Stryker

16 - I can't believe I did this!

Coral

I don’t know where to look. I can’t believe I did this here. I can’t believe I told Shepard about Stryker and me. I should have waited for Mark, he said we needed to do this together, but I was having a moment with Shepard, and it just came out.

I have yet to tell Shepard who I’ve been dating, but his stormy eyes tell me that I better tell him right now or else. It’s the “Or else” that’s scaring me right now.

“Who is it, Coral? Which sonofabitch went against me?” Shepard’s voice is so deep, his so tall and built, and he’s fuckin.g scary right now.

I have never been scared of Shepard in my life. He has always been my hero, even when my parents took me away from here, but he’s so angry right now that I’m not sure what he’ll do when I give up Stryker’s name. I don’t want Shepard to hurt Stryker. I know how these things work. It doesn’t matter how strong my man is; if Shepard intends to hurt him over this, Stryker will have no choice but to take it.

Shepard’s eyes soften a little, a slight, warm smile on his face as he lowers his stance. “You don’t need to be afraid of me, Sunflower. You know I would never hurt you.”

“I know you wouldn’t, but I also know what you told your men about coming near me. However, you have to know that we’re in love, Shepard. We have a future, a bright one. I just want to be with him without being scared that you’ll find out and tear us apart.”

“When I give an order to me men, they damn well listen, or they know what’s coming!”

I flinch.

Shepard’s nostrils flare, but I have to tell him the truth. I cannot keep my relationship with Stryker a secret much longer. I won’t. I love him, and I’m not ashamed of him.

“Please don’t hurt him, Number Two, I am begging you. I’ll never ask you for anything else as long as I live if you just don’t hurt him.”

“Tell me who he is.”

I swallow hard, arms folded around my blue shirt-covered chest, and I’m shaking with adrenaline from how scared I am right now.

I should be outside with Stryker and everyone else. But no, I had to come in here and tell Shepard that I’ve been screwing around with one of his men.

What the hell possessed me?

“Tell me, Sunflower. I promise I won’t kill him.”

“But you’ll hurt him?” I ask nervously.

“Depends which fucke.r it is.”

I sigh deeply. I'm going to have to tell him. No matter how long I put it off, there’s no getting out of this. I started this by thinking he’d understand and want me to be happy. But he’s not happy right now, he’s angry and trying to hide it from me.

Regardless, I tell him, “Stryker.”

His eyes widen so much I thought they were going to pop out of his head for a second there. I adjust my blue shirt at the hem, pulling it away from the waistband of my jeans, anything just so that my hands have something to do.

“Stryker?” I nod my head as proudly as I can. “Stryker!?” His voice is getting louder, and I’m shaking in fear. I know what this man is capable of, what they’re all capable of, and it’s only now I realize this was a very bad idea.

I watch as he rakes his fingers through his long dark hair, hair that’s graying at the sides with age. His huge biceps flex with the movement, and I see just how strong this man really is.

“How long, Coral? When did he force you into this?”

“He didn’t force me into anything!” I will not allow him to think that of Stryker. I went into this relationship with both eyes open. “I love him, Shepard!”

“How long?!”

“A couple of months.”

His eyes widen again, chest heaving. I should have told him weeks ago. Now he thinks the worst of both Stryker and me. “I’ll kill him. I’ll fuckin' kill him!” I don’t get the chance to say anything in response because he’s already out the door.

I chase after him, yelling, begging him to calm down, not to hurt the man I love with all that I am. However, my pleas fall on deaf ears as he charges out of BlackJack’s house and out to the backyard where most of the club members are drinking. We came here for a barbecue, for everyone to relax for a while, and I ruined it with my big mouth.

I scream, unable to stop myself as Shepard grabs Stryker from where he stands with some of the others, stunning him, punching him in the face before pinning him to the fence to the left side of the garden.

I can hear the kids of the club screaming, and their mother’s trying to calm them. The kids are not used to seeing this kind of behavior. Shepard never allows it usually. That’s how I know he’s beyond angry, he’s not thinking straight.

