Baby Steps

Chapter Six

Bella

I proceed with checking my files, drowning myself in work. Regardless of what happened earlier today, I managed to remain focus onto more important tasks that I didn't realise, it's already eight o'clock. The sun has set and most of the other employees have left to go home. It has always been like this ever since I started working and it's one of the reasons why I think time flies because I seem to be caught up in my own career.

If I go home according to time, I'd have nothing to look forward to. I don't have a family or a partner waiting at home. All I can think about is work—even if I decide to go home early, I'd bring the rest of my work with me and wouldn't even bother to do anything else. My friends would sometimes call me a workaholic but honestly, it's just my way of getting things done as well as passing time especially with my current lifestyle, I spend most of my time alone and in order to not overthink, I drown in work.

It's better than drowning myself in sorrows.

I hear a knock on the door which causes me to turn around, seeing Kate with a big smile plastered on her face as she holds up a paper bag. "I bought Chinese,"

"Ah, just in time." I smile, gesturing for her to come inside.

Kate walks in, placing the paper bag on the coffee table before sitting beside me. "I just knew you'd still be here in your office. You probably haven't eaten your dinner yet, too."

"You know me so well,"

"You can't keep up this behaviour if you plan on keeping the baby,"

I scoff, "Right . . . coming from someone without a child?"

She leans back on the seat before sighing, "Don't underestimate me, Bella. I did my research the soon as I found out about your pregnancy—the girls were talking about it, too. We all know how occupied you are with your work that sometimes you forget how to take good care of yourself."

"I'm doing just fine, Kate. You don't have to worry about me," I smile.

"I know. I know you're doing just fine but we're worried sometimes. You need to do something else as well,"

"Okay, okay, can we stop talking about me and go straight ahead to eat Chinese?" I raise an eyebrow, putting the files aside and making my way towards the packed food. "Oh, wow, I'm really happy you got dumplings."

Kate grins, "I know what you like. So, tell me, how was it?"

I take a bite of the dumpling before sitting nearby, facing her. Honestly, I know exactly what she wants to hear when she asked me that question. She wants to know all about the ultrasound or more precisely, about Adam; whether he showed up or not. That is the thing about Kate, she's very smart in choosing her words. She knows exactly what she wants in her life but she has her own ways, her own tactics of getting there.

"How was what?" I ask, acting confused.

"The lil' buddy in your tummy. Is it doing okay?"

"It's doing fine. For your information, I do plan on keeping the baby—there's nothing holding me back from doing so," I respond before slowly taking another bite.

Sometimes, it feels odd to know that another human being is inside of me. In a matter of months, I'll be delivering another life into this world and it'd change my way of seeing things along the way. There would be different opportunities, different plans and different perceptions—the old Bella would disappear. I can no longer go clubbing or meet random men without thinking of the consequences. I'd have to put my child first and myself second. It'd be hard at first but I know it would come naturally.

"I'm happy to hear that. I support you throughout anything, Bella. If that makes you happy as well, we're all thrilled for you." She makes her way towards me before pulling me in for a hug, "Now . . . I want to ask about Adam,"

"Very unlike you. Straight to the point,"

"You just know how to avoid answering my question."

We laugh, feeling the warmth spreading in my tummy as I lean back. "Adam was there,"

"He made it? Was he late?"

"No, he was just in time. Apparently, he ran all the way from campus?"

Her eyes widen in surprise, "You have got to be shitting me."

"Okay, I don't exactly know if he was from campus. He told me he was nearby but he was sweating and he looked like he was running all the way to the clinic. It just seemed like he was in a rush to get there," I reply, shrugging before taking another dumpling and shoving it into my mouth—ever since I found out I was pregnant, I realised that I'm starting to have a big appetite.

"Maybe, he's just a sweaty guy?"

I groan, shaking my head. "You have got to meet him one day. He's really not what you expect,"

"Oh, believe me. I've met a lot of guys. How different can he be?" Kate sighs, "Besides, he's just a kid . . . not literally but how much can a twenty-year-old impress me?"

"Twenty-one." I correct her.

"Whatever,"

The next few minutes are spent with me ignoring Kate and continuing to eat the rest of the dumplings. I don't know how I'm doing it but blocking Kate's voice from bothering me is just great. All I can think about is Adam and what he's currently doing because his words really did affect me and slowly changing the way I see him.

"Please, don't tell me you like him." Kate interrupts, breaking my thoughts.

"What? Who?"

"Adam! Who else?"

"No, I don't like him. Why should I like him?" I frown.

Here's the truth about this whole confusion. Adam seems like a really great person, he wants to take responsibility and he wants his part in the whole co-parenting journey. He seems genuine when he talks as well and it might take a little bit more time but I'm trying to see if things are going to go well. However, I'm taking full precautions because I don't want to regret anything; especially when this is a big deal for me.

To say that I like Adam, would make me a fool of myself. Besides, I'm not a teenager and I've been through this whole experience in the past—believe me, it wasn't even pretty. I know myself so well to not trust men or more precisely, young guys.

So, to answer to Kate's assumption: no. I don't have feelings for Adam whether it's romantically or anywhere near s****l. Adam and I are somehow stuck in this situation but I'll find ways to make him quit. I'll make him run away, it won't be that hard because the only thing that's going hard . . . is how I'm going to make his life goes.

I will push aside my true personality and attitude because I am going to make him suffer, make him regret his decision on ever wanting to be a part of our child's life. He'd be upset and might even give up before he can even make it halfway. By that time, I'd know for sure he's going to walk away.

Adam is not going to expect what is going happen.

I'll make sure he leaves.