My Only Regret

No one’s P.O.V. “You are the murderer. You killed her. This is just because of you that she is lying dead here,” he screamed at me while holding the dead body of that girl who had just died in front of us out of the blue. Tears were streaming down my eyes, but I was dumbfounded. “You forced her to this extent….. You are the one to be blamed here….. this happened just because of you…. You should die…. You should also die”, his screaming was still lingering in my mind. His eyes, which had gentleness and love a few minutes ago, now had pure hatred for me. This was stabbing my heart mercilessly, and I felt breathless. It was supposed to be the best day of my life, but it became the worst day of my life. Nothing can soothe my aching heart right now. I just kept staring at him, not knowing what to do or what to say to him. He was crying bitterly while holding her tightly in his embrace. He blamed me for everything that happened today. The humiliation, the hatred, and the pity that I saw in everyone’s eyes were beyond my tolerance. Everything was now pitch-dark in front of my eyes. I opened my eyes slowly to get rid of this darkness and looked at the vast sky in front of me. The sky was clear, and the vast sea under the sky was roaring from time to time, breaking the silence all around me. The strong air here was slapping my face as if it were also punishing me for what happened today. The complete silence around me was not able to suppress the screaming inside my mind, which was making me crazy. Why am I here alone? Why did this happen to me? Why am I the subject of humiliation and hatred when I am also the victim here? After what happened today, did I have the courage to go back and face everything? A bitter smile crept onto my lips while tears were continuously pouring from my eyes. I knew the answer very well in my heart. All my life till today, I have never harmed anyone intentionally or unintentionally. Yet I was blamed today for what happened to her. I didn’t ask him to leave her. He left her on his own accord, yet he blamed me. Should I really die? I closed my eyes and took a step forward with a numb mind. I felt my body go weightless, and I felt the pressure of the air over my chest constraining my lungs to breathe. Do I really want to breathe now? No….. I don’t want to breathe even the last breath of my life…. This was the end of my life, and I gladly embraced my death because I can’t stand the humiliation that was not meant for me yet I faced today. The tears were still coming out of my eyes, but I felt at peace right now. No one will ever blame me for what I didn’t do. No one will ever know what happened to me. I wanted to say to him that he should be blamed for what happened today. He was the one who played with two lives, and he should be blamed for what happened to her. He was a coward and an opportunist who took advantage of two innocent girls, but I would not be able to say anything to him now. There was no use saying anything to him because it would not lessen the hatred in his heart. I wanted to tell him that I hated him more than he hated me. But I would never be able to tell him what was in my heart. There was no use in thinking about anything except him now. This was the end of my life, which I chose for myself and I have no regrets, but I do regret everything that happened today. Sebastian’s P.O.V. “No… stop… don’t go,” I screamed when she ran away from me. I was about to stand up in a panic when someone grabbed my arm. I looked at the person and saw Emily looking at me with tearful eyes. Her whole face was now covered with blood. “Don’t leave me…. Please don’t leave me,” she pleaded to me, but I once again looked in the direction where Violet ran away a few seconds ago. “What are you doing? Go behind her… Emily is dead… she won’t come back… save her…. Save Violet!” I screamed at myself in desperation, as all I wanted right now was to run behind Violet. “Don’t go…. I am scared,” Emily once again said to me in a fearful, choked voice while tightening her grip on my hand. “Let me go, Emily…. Let me go…. I need to save her… I need to save her,” I pleaded to Emily while trying to remove her grip on my hand. “Leave her…. Save her… go behind her!” I yelled at myself in a desperate and frustrated tone. He yanked his hand from Emily’s grip and ran towards the way Violet had run earlier. “Violet….. stop… Violet…. I didn’t mean that… I am sorry……..Violet,” I yelled in desperation while running towards her. I felt that my feet were glued in the same place. No matter how hard I tried to take one step towards her, I just couldn’t. She stopped on the other side of the road and looked back at me. Her face was now a mess. There was blood running down her face from her head. I raised my hand towards her to catch her. “Violet…. I .. I am sorry… I didn’t mean that… please come back… please come back… don’t go… don’t go,” I pleaded to her, desperately trying to take a step towards her but I wasn’t able to move my feet. She didn’t say a word but kept going far away from me. The pain and hurt in her eyes were enough to kill me. “Please come back…. Please,” I kept on pleading, but she didn’t listen to me. Suddenly she moved back, and before I could understand, a strong wind created a barrier between us, and when this barrier fell, she was not there. “Violet,” I screamed at the top of my lungs and immediately opened my eyes. I sat up immediately. I was completely covered in cold, and I was breathing heavily. I looked around frantically but met with the darkness of my room. I closed my eyes and gulped hard. I stood up from bed and went towards the window. I opened the window and took a few deep breaths to calm myself down. It was a routine for me now to have the same dream, or should I say, nightmare, every night. Every night, I tried to stop her from going away. Every night, I apologized to her for my wrongdoings, and every night, she disappeared, leaving me in tears and agony. I opened my eyes and looked at the dark sky blankly. I didn’t know where she is right now. I tried to find her with all my strength, but I couldn’t even manage to find a whiff of her whereabouts. It seemed that she disappeared into thin air. “Please come back to me… I promise that I will do anything to get your forgiveness,” I whispered to no one while looking at the sky with blank eyes. I had tears in my eyes, but there was no one with me to console me or tell me that everything would be okay. I wanted her to tell me that she was okay and happy wherever she was now. I didn’t know for how long I stayed in the same spot beside the window. I closed my eyes once again when I calmed down. I lowered my head and took a deep breath once again. I closed the window and went back to bed. I looked at the watch and sighed. It was 3 in the morning. I still had some time to get some sleep, but I knew that I wouldn’t get any sleep now, and would have a headache in the morning once again. I lay down and took my phone from the nightstand. I needed to find some more projects for my company, as we were facing some crises right now. I couldn’t even blame the person responsible for this mess, because he had every right to pour his anger on me. After browsing the web for a few minutes, I closed my eyes again and put the phone on my chest. I had a minimal social life because of what happened five years ago. Everyone loathed me, and I was blamed for everything that happened at that time. I suffered a huge blow, and it took me almost five years to come out of that trauma and disaster. I had no time to mend my own wounds because of the disaster that I faced in our company. I opened my eyes and looked at the ceiling blankly. Violet’s smiling face appeared in front of my eyes once again, making me smile lightly. She was not my girlfriend but we had a great understanding. She was like a fresh breeze that I miss badly now.