Opposing Affair

Chapter 9: Gender Roles

Ramello

Damn it! I almost told her I love her. This affair has gone too far. What the hell is wrong with me? I pace the confines of my office, the weight of my decisions presses down heavily. I’m a leader—always have been, but my feelings for Julianna have tangled everything up inside my head. The lines between love and duty blur as I wrestle with my beliefs about leadership, relationships, and her place in my life. A knock at the door interrupts my thoughts, and Grace steps in, clipboard in hand, her face set in a determined expression.

“You’re due at the studio for the debate in an hour,” she says.

Today is the debate about gender equality in politics. I know for the past week, I’ve distanced myself from Julianna, offering nothing more than the occasional small talk when we're alone. I know it hurts her. I can see the hurt she tries to hide from me, but I can’t bring myself to risk the campaign by giving in to my feelings. I nod but remain silent, my mind still in clouds of insecurity. An hour later, the bright studio lights bear down on us, and the audience settles into hushed anticipation. Julianna stands across from me, looking beautiful in white slacks that fit perfectly to her body. The matching blazer with two gold buttons hung open showing off a royal blue fitted blouse. Her eyes are searching mine for the warmth she used to find there, but I keep my gaze cold and distant, shielding my heart behind the facade of a political opponent.

The moderator asks a pointed question about gender equality in politics. I meet Julianna’s gaze directly, and my words come out more harshly than intended. “I believe there is a reason why society emphasizes the roles on male and female in any industry. Let’s take Ms. Daniels for example. While your intentions may be admirable, we cannot allow emotions to cloud decision-making. We need a leader focused on practical solutions, not personal ambitions.”

I see a flash of pain cross her face, quickly replaced by a spark of fire.

She fires back, her voice unwavering. “And who are you to judge what is practical, Mr. Rhodes? A true leader empowers others to reach their full potential, regardless of gender or background. That’s not just personal for me, but for many others who have to work twice as hard to get respect and recognition. I won’t apologize for advocating for what's right for our people. As far as emotions, as intuitive and consistent as your beliefs may be, there are reasons to take them with a grain of salt. You know, I’ve taken a few psychology courses in college and what I remember is that men who believe in behaving traditionally masculine are more likely to engage in risky behavior.” Was she referring to our affair? Yes, I initiated it, but she could've said no. Was she going to confess on national television? My heart rate quickens as she glares at me before continuing.

“Take Tom Harrison for example, he tried to use my past to justify his reasons of why he thinks I'm not suitable to run this country. It was risky, tasteless, and obviously it didn’t work.” The room buzzes with murmurs, the tension you thick. But I hold firm, maintaining the facade that the public expects, although her words cut deep. After the debate, Julianna tries to approach me backstage, her expression is grim. But before she can say a word, I walk away, refusing to let her see how much I’m unraveling inside.

Back in my office, Grace shuts the door behind her, crossing her arms as she watches me.

“What’s going on with you, Ramello?”

I glance up from my notes, not meeting her eyes. “Nothing.”

“Don’t lie to me. I saw you and Julianna staring at each other after the debate. Is something going on between you two?”

A long silence stretches between us, and I finally admit, “We're having an affair.” There was no use in hiding the truth from her.

Her eyes widen, and she lets out a breath, shaking her head. “Ramello, this could destroy your campaign.”

“I know,” I reply, leaning back in my chair. “That’s why I’m trying to distance myself.”

She steps forward, her expression softening. “But are you in love with her?”

I hesitate, the words sticking in my throat before I finally nod. “Yes I am, but I don’t know what to do.”

Grace exhales deeply, setting down her tablet. “Reach out to her, Ramello. Apologize for the way you humiliated her. I’ve been in her position, and it’s hard enough without a colleague tearing you down.”

I exhale a breath, mulling over her advice. Grace has a point. If I’m serious about this, I need to make things right.

She stands and grabs her tablet. “And for the record, if you weren’t my friend, I would’ve slap the dog s**t out of you for her. That stigma of women being emotional is bullshit.” I smile at her words and, honestly, I wouldn’t blame her. The next day, I use my phone to send a message to Julianna, carefully choosing my words. I admit that my actions were harsh and offer my apology for the way I judged her role in politics. I suggest we talk, not as rivals or because of our affair, but as people who understand the struggle of navigating this path. It’s a risk, but I know I must try. As I press send, I hope it's not too late to mend what I’ve broken.

