The Panther

Symphonix- Feel Free Sound is one of the biggest elements that bind us all supernatural or simply natural. It's how we express ourselves. How we communicate. It can be relaxing, artistic, and most of all dangerous. For me, it sets me free. It makes me feel powerful. There is no better high than when it gives in to my demands. I used to think that I had to listen for it. Hear it. I was wrong. Sound is a feeling. A vibration. Something I can reach out and touch. I can feel it on my skin. It's unlimited power because it's all around us and in everything. The drop of a pin in a silent room. The light whistling in the wind. The flow of water. The crackle in a flame. The buzz in electricity. All of it makes a sound and I can tap into all of these elements without letting them destroy me. I feel everything and I have learned to love it. "B, what are you doing?" my dad asked, opening the door just enough for him to look inside. The magik caught his attention and he pushed the rest of the door open. My room as the mess I made rose off the floor and began to go back to its rightful place on the shelves and the drawers. The colors are lifting everything. The chiming sound it makes is soothing. His smile is genuine. It's rare but it when it appears, there's an instant of relief in his eyes. He forgets everything he's lost and everything he's dealing with now and it's beautiful. But just for a moment and it doesn't last. "What's up?" I asked shutting my grimoire. His smile faded and he sighed. "You haven't left your room since the full moon three days ago. "You're putting all of your energy into your magik and Aspen is worried that you're not getting enough exercise," "I'm sorry for taking a break after all the bones in my body were broken and rearranged until I turned into a big ass cat," I scoffed. "Baby, I know this is hard for you. But there's nothing you can do about it right now. I need you to get out of this room. Eat something. If you don't take care of yourself properly, your magik is going to slow and by the looks of it, it's the only thing keeping you going right now. Shower, get ready for the day, and I don't know. Go out with some friends. Anything. Get the hell out of this room. Please," "Okay," I agreed. What friends? The coven shunned me and no one is allowed to help me with my magik. "Thank you," he nodded. "Can you teach me that or is it a sound thing?" "I can teach you. Shadow magik works too. This is part of our bloodline," I held the book up. "Not now," he shook his head. Ever since he found out the truth, anything related to our family is a taboo topic in our house. He shut the door behind him. Every time I turn I lose my magik for hours, but this past moon I lost it for two days and I was freaking out. It's because of my magik that I only turn on the full moon while the others turn when they want. Going a whole month without shifting makes each shift painful. I don't know how to reach out to the panther in me since the last time I spoke to her. I haven't had a chance to talk to Aspen. He's been dealing with the High Covens. Now that I exist, they have a problem with what he created. After a forty-minute hot shower and a change of clothes, I walked out into the garden. My dad's mate has a green thumb and while I rarely see her, I come here a lot. The catnip draws me in and she grew it along the grass bed so that I can come out here when I shift. It affects me more during the days leading up to the full moon. It keeps me here. It keeps me from running off. I've shifted sixteen times since I turned. The first time I killed someone. I ripped her apart and ate some of her organs. By the time Aspen and the others located me, I had shifted back and seen what I did. Her name was Leslie Rodriguez. She was twenty-seven years old, on the verge of graduating from UCLA, engaged, and human. I'm scared of this and I think it's the reason why I lose my magik. I have no control over the shift and even with all these shifters around me, I have no one to teach me. It's moments like this that I find myself missing the annoying demon that killed me, exploited me, and dragged me to hell. In what universe is that sane? How screwed up is my life that I find myself missing the very thing that changed my entire existence? A part of me wishes I could have just stayed with him. Gone to hell for the rest of eternity and never looked back. "Catgirl by the catnip!" I turned around to see Colton and his mate standing by the side gate. They don't come in here. The catnip makes them cranky. "Funny," I got up and went over to them. "Hey," "Your dad called us," Emilia informed me. "He's worried about you. I thought Aspen was helping with the cat stuff," "Aspen's family is under attack by the high council for the experiments. He wasn't here this month," "That's still going on?" Colton asked. "Why aren't you with him?" "I'm not allowed near any coven buildings for allowing Aspen to bite me," "Yeah, witches are really temperamental about their inner circle. You're lucky they didn't burn you at the stake for the demon stuff," "Babe," Colton elbowed her. We both laughed. "No, she's right. They're super judgy," I agreed. "Aren't you like their super mega witch queen or whatever?" "Not since I became catgirl," "I came to help," she took my hand. "I've seen the moon shift thing a couple of times in females that don't like being what they are. That usually happens when they've cut themselves off from their animal spirit. You do that because you're unhappy," "Emo catgirl," Colton smirked. "Check," "Come back to Oak Grove with us. I can teach you how to get in touch with her. I know kitties don't like being around us for extended periods of time but we have a ranch and I turned the top floor of the barn into a living space for you and yes. It is soundproof," "You