Her revengeful Bastard

The language of parasols

*Kai*

Everyone who wants to be seen is in Holloway Park. Generally I prefer to do my business in the shadows, but I recognize there are times when a man needs to step into the sunlight in order to be effective and gain what he wants. This afternoon is one of those times.

Sitting astride my gelding gives me a clearer view, and it doesn’t take me long to spy Miss Anna. I expected to find her amid a group of giggling females. Instead she appears to be alone, except for the entourage of servants who had been accompanying her yesterday. Not wanting to appear overly eager, I didn’t join her at the park yesterday. Seduction requires subtlety and patience. Especially when the woman is supposedly enamored of another.

I don’t cut a direct path to her, but instead meander about, tipping my head whenever any man with whom I might have done business acknowledges me. It is only a few to be honest, but that will change once my place within high Society is recognized. Once my rank is established, Lea’s will be as well. Ever since I had learned at the age of fourteen that my mum was with child, I had put all my efforts into protecting her and the baby. It was only then I had fully understood the price Mae Tempest was paying to the landlord every damn monday when she didn’t have enough coins for her weekly rent. If I had been older or bigger or stronger, perhaps I could have protected her from the predatory man sooner, with my fists.

I damn well protect her now … and the daughter to whom she has given birth out of wedlock, in shame and in sin. When it comes to children, the law requires nothing of the man and everything of the woman. Mae Tempest had little to give except for her heart, but it was enough, enough for her own daughter and the five unwanted children she had taken under her wing. I owe my mum a price I can never repay, so I will make a proper place in the world for her daughter, her blood, even if it costs me my soul to do it.

I know the moment Miss Anna spots me. She stops walking, tips up her parasol slightly along with her chin and smiles softly as though she has been kept indoors all day because of the rain … and the sun has suddenly made an appearance.

Drawing my horse to a halt, I dismount with ease and wait for a more public acknowledgment from her.

“Mr. Tempest”. She sounds almost happy.

“Miss Anna, what a pleasure it is to find you in the park this afternoon”. I grant her a smile.

She looks me in the eyes. “And you, sir. I thought I might have seen you yesterday”.

What a bold chit she is. I didn't expect the subtle reprimand. “I had business that kept me away”. I cast a furtive glance at the servants hovering nearby, all appearing to be ready to pounce if I make an inappropriate movement. I resettle my gaze on Anna. “But you occupied my thoughts”.

A lovely blush rises up her neck to paint her face and make her cheeks more pronounced. I have the fleeting thought that I am looking forward to discovering if the flush begins at her toes. And I will discover it. Before the month is done, I intend to have her in my bed. She will be to me whatever the woman who had given birth to me had been to my father … and I will throw the similarities into the Alpha’s face. Looking at her youth and innocence now, I refuse to feel remorseful about the role she will play in me gaining satisfaction. I have given the Alpha the opportunity to publicly recognize me, and the damned man ignored each missive except one.

“Might we stroll together for a while ?” I ask.

Her blush deepens, but she looks slightly uncomfortable as though uncertain where to go from here. She gives a barely perceptible nod. “I suppose there’s no harm in walking together for a few minutes”.

Guilt nags at me. Am I a blackguard for using a girl who seems far too innocent to be out alone among the wolves ? I don’t bother to offer my arm, because I am not certain she will take it, and I never take any action unless I am certain of the outcome. In a distant corner of my mind, an irritating thought pokes at me that I also haven’t offered my arm because I would be distracted by her touch. She has small hands, no doubt fragile and delicate. There has never been anything gentle in my life. Everything I experienced has been hard, harsh and challenging. Even when I take a woman to my bed it has a rough, wild element to it. The women I take are strong, fierce, and give as good as they get. I can’t imagine dainty Miss Anna on all fours acting the mare to my stallion.

Damnation. She isn’t even touching me, but simply gazing at her distracts me from my purpose. I walk with my hands clasped tightly behind my back, the reins held firmly as the gelding follows, providing an effective barrier between Anna and her make servants who follows along behind. While I walk to her left, the two maids have taken up positions to her right, but they are keeping a respectful distance, allowing us a bit of privacy as long as we speak quietly.

“Did you find a parasol for your sister ?” Anna asks, as she glances at me.

“I did. A white lacy thing. She seemed to fancy it”. I admit.

She smiles softly. “White goes with anything”.

Only then I notice her pink parasol, resting against her right shoulder, it is the same shade as her dress. She no doubt possesses a hundred of the blasted things, one for every outfit. She lives in a world where coins are taken for granted. While I am now in a position to be generous with mine, I never forget the price paid for each one.

Silence eases in around us. I suppose she is waiting for me to continue our discussion of ladies’ equipment. Flirtation involves speaking of inconsequential things. If I have any hope at all of seducing her, I need to move quickly before the Alpha or his son realizes my intentions.

“How many languages do you speak ?” She asks, catching me off guard with the change in topic. Is she trying to discern where I have been educated ? The rookeries had been my classroom, poverty and vulnerability, my harsh tutors. I had learned their lessons well. They will never again threaten to break me.

“Just English.” I can speak a few words of other languages, enough to communicate with laborers when needed, but mentioning them might put her in the mood to test me, and I am not going to show myself lacking in any regard. Although I have never seen the advantage of boasting. Better to keep one’s talents close to the vest. “You ?”

“Five”. She says blithely. “English, of course. French. Handkerchief, fan and parasol”.

I stare at the impish smile she gives me. It transforms her face into rare beauty, something that goes beyond the surface. I have no desire to be intrigued or mesmerized by her teasing … no one dares tease me … yet she seems completely unaware of the danger I present . “I beg your pardon ? Handkerchief, fan, parasol ?”

“Any she-wolf of good breeding knows them. Did you not teach them to your sister when you gifted her with the parasol ?” She innocently asks.