My brave man looks at Shepard with no fear in his eyes. He knows what I’ve done and what Shepard is about to do to him, but he says nothing. I don’t even think he’s angry with me for spilling our secret without him there. I guess I’ll find out later if Shepard doesn’t kill him.

BlackJack grabs Taylor’s arm as she attempts to make a move toward the man she calls her son. BlackJack and everyone else here knows that you don’t get involved when the Prez has something he needs to get off his chest. But I can see how badly Taylor wants to ignore her husband and try to stop Shepard.

“You motherfucking son-of-a-b***h!” Shepard’s forearm is against Stryker’s throat, cutting off the oxygen supply to his lungs, and I am so scared that Shepard will kill him. It’s all my fault for not waiting until Stryker was ready to tell Shepard himself. “I warned you what would happen. Didn’t I?!”

Stryker nods, eyes now wide. He can’t breathe!

I won’t wait for that to happen. I won’t wait for the man I see as my second father to kill the only man I have ever loved. The only man who has ever loved me, the man I want to spend my life with, the man who keeps me safe in his big, strong arms. I couldn’t take losing anyone else.

“Please, Number Two, please!” I yell with all my might and emotion. “Please! I love him!”

That snaps Shepard out of it a little because he loosens his grip on Stryker’s throat, allowing him to breathe a little.

Everyone is now staring Stryker down. Not one person had worked it out before now. We were smart enough to keep our relationship on such a down low that now on suspected a thing. BlackJack knew, but that's it. My eyes catch Denise’s for a second. She’s standing with Ice, wrapped in his arms, legs clad in denim, and a leather jacket on her back. She’s pissed that I didn’t tell her about Stryker and me the way she told me about her and Ice. But I don’t give a sh.it right now.

Shepard asks my man, “And you? Do you love her? And you dare fuckin’ tell me yes if you don’t mean it, boy, and I will fuckin’ kill you!”

Stryker rubs his neck for a second, then tells Shepard, “I love her, Prez. I love more than any fuckin’ man ought to love a woman. I didn’t mean to fall for her, dammit, but I did. You have no idea how hard I tried to stay away from her. I know why you're so protective of her, she told me.”

Shepard’s eyes shoot at me. He’s surprised that I’ve told Stryker my story. However, he must know that I would only have done that if I trusted Stryker enough for him to know.

“I would never hurt her or let anybody else hurt her like that. I swear to you, Prez. If you want to beat the shi.t out of me, then go ahead, but you won’t beat what I feel for her out of me.”

“She worth losin’ you place with the club for?”

Oh God! Shepard can’t throw him out of the club. The club is all Stryker knows. Yes, he’ll have me, but I know what the Snakes mean to him. I feel my stomach roll over. I feel sick; this is all so wrong!

But my man shocks the hell out of me by telling Shepard, “She’s worth losing everything for, Prez. The club, my home, my very life. This club is my family. I have been nothing but loyal to every brother in this club. If you tell me there’s no way you’ll let us, be together, then you’ll have to kill me, because I won’t walk away from her, Prez. I can’t. Just as much as you can’t walk away from Lynette.”

Tears are falling from my eyes. This man loves me so much that he’d willingly give up everything to keep me. God knows I’d give my very life for him.

“I love you, Number Two,” I tell Shepard while looking right into his blue eyes. “Please don’t hurt me like this. I love him. I never thought I could love any man like this, not after everything that happened to me, but I do love him. He’s so good to me. I trust him with my life, my heart. Please?”

I look to Stryker. He’s looking at me, and my heart is breaking, I didn’t mean to cause all of this. But his eyes tell me he’s not angry with me for this. He knew it was time. He still loves me as much as he ever did.

“You hurt her once, and I’ll personally cut your balls off.”

Oh, my God! He’s not going to hurt Stryker or me!

“I won’t, Prez, you have my word.”

Screeching, I throw my arms around Shepard’s neck. “I love you, Number Two. You will never know how much.”

“I love you too, Sunflower.” I know that he does, this big, bad biker man.

“Daddy!”

Shepard practically drops me to my feet in shock before racing over to his youngest son, Max, who’s now sobbing in Jett’s arms. “Maxy, where are you hurt?”

“Mamma! Man... Took... Mamma!”

Oh God, No!