Hours turn to days as I wait for a response from Julianna. But nothing comes. My phone remains stubbornly silent, and with each passing hour, I become more restless. I can't help but wonder just how angry she is with me after my harsh words. She has every right to be, but the silence is becoming unbearable. I try to reach out again, calling and leaving a message, but she doesn't respond. I hope that maybe she just needs time to think it over, to process things. Even so, the uncertainty gnaws at me. To distract myself, I check the latest polls. Julianna is in the lead by twenty points. The gap between us widens, but strangely, instead of feeling resentment, I feel an unexpected sense of pride. She's defying the odds stacked against her, pushing through the noise that’s made about her.

A part of me always knew she had it in her—the fire, the determination, the ability to rally people behind her vision. I should feel more threatened by her success, but I can't. Instead, I'm proud. But she needs to hear me out. The longer this silence stretches, the more I realize just how deeply I’ve hurt her. I owe her a sincere, face-to-face apology, something that goes beyond texts or voicemails. I grab my coat and head for the door, determination driving each step as I make my way to the car. My driver nods at me while opening the door for me to get in. I won’t let another day go by without speaking to her. She deserves to know the truth about how I feel and to hear my apology in person. This time, I won't walk away.

I step out into the crisp night air, my breath visible in the glow of streetlights as I head toward Julianna's campaign headquarters. Determined not to let my nerves undermine this, I press forward, replaying my words in my head, preparing to say what she needs to hear. When I arrive, the building is quiet, and I question if she’s even here. Maybe she made a point when she said that men who believe in behaving traditionally masculine are more likely to engage in risky behavior. I’m here risking my entire campaign just for her to hear my apology. As I approach the door, Cassie’s eyes widened at me before opening the door, slightly.

“Senator Rhodes, it's a surprise to see you here. What brings you by?”

“I wanted to speak with Senator Daniels about the education reform.”

She arches a brow. “At this time of night.”

“Yes, its urgent.”

She hesitates before opening the door for me. “She’s in her office.” I thank her and attempt to walk away.

“Senator, I know that there’s something going on between you two. Your words at the last debate were clear in that. Just know that she worked extremely hard to overcome the challenges that tried to stop her. I'm not speaking as her campaign manager, but I am speaking as her friend. Pull some s**t like that again and you’ll have to deal with me.”

“I understand,” I nod.

Her office door is shut, and I hesitate before knocking, my heartbeat quickening.

A muffled voice responds, “Come in.”

I open the door to find Julianna at her desk, poring over notes and charts, looking beautiful with her dark hair straightened, stopping just past her shoulders. She looks up, and her eyes meet mine. Surprise flickers across her face, and then her expression shifts to one of guarded calm.

“Ramello,” she says carefully, setting her papers aside. “What are you doing here?”

I close the door behind me and step forward. “Julianna, I wanted to apologize.”

She crosses her arms, her gaze cool but curious. “For what, specifically?”

“For how I spoke to you during the debate, and for the way I’ve been treating you,” I say, my voice steady. “I judged you unfairly, and I let my emotions get the best of me. I was wrong.”

She watches me carefully, her expression unyielding. “Emotions? I thought only women had emotion. Why now?”

“Because I needed to understand what you’ve been fighting for,” I reply. “And because I’m proud of you, Julianna. I’ve seen the way you’ve defied the odds, the courage you show every day, and it’s made me realize that I can’t keep pretending we’re just opponents.”

She uncrosses her arms, her posture softening slightly. “Ramello, you can't just say things like that and expect everything to be fine.”

“I know,” I say, taking a step closer. “But I’m not here to change your mind or ask for forgiveness right away. I’m here to say that I’m sorry and I value your strength, your intelligence, and your passion. I should have told you that sooner.”

A long silence stretches between us, and I can see the gears turning in her mind. Finally, she speaks, her voice softer.

“Ramello, I can't deny how much you hurt me. But I do appreciate your honesty.”

I smile, “Thank you.”

“Now I have work to do. So, you can leave.” I want to push, but I don’t want to press my luck. She didn’t say that she forgave me, but at least we spoke. I left her office feeling a little better, but I knew Julianna wasn’t going to make it easy for me.