built me a cat tree in your barn?" I smiled. She laughed. "Yes, I did. Complete with scratchers," "I miss you," Colton poked my shoulder. "I've learned a lot about this and I know you could use the help. Come home with me. Be the first catgirl to run with wolves," "Don't decide now. I want to go to the pier for some amusement park action. You have until we leave tomorrow to think about it. I will cry if you straight up say no," Emilia put her hand up. He smiled at her. Unlike my dad's smile, Colton's is frequent and very welcoming. I miss him and being stuck in this house waiting for Aspen to visit sucks more than being possessed. At least when that girl wanted to die, it was because it would mean something. It would mean that the thing inside of me wouldn't hurt anyone. I got rid of one demon only to welcome another. Unlike that one, I'd have to kill Aspen to get rid of this one. "I want to go," "Duh, you're coming," "No, I mean I want to go. I want to get out of this s**t hole. My dad hates me and this house. He rejected his mate and is throwing himself into all ongoing homicide cases of this crap city while she comes and goes. I can't go to school because I was legally declared dead after I attacked that girl. I don't have anything left here. I might as well make myself useful somewhere else," "Okay," she nodded. "Good. That's what I wanted to hear. I mean not word for word. It was kind of spiteful but I'll take it," "I didn't mean for it to be. I'm just mad all the time. I'm sorry," "That anger is part of the problem," she booped my nose. "You are not even a little bit of a lost cause. You're just-" "An emo catgirl," my brother finished. "You guys go to the pier and have fun. I am going to call Aspen and pack up," "Are you sure?" he asked. "Yeah, I'm sure. I want to see the human-sized cat tree now and I don't want to be a third wheel on a cute pier date. That would be excruciatingly depressing," "Cool cause I wouldn't want you to hit a deep emo chakra point and dive off the pier head first," he smirked. "I also wanted to invite you back because I've been having trouble with my shadow magik," "You should have come to me a long time ago. What's going on?" "Blackouts, fits of rage, weird visions, and migraines," "Colton," I growled at him. "I know but I wanted to give you some time to grieve the loss of your-uh, demon?" "I didn't lose him. I can conjure him up whenever I want," I pointed at my side. "He shouldn't be up here. Seriously, you should have told me as soon as the migraines started. The weird visions are there because you haven't been practicing the way you're supposed to be so your magic is building up inside of you causing the fits of rage. The blackouts are there because your major magik points are probably overwhelmed. You're a shadow witch from a bloodline that is known to be consumed by their magik. Never ever do that again. Now, I'm going to have to channel it out of you and it's going to hurt. First shift kind of pain," "Aww man," he shut his eyes. "I know. So, go on your date. The next week of your life after is going to suck," I laughed. He ruffled my hair. I hissed at him and swatted away his hand. My claws came out. I looked down at my hand. That's never happened before. Especially not a few days after a full moon. "Oh, is it possible that you two idiots are homesick?" Emilia asked. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take him away," "Don't be sorry. He's an alpha. He needed you. I don't even know how to shift without a full moon or how to control her hunger. I actually don't even feel it until just before I shift. We'd be in the same position," "It's because you have no way to connect you to her. You're actually going to need your mate for that. How is Aspen doing with his shift?" "He's fine. He's completely in touch with the animal in him. He wanted to be this," I shrugged. "B, I don't mean to be a d**k but if you were to leave and not tell him, how long do you think it'll take him to figure out that you're not here?" "I'd know immediately. My panther knows where his mate is at all times and if she were to leave. He'd become immediately hostile," Aspen and some of his siblings arrived. "I knew the moment you got near her," "I thought you said you weren't coming back for a few more days, yesterday" I got between them. Since Colton became an alpha the two of them can't be left alone. "Change of plans. The council wants to see you. I've been trying to get them to either reinstate you as a circle member or let us legally bring you back so you can go back to school. It finally came through, they will rather you practice than allow you to take your sound magik into the mortal world," "Pass," I shrugged. "I'm sorry? I thought this is what you wanted," he looked up at my brother. "I have to help my brother and I have to get this under control," I looked down at my hand to see my claws are gone. "You're busy," "I know. I'm sorry. The covens are threatening my dad with treason if he doesn't give them his research," "What?" I looked up at his siblings. "They called us abominations. With dad out of the way, we're going to be hunted down and killed," Luna stepped forward. "I know we've isolated you since all of this started but you have to believe that we have your best interest at heart," "I don't doubt that," I sighed. "But I have no control of myself. Not the panther and not my magik. I wouldn't be of any use in a place that probably wants to kill me. I have no protection," "You're right," Aspen nodded. "I think it's a trap too. Which is why I came back early. I didn't know you were having trouble with your magik. Why don't I help you pack up?" he looked over at Luna. "Set a perimeter," she bowed to him and turned away with the three others they had come with. "We need to talk, Colton. No teeth,"