Lust or Mate?

Chapter 13 - Desires

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Alafia/Fifi

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I turned to my side and opened my eyes, noticing that it was morning and Alexi was asleep. I needed to go to the bathroom, so I carefully released myself from his hold, trying not to wake him. As I got out of bed, I winced at the tenderness between my legs.

Alexi had a nightmare this morning, shortly after we fell asleep, and I felt sorry for him because it seemed quite intense. A smile crept onto my face as I reminisced about last night's events and I stood in front of the mirror, taking in my disheveled appearance, before my eyes trailed to the hickeys on my neck.

Alexi was my first, but I already knew no one could compare to him. Just thinking about last night made my stomach flutter and filled me with excitement. After freshening up and fixing my hair, I headed out of the room but paused when I noticed an interesting clear box in the corner of the bathroom cabinet. I walked back and picked it up, noticing that it contained contact lenses.

"Does he wear contacts?" I whispered, recalling the blue of his eyes that turned black during our passionate moments. I also thought about his age and remembered feeling his canines scraping against my marking spot last night. If I had my wolf, I would be able to sense if he had his wolf already, but now I can't.

I placed the box back and left, not wanting him to find me with his things, as he might think I was snooping, and that wouldn't be sexy. I made my way toward the bed, a smile stretching across my face again as I looked at his sleeping form. However, I wasn't sleepy anymore, and I had a test to study for later in the day. So, I decided to go to the kitchen and prepare breakfast for him, thinking about how unsettled he appeared after his nightmare.

I wondered if the loss of his nanny in such a brutal way had something to do with it and if the thought of her daughter, whom he believed could be dead, was also causing him distress. I didn't know Alexi that well, but our conversation last night after we made love showed me that he had a kind and caring heart, and I fell even more for him.

As we drifted off to sleep, my mother's words echoed in my mind. She warned me about the dangers of not waiting for my mate when we spoke, and I expressed my belief that it was unfair for she-wolves to be judged when exploring relationships with humans or even other wolves, while males were not.

I asked her if my father was her first, and she said no. I also asked if she was my father's first, and again, she said no. I inquired if they had faced any problems because of that, and she said no, but it could still happen. When she said that, I felt like she didn't believe in me, as if she still saw me as an incapable child unable to make decisions and take responsibility for my own life.

I asked her if Aunt Veil was Uncle Linton's first, and vice versa, and with Aunt Veil, their situation was different. Uncle Linton waited, but Aunt Veil never did, and yet they were happy. I told myself I was going to do me. But last night, in Alexi's arms, I realized it would hurt me if he found his mate here, and I started to think that maybe I should have heeded my mother's warning and waited. I didn't expect to feel the way I did about him, but I couldn't help it.

When we touched, it felt right, like our connection went way beyond flesh desires. Then, crazy thoughts started running through my mind and I started asking myself, "What if he was my mate?" But I shoved the thoughts to the back of my mind again, scared that they might turn into hope—hope I couldn't afford to have. It was crazy since I barely knew the guy, but I wished he was my mate.

I entered his kitchen and headed for the fridge. Unlike Lex and me, it looked as though he had done his groceries. I took some eggs and cheese out before taking out the veggies and cutting them. I didn't know what he liked, but I loved omelets and decided to make that for him.

I headed to the coffee maker while at it and started brewing coffee. The scary nightmare he had of a woman with a snake wrapped around her came to mind again, and I shivered. It was creepy. No wonder he looked the way he did. I woke up to movements on the bed, and when I opened my eyes, he was sitting up and writhing like something was wrapped around him. Just as I opened my mouth to call out to him, he screamed. His body was burning hot when I held him. We held each other for a long time before he was ready to try and get some sleep again.

"So this is where you escaped to," a raspy voice spoke toward the entrance, snapping me out of the scary thoughts and I looked up to see Alexi enter with that smile that brightens my whole world.

"I hope you don't mind," I said as he walked up and pulled me into a hug, and he said he could never.

"Good morning," he said, pulling back from the hug and cupping my face before leaning in and connecting our lips while I whispered good morning back. He walked to the fridge when we broke the kiss, telling me what I was making smelled good. I told him I hoped he liked an omelet, and he said he loved it, throwing the bottle of water in the dustbin. After that, he walked up to me, and I asked him to sit down, serving him.

"Thank you," he said, and I poured him some coffee. I poured some for myself too, and we sat down together. He complimented the breakfast, and I thanked him. We ate in silence for a moment before I spoke up, deciding to ask the question that had been on my mind since our first encounter.

"Alexi," I called him, causing him to respond by looking up at me again. "Have you gotten your wolf?" I asked, and he said no. "You are eighteen?" I added, and he said yes before asking what was wrong, noticing the frown I didn't mean to show as I recalled his canines that I felt elongate last night. Maybe I was mistaken, considering I wasn't sober when I felt them.

