dead!” I turn my attention back to Chance and his wife. “Has no one come back with anything at all?

“No. And believe me when I say we have thousands of men searching for her. Nevaeh has literally vanished. Of course, everyone is giving up. My father wants me to stop looking for something that isn't there. For me to let Nevaeh be at peace. My own parents believe she's dead.” He scrubs his hands over his face, and I feel for him right now.

“I know it's a long shot, but I'm begging you, Kirby, help me find my sister. Help me find out what happened to her.”

I watch Chance slump down onto the leather chair beside the fire, pulling his wife onto his lap at the same time. She wraps her arms around his shoulders, hugging him to her.

“If anyone can find Nevaeh, you can. I know you're in love with her.”

How in the hell can he know that?

I haven't made it evident to anyone. I know how to keep the damn poker face where my emotions are concerned. I've been doing it for years.

“I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Oh, come on, bro. Everyone knows you're in love with Nevaeh.” I breathe deeply through my nose while pushing my hands into the pockets of my jeans. I'm not comfortable talking about my feelings with anyone. I never have been. “Why couldn't you just have told her years ago?”

“She loves you, too.” I look at Paris. “She's never kept that from Bonnie and me. I don't know what happened between you all those months ago, but Nevaeh was heartbroken when she thought you didn't love her in return. Why couldn't you just tell her?”

I say nothing.

What is there for me to say?

No matter who they are, I will not speak about my feelings with these people.

“If you love her, then find her.” Chance's eyes lock with mine. “If you love Nevaeh. Really love her, then bring her home and show her why you love her. I would rather her be here with you than out there alone.”

“I'll keep you posted.” Is all I say before leaving. I have a lot of planning to do to find Nevaeh. And I will find her. I won't give up until I do.