“I am not a she-wolf of good breeding”. I point out.

Her smile deepes, causing a strange sensation in my chest, something I have only experienced once when a large wooden crate toppled onto me. It had been terribly unpleasant, then. It isn’t much so now, and yet I still find it difficult to breathe. “No, I suppose you’re not. Do you see that couple walking over there, the lady in the purple dress and the guy with the gray shirt ? Her parasol rests against her left shoulder. She is displeased with him. He has said something that upset her”.

“Perhaps it keeps the sun out of her eyes better on that side”. I suggest.

She laughs lightly. “My dear sir, carrying a parasol has little to do with the sun”.

Dear sir ? I am not her dear anything. I know that, and I know she doesn’t understand the consequences of words spoken. Still the endearment leaves a strange longing that I do not wish to examine. I am thirty one, reaching the time in my life when it would be natural to take a wife, to have someone who calls me dear. I have never really contemplated that before, don’t know why I am doing so now. She is not to be a permanent part of my life. She serves a purpose, and when that purpose has been reached, I will release her. I wonder why I suddenly fear I might do so with regrets.

“Do you see the woman in blue who has folded up her parasol and is touching the handle to her lips ?” She asks.

“The one who has wasted her coins by purchasing something designed to protect from the sun and is using it most ineffectually ?” I nod.

He giggles softly. “Depends on your definition of effectual, I suppose. She is signaling to the man walking beside her that she would like to kiss him”.

“You’re bloody well putting me on, aren’t you ?” I stare at her.

Her eyes widen at my sharp tone, or perhaps my profanity, but I hate little more than I hate being made a fool of. She shakes her head. “No. Women aren’t allowed to speak their minds, to declare what they want, so they have to do it through bits of frippery, it’s sad really”.

Her voice is edged with a hardness I didn’t expect of her. I don’t know why it pleases me to realize she has a bit of a temper, one that she no doubt controls because of societal expectations. “And what is it you want to declare ?”

She blinks slowly, stares at me, then she suddenly laughs. “At this precise moment, I don’t know”.

“You never have to watch your words with me”. Which isn’t fair, as I have always been watchful of what I revealed to her. “My sisters always speak their minds”.

“And do what they want, I suppose. The sister who accompanied you the other night no doubt was allowed to stay at The Gardens after the real fun began”. She says with a sigh.

I shake my head. “No, I strive to protect her from the less savory elements of the world”

“My apologies”. She sighs. “Sometimes I yearn to rebel against proper behavior”.

“Why don’t you ?” I ask.

She shakes her head. “Scandal would serve me no good. Kyle would be dismayed and disappointed in me”.

I find it difficult to believe anyone would ever be disappointed in her, that she has it within her to bring about censure … on her own at least. With my assistance, she is going to find herself engulfed in improper behavior. She will be disappointed. She will bring about censure. She will despise me. Regret begins to well, and I shove it aside. It can overwhelm me later, but not now, not while my plans are still in their infancy, before they will come to fruition.

“Why is he not here ?” I ask, working to keep my voice neutral, when in truth there is a small corner of my soul that is angry on her behalf, because unlike the myriad of other women, she is not being escorted by her man.

She gives a small shrug. “The park bores him no end”.

“But surely you do not. I would suffer through any dull activity to be at the side of a woman who interests me”. And she interests me, far more than she should have, far more than I want her to.

That blush again, accompanied by a fluttering of her eyelashes that I suspect has nothing at all to do with flirtation, but rather my words has taken her unawares, as she has not considered the message a man’s absence might be communicating. While I have given it a great deal of thought. If she doesn’t mean as much to Kyle as the gossip sheets hints, then she is no longer a crucial part of my plan. For some unfathomable reason, I am more disappointed on her behalf than on mine.

“It seems a woman would be most fortunate to have your attention, then”. She averts her gaze, releasing a taut laugh. “It seems our couple with the closed parasol has secreted away”.

“Have you ever been secreted away ?” I can’t help but ask.

She snaps her gaze back to me. “Of course not. A she-wolf in my position does not engage in such inappropriate behavior, but must act in a manner that ensures she stays above rumor mongering”.

“Is there not some part of you, some deep, dark part of you, that longs for a bit of scandal ?” I send her my most cheeky grin.

I watch in fascination as the delicate muscles at her ivory throat work while she swallows. “Absolutely not” .There is little force behind the words. “I have delayed your enjoyment of the park long enough, I think”.

She is dismissing me. I should have taken offense. Instead I view it as a victory. I am getting to her, making her doubt Kyle’s devotion. I wonder why I take no satisfaction in the knowledge.

“Indeed”. I bow my head slightly. “I have a meeting with my lawyer regarding some new property I wish to obtain. He charges me double when I’m late”.

She gives me a short nod. “Then I shan’t keep you”.

“One question before I go … what does it signal when a woman rests her parasol on her right shoulder ?” As she has done throughout our entire stroll.

“That she welcomes the gentleman speaking to her”. She answers.

I look at the parasol. “Quite innocent, then”.

“I suppose it depends upon what she welcomes him speaking to her about”. She gives me a small, curious glance.

I chuckle low. “I suppose it does”. I give an elegant bow. “It has been my pleasure to spend a few minutes with you, Miss Anna. I do hope our paths will cross again”.

“I’m not certain that would be wise”. She mumbles.

“Sometimes a man gains more by being unwise”. Before she can respond, I mount my horse, tip my head to her and take off at a gentle canter.

She is not as I had expected. I do want to cross paths with her again, and it has little do with reprisal. The thought makes me uncomfortable, I shift in the saddle and spur my horse on. If I was a smart man, I would cast aside this part of my plan. But then I have already admitted to finding profit in not always being wise.