I didn't want to mention the canines, so I asked him if he wore contact lenses. He nodded before saying he had problems with his eyes. I told him I was sorry and that at least he only had two years left before he had his wolf, and all his eye problems would be over. He nodded, agreeing, before thanking me. When we finished breakfast, he helped me clean up, and I got dressed, taking off his slippers that I had been wearing since I walked in here barefoot. But he said I could wear them. He walked me back to my room.

When we got to the room, he asked if I was doing anything this afternoon and I had a test to study for, but I told him no, I would just study in the evening. He asked if he could take me out to a movie to make up for not coming to the club, and while I wanted to go, I told him he didn’t have to make it up to me. I knew what he was going through, but he said he wanted to. I couldn’t say no because, deep down inside, I was hoping he would insist. We shared a hug, and he pulled me into the sweetest kiss that had me swooning after that, surprising me since there were students around going about their business.

"Later, then. I will pick you up," he said with the sexiest smile. I whispered back that I would see him later, and reached for the keypad, a blushing mess, before turning to look at him again as I entered.

He turned in that moment too, and I didn’t think I could become any redder, but I did, waving back at him. But just then, I felt eyes on me and I looked across the hall to see Gyda, who smiled and waved at me.

I waved at her back, and the elevator closed. Lex was not back, and I already had breakfast, but I could have done with a bath. I was sore. I headed towards the bathroom and ran a bath for myself. I took my clothes off and sank into the warm water, moaning as I did, feeling absolute bliss, but the feeling didn’t last long as the door burst open to reveal a worried Lex.

"What’s wrong?" I asked as she greeted me, forcing a smile. She said someone had been robbing Avery. "What do you mean?" I asked, sitting upright, and she said Avery’s dad called this morning and told him that his card was used again.

"Last year, Avery discovered that his card was used by someone else after his father confronted him about the medications that were going off his card. Avery had no idea, and the card was used at the pharmacy across the street. It was obvious that it was one of the students here on campus because most of the time it was used, Avery was here on campus.

They requested footage, but they were told the place deleted the footage after seven days, and seven days had passed when they discovered the transactions. Avery suspected some guys he hung out with who were not students last year since he trusted Lake and Azarios. But now the person did it again last Sunday. I asked if he went to the place to request the footage, and she said he was about to go there now with Lake and Azarios.

"That’s bad," I muttered, and she said it was before adding that they were going to catch a movie this afternoon and asking if I wanted to tag along. I told her that Alexi and I were also going, adding that I would ask Alexi what time and that maybe we could go together. She smiled, muttering cool before asking what happened here last night, the smile turning into a knowing one.

"Oh, my God. That's the reason you are soaking right now, isn't it?" She asked and screamed when I nodded before she demanded that I tell her everything.

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Alexi

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"Good morning or good afternoon," my brother said as he walked into my room, and I greeted him in return. He commented that I looked tired, and I told him that I indeed felt tired, which was strange. I felt like I needed more sleep. He mentioned that he had come into my room in the morning, but I was sleeping. The look on his face made me realize that he had seen Fifi and I informed him that she had come over last night because she was worried after our phone conversation earlier.

"She could tell that I wasn't okay," I added, and he said it was sweet of her, which I agreed with. He started to say something else, but I interrupted him, telling him I thought she was my mate. This made him sit down next to me.

"The things I feel when I'm with her, man. It shouldn't be possible to feel that way with just anyone. The sparks, her scent that messes with my head, how perfect it feels when we make love... everything," I told him everything and he reminded me that this was the first time I was having s*x on my own terms, with someone I had chosen, outside of the environment I was used to. He asked if this wasn't making me feel things that weren't there, and I told him it was much more than that.

Deep down, it felt like there was something more, and I believed she felt it too. He asked me what I wanted to do, but there was nothing I could do. I would have to wait until she got her wolf to know for certain. I couldn't tell her something I wasn't sure about. Besides, it's not like either of us were going anywhere. Whatever it was that we were doing, we would do it together until we figured it out. She was the only girl I had eyes for now, and something told me she felt the same way.

My brother headed to the kitchen to make himself breakfast, and I followed him, telling him about this weird dream I had last night. But just as I began, the doorbell rang. I told him I would get it and walked toward it but I froze halfway when a strong scent wafted towards me, engulfing my senses. It was the most captivating, intoxicating scent I had ever encountered, leaving me momentarily breathless. The realization struck me like a lightning bolt, and my knees felt weak as my mind raced.

My hands trembled as I reached for the door handle, and my breath caught in my throat when the door swung open to reveal the last person I ever expected, while a voice in my head whispered, the last thing I ever expected to hear like this, with her.

"Mate."