Snowed In: Nen and Anani

Chapter 1-1

Chapter 1

“Nen. It is time for you to go to my son.”

My breath stutters and I have to strain the muscles in my arms so my hands won’t fly to my chest. “Vasilissa?” My voice cracks, but the Vasilissa doesn’t comment on it.

“He needs you.” Her gaze clouds over and grows distant, as though she’s seeing something not visible to anyone but her. I don’t know if the Vasilissa has the seer gift, but wouldn’t be surprised if she does. After all, according to legend, only the Spirit is more powerful than the Vasilissa, holder of the four natural elements, ruler of Elemiis and all lands.

“He is…lonely. His soul suffers.” All color drains from her eyes until they’re as white as the snow during the Terrible Snow Rotation, and her breathing grows shallow. “He has been through enough for several lifetimes.”

I learned a long time ago to hide my feelings, to never let my face or body betray what’s going on inside me. But at her words, a nest of serpents appears in my gut. They slither and hiss and threaten to make me nauseous. Has something happened to the Vasilieu?

Her eyes roll to the heavens and she opens her palms. “It is time I right this wrong. I should have never let myself be dissuaded from my intentions. I should have been stronger.” The Vasilissa’s voice is hoarse, her words mumbled, and I doubt I’m meant to hear them. “He needs his soulmate, or he will perish.”

I clench my hands into fists and squeeze so my arms tremble. I have no idea what intentions she’s talking about, but I’m startled to hear the all-powerful Vasilissa admit—even inadvertently—that someone had talked her out of her plans. Who has that kind of influence? The council of elders? Surely she can easily overrule them? And what did she try to do?

My heart speeds up and I fear she will hear it thunder in my chest. I slowly take in my breath so I won’t startle her out of this state with any sudden noises, hoping she will reveal more.

But her eyes clear just as quickly as they clouded over, and she straightens her back. “Take your time, Nen. We still have a little while before he and his sisters need to walk the bridges,” she says as if the previous moments didn’t happen.

The bridges? The serpents in my belly multiply tenfold. “Are you ill, Vasilissa?”

The Vasilissa shakes her head. “I am…” Her voice trails off and she lets her face relax. Every wrinkle smooths out, and for a single heartbeat, she has an air of peacefulness about her. “I am resigned to my fate. When I accomplish what I want, I will be forced to let the next generation take over.” She raises her chin and all traces of vulnerability disappear. Gone is the mother missing her only son, and before me stands once again the regal Vasilissa of Elemiis, with long hair braided and wound around the top of her head like a crown. It shimmers in whites, golds, and coppers, and is more majestic than if she wore a tiara made from the most precious metal.

“Do you understand what I am telling you?” Her voice pulls on me. Demands me to obey. I fight to keep standing and not fall to my knees and bow before her. Not once have I done it since she banned me from seeking out the Vasilieu when he became of age, and I have no intention to do it now. Even so, I can’t figure out why she lets me get away with it. Everybody else is expected to kneel before their Vasilissa, including her children. At least in public. But not me anymore.

“Vasilissa?” I keep my face in an expressionless mask. I understand completely but can’t believe what I’m hearing. Why does she want to send me to him now? The laws forbidding two people of the same gender to be companions are still in effect.

Her eyes narrow into stormy slits, and her skin pales. The tug on my knees intensifies, but I lock them and resist. I cross my arms over my chest and try my best to present a calm exterior.

“This is not a time for insolence. I have let you keep your…powers…secret—” she spits out the words “—all this time. Are you going to make me regret it?”

The air sparkles with electricity as though a thunderstorm is approaching. Breathing grows difficult as if someone has circled my torso with a steel band and keeps tightening and tightening. The pull on my knees is unbearable and makes me stumble. Somehow, I manage to stay on my feet, but my arms fall to the sides. I avert my eyes, unable to endure the tornado building in her gaze.

“No,” I mumble.

The sparks fizzle out and I draw a deep breath, relieved when the pressure on my chest fades.

“Good man.”

My legs tremble worse than if I had run a hundred kilometers, but I remain standing. It takes all my strength to straighten my neck and look at her again. The storm clouds in her eyes have dissipated and I think I detect a glint of approval. I must imagine it.

“I will ask you again. My son needs you.”

“But…” I don’t know how to voice my question.

“I will make sure the…obstacle…is cleared for when you return. Do you understand what I am telling you?”

I do, but I don’t. What I hear is that she’s finally giving her consent for me and the Vasilieu to be companions. But I don’t understand how. If she was unable to change the laws fifteen rotations ago, how is it possible now?

The look in her eyes tells me to not ask more questions. The serpents in my belly wiggle and worm. My heart picks up speed and I use all my willpower to keep my voice steady. “I understand, Vasilissa.”

I doubted this day would ever arrive. I waited for something to happen, for change to come. Yearned. But when I still wasn’t allowed to leave the kastell and join the Vasilieu when he turned twenty, hope turned into despair since I couldn’t see a solution. My soul, too, has suffered, like the Vasilieu’s.

“You will leave at once. I will have Bobo arrange a carriage for you.”

“No, please. I prefer traveling on foot.” I need time to prepare. To calm both mind and soul. To find the right words to speak to the man who has never left my mind since I first laid eyes on him. Who holds my heart in his hands.

I hope she won’t insist. She doesn’t. “Very well. The bridges can wait. I can wait. It will take some time before you will be able to return.”

I don’t understand what she means but know better than to ask. Instead, I bow my head. “Thank you.”

She steps closer and lays her right index and middle finger between my eyebrows. Heat and chill prickle my skin at the same time, and suddenly I’m overwhelmed with her emotions. Feelings of sadness and remorse and longing for her lost son invade my mind, and I bite my lip to stop from gasping at the intensity. It lasts only for a few moments before they disappear as quickly as they came. She nods once, and mumbles, “Yes. You both deserve happiness. This is right.” I doubt it’s meant for my ears.

She withdraws her hand and I straighten.

“Safe travels, Nen of the Gennandora Forest. My gardens will not be the same without you as their master.”

She doesn’t give me time to reply; she turns so quickly, her floor-length kaftan swirls around her delicate body, making the reds, oranges, and yellows of the silky fabric appear like fire before it settles. She retreats behind the intricate, artful tapestry, leaving me alone with chaotic thoughts, a furiously beating heart, and feet aching to get going.