I Will See You
1075 Words
FLORIAN'S P.O.V.
It all flashed before my eyes. All of the years that I have waited, it all felt like it came down to this one moment.
But still, just like all that time that I waited, the ones thing that held me back was right there, behind me, yelling my name.
I could see the terror in his eyes, like he knew I hadn't forgiven what he did to my Ellinel. Like he knew that I wanted to see his blood against these streets. Like he knew, I would never let go till one of us was down, and I am not used to losing.
But just like all those years ago, just like all that time ago, even when the memories of what had happened to Ellinel were still fresh in my mind, Roxanne was right there.
Over the years, I have become convinced that the feral obsession that I feel for Roxanne is nothing but fate's cruel way of painting me as the bad guy even towards Ellinel. Because for as long as she was on her brother's side, I would never be able to make her cry. I will never be able to break her.
I can hear her screaming my name, and I can't bring myself to do it anymore. I slowly leaned away from him, letting him pull himself up over the rail, my eyes watching him, making sure he knew that soon enough, Roxanne will stand behind me, and she will choose me. That I will do what I wanted, and she wouldn't even bat an eyelash.
"Florian," she said, slowly walking up to me.
I slowly turned to her, my eyes meeting hers. Her hair was dishevelled, her lips parted. Tears stood in her eyes, and her hands were wrapped around her.
I could tell that she didn't feel safe, and I hated that I let the demons slip. I hated that I let her see me this way.
"Who is Ellinel?" She asked, her voice low, her eyes darting across both of mine. "Why are you doing this because of her?"
I blinked slowly. Because of Ellinel? Yes. Mostly. But Rox, too. She was the reason I hadn't hesitated with Damien. He hurt her, and he paid for it. Like I desperately need Ronan to. But he is still riding on the waves of luck and she gives a f**k about him, and I... I am a fool for her.
"Why won't you answer?!" She screamed, her tears running steadily down her cheeks, her lips quivering hard.
Were those tears for the fact that I had dangled her brother's life right in front of her, or was it because she was scared she was really second choice?
Second choice? Roxanne was never second choice to me. I am wild, untamed, and full of experiences except for one. The experience of loving a woman that wasn't Roxanne. Wanting a woman that wasn't Roxanne. Her brother, unknowingly, was the second choice between both of them. He only became my friend because I loved her. I only kept him around because I loved her. I only kept him alive this long because I loved her.
"Florian!"
"No," I said finally, my eyes wide. "I am not doing anything because of..."
"Who was she to you? Why am I just hearing about her?"
"Because she is dead," Ronan said suddenly, and the devil help me, but it was getting harder to rein myself in.
Her eyes widened, and she seemed to process it. I swallowed before turning away.
I was done with this. With being here without watching a streak of blood on the floor for every line of coke Ronan did on her.
"Florian."
I stopped, then turned to her, my eyes thin. I loved her, but sometimes, I wish she wasn't there. I wish I didn't.
"What you dod to Damien..." she trailed off, and I felt everything in me soften. Against my own sanity, I covered the distance to her, my hands wrapping around her head, and brought her to my chest.
She fought back for a few seconds but soon grabbed unto my shirt, burying her face deeper into it, her chest heaving hard.
My eyes fell on Ronan, who was watching me the secret deep within us, and he would be the one to take it to his hrave. I will ensure he gets there before me, even if it has to be by a minute. And by my hands too. Ronan has to die by my hands.
"It was all for you, Roxanne. Everything. It doesn't matter what anyone else says. You are the who can either unleash me or tame me."
"Yeah," Ronan said, moving slowly towards his car. "Tell her about the way you were so creepily obsessed with her! Show her that creepy gallery, and tell her how you were f*****g Ellinel on the side when Roxanne proved to be too hard to get for you!"
My eyes only thinned more, and I pressed her closer into me, grateful for the fact that she wasn't fighting again.
"I am so f*****g scared. I don't know who to trust anymore. I don't know... who to be safe with anymore."
I pressed her closer in, leaning to her, my eyes fixed on Ronan's car as he sped away. I apparently haven't done enough damage since he was still driving.
"Trust me," I whispered to her, my fingers running down her silky, beautiful hair. "You are safe with me. No matter what you see... No matter what i become, Roxanne, you will always be perfectly safe with me."
She sniffed, her chest heaving. "How am I supposed to trust you when it feels like you are lying to me? When it feels like you are keeping things from me?"
I was. But she didn't need to know those gruesome details. She didn't need to know the less than flowery part.
She herself had said it. She had watched me lose my teenage innocence. Life had happened, but I was about to happen to life, too. In the worst way. In the most cruel way.
A smile lifted my lips. I could no longer see Ronan, but I could feel the rage burning through me.
"Just trust me, Roxanne," I said to her, my eyes fixed on the road, my smile widening a little.
I will see you in Macau, Ronan. I will see you.
- Writer
