Prologue

1629 Words
"Dad, I'd rather chew my own left fingers than go for the reunion." Alfie Allred protested. He picks up his cup of tea from the table with his free hand and takes a sip as he listens to his father speak from the phone. "You have gone for the past years, Alfie. Don't you want to catch up with your past classmates? I thought you had friends in high school or is there something you're not telling me or did not tell me?" Daniel Allred asks his son, there a tinge in his voice that Alfie can't place. "Is it because of Cri-" "Dad! You promised!" Alfie hissed as he pushes the still full cup of tea away from him. He walks out of the kitchen and makes his way to his sitting room, he takes a seat on the couch and grabs the remote. He knows it's been years since he graduated from BrentField High school. He also knows there are people out there who would agree with him when he says his days at high school were not his favorite. In fact, he does his best to avoid thinking about that period. "I just- you don't have to go if you don't want to. I thought it'd be fun if you see your classmates again. I remember when you were at BrentField, you were always laughing and smiling until your senior year." Daniel quaked. "I just wanted you to have fun with them one more time." Alfie falls silent as his father spoke. He wants to tell his father what exactly had happened during his senior year, what exactly had caused his gelotophobia but he doesn't want to remember. He'd feel their stares, hear their laughter all over again. Even thinking about it made him shudder. "What if I tell you I'd think about it?" Alfie bargains, hoping his dad would accept it and not press on the matter. He plays with the remote in his hand as he listens to his dad talk. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I know it's somewhat of a sore subject, even if I don't know why." "Dad... can we talk about something else?" Alfie asks as he presses the power button on the remote and the television flicks to life. He immediately presses the mute button and proceeds to flip through channels. "How's work going?" "The circus has a show next week Saturday. I'll send you a ticket." Alfie tells his dad just as he settles on watching Ridiculousness on MTV. It's been three years since he joined The Blackborne Circus as a trapeze artist. It was the only place that he had felt comfortable in his own skin and also the same place that makes his fear shrink backwards. He doesn't expect people to laugh as he folds himself into his hoop, instead he bathes in the round of applause he gets. He loves the attention he gets as he hangs onto the silver hoop by his knees and sings. He's a different person on the hoop but immediately his feet touches the floor, he's a bumbling, clumsy mess who has a fear of people laughing at him. He's thankful to God for giving him a dad who was supportive, who didn't judge or tell him he was a disappointment, a waste of years and years of school fees. "Yes!" Daniel cheers. "Your circus always has something new to look forward to." "Dad..." "Yes, pookie?" Dan replies. Alfie scrunched up his nose. "I thought we agreed not to call me that again." Alfie begs. "No, you ranted, I listened but I didn't not agree." Daniel sings and Alfie pouts. "What did you want to tell me?" Alfie sighs and lies down on the couch, his phone pressed to his ear as his eyes remain on the television. "Are you disappointed?" "Disappointed about what?" "Disappointed in me." Alfie blurts, his cheeks turning pink. "That I'm not using my degree after you s-" "Alfie Pookie Allred, you aren't a disappointment. I am so proud of you that it is unbelievable. I was so worried about you before you found a home in Blackborne. You never smiled as much as you do now and it frightened me to a degree. At first I thought it was my fault but, now, I realize you never found a place anywhere else never felt comfortable anywhere else. Seeing you sing and watching you dance with and manipulate your hoop, seeing you twist and spin always makes me so happy because you look happy right there. You seem confident in yourself, you look unbelievably happy." "Dad..." "Hush you, you will never be a disappointment, I can assure of you of that." "Thank you, dad. I needed to hear that." "Good. Have you eaten? Is Arjun awake yet?" At the mention of his roommate's name, Alfie looks towards Arjun's door. Arjun Gupta has been his roommate for two years, his best friend for four. Since Alfie was a thoroughly clean person, the house remained in tip top shape. The floors were cleaned, the counters glistering and the house sort-of permanently smelt like sugar due to the amount of sugar scented candles Alfie has around the house. "He had a night shift and today is his day off. Let him sleep, dad." "He can sleep but he also has to eat! I don't mean pizza either, too much of that s**t isn't good for you." Alfie rolls his eyes as his dad continued to ramble on about greasy food and too much cheese. Alfie mentally chuckles as his dad complains about Alfie eating burgers for lunch every day. He's forced to speak up when his father threatens to cook, pack to and send it to him. "Dad, you don't have to. You taught me how to cook, remember?" "Fine but I'll send you some recipes I found online yesterday." "Thank you, pop." "Has he said his prayers this morning?" "Yup but he fell asleep immediately after drinking a bottle of water." They talk for a little while longer before Daniel bids his son goodbye. The call ends and Alfie doesn't move. He's too tired and he needs tea and maybe two chocolate chip muffins but he just couldn't find the strength to stand up. Just as he flips on the kettle in the kitchen, Arjun walks out of his room, he looked fresh out of the shower and he was dressed in a white shirt and his boxers, his hair stretching out in all directions. "Can't sleep?" Alfie asks as he watches Arjun fall onto the couch like a potato. "I think I need a cuddle." "How about tea and some of the brownies I bought from Gregg's?" Arjun groans and Alfie laughs as his friends waved his hands in glee. He pulls down an extra mug and drops a tea bag in it. It doesn't take long for the kettle to flip off, he pours the water into the cup and waits till it was dark. He adds a teaspoon of sugar in each cup and places a couple of brownies onto a saucer. He places the two mugs of tea on the tray as well as the brownies. He finds Arjun lying down on the ground, staring at the tv with a small smile on his face as a man walks straight into a glass door. "Thank you. I really needed this." Arjun says as he tries to sit up. It takes a couple of attempts to Alfie's amusement. When he finally sits up, he rests against the edge of the sofa. "Dad called. He asked about you." "I know. He texted me last night, telling me about a high school reunion thing going on this weekend." Alfie sighs and drops his gaze from the tv to his cup of hot tea. He should have known his dad would do something like this. He takes a long sip of his tea as he gathers the strength to look at his best friend. Arjun was already looking at him, his brows pinched with worry and his still hot cup of tea in his hand. "I know that place holds your most painful memories but I don't want you to forget the beautiful ones that were made there too." Arjun says. He places his free hand on Alfie's thigh and looks him in the eye as he speaks. "You found something there, something that should not be forgotten. Something that was beautiful to you. Don't forget that." Alfie doesn't reply, instead he takes a sip of his tea and a bite of the brownies. He has a lot to say on this matter but he doesn't know how to formulate the word, deliver them exactly as he feels. He has never been good at that. He takes another sip of his tea, his eyes still set on the television just as someone jumps off the roof and onto a trampoline. "Ouch!" Arjun winced, his eyes squeezing shut for a second. "I wonder if you can try that." Alfie blurts before he can stop himself. He glances at his friend and finds Arjun smiling at him already. Knowing Arjun like the back of his hand, he knows that he's about to talk about the reunion again, so he settles for trying to placate Arjun with the same thing he had said to his dad. "I'll think about it." "If you want, I can go with you." Alfie raises a brow in question as he stared at his friend. "You'd really go with me?" "I want to. I want to know the faces of those people who put this fear of laughter in you. I want to be there when they see what a great person you are."
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