Mine, To Hold And Behold

Chapter 16

Decisions. The are not always too easy to make. Sometimes we have to make a lot of compromises in order to make a simple choice. I am standing in a similar two way road right now. In front of me I have two routes to take. The first route is which where I go on a smooth ride, where I stay as arogant as ever, and fight for Pari's love all over again and eventually conquer it. But through this way, I might lose her trust and also never earn respect for myself and also my love, ever.

However the second path is a little rough. I could chose to go on with the Cairo project of our company and live in Cairo for an year and not see Pari during that time. Then I can prove myself to the world and earn respect. But via this route, I might lose Pari forever, by giving her space and time.

I couldn't afford to loose her. Not now, when I learned how my life would be with her and without her. If I give time for Pari to think and decide about me, then there are high possibilities for her to leave me for good. Because that's what she does, she over analizes things and takes rash decisions which always hurt me the most.

And to top it off, there are her father, that sleezeball Noel, and lot of other idiots back home who never understood our love, and they would try to manipulate her decisions and make her dump me. That's what people do, they take Pari away from me, each and ever time, one way or the other. I really cant let that happen.

What do I do?

I can't leave her. But at the same time, I cannot go after her and live with her if she can't trust me to stay with her forever. She has doubts on my love, I could see it in her eyes. She doesn't trust me. And I have never done anthing in my life worth enough, to make her respect me.

I love her. I do. But what Mr. Sharma said is also true. Love doesn't feed you. Where am I gonna take her? To my old rusty apartment? And how am I gonna feed her? By earning money through bets and sheding blood around? She would die before using that money for herself.

I am not the C.E.O yet. Not in paper definitely. Dad made me one, because he loves me. And he wants me to take up responsibility. I didnt earn it. So I don't deserve it.

I don't want something which I haven't earned through my blood and sweat, because there is no honour in it. And mostly I don't want my Pari to be embarassed about me being worthless. I want her to be proud of me. I want her to say with pride, that I am what I am because of myself and she is proud to be mine.

Ugh... What do I do?

Choices.... choices......

Hell! Where the fu*k is a choice in this? I don't have a fu*king choice in here. I gotta do this. I have to earn what is mine.

I have decided.

I am going to Cairo and I am gonna work hard on the project and make everyone around me proud. Once I have earned the trust of all the board of directors, I am gonna wait for their vote of confidence and take up the C.E.O position with dignity. Not because my dad gave it to me. But because I earned it, rightfully.

But before that, I got to do, one last thing.

I opened my cell phone and dialled the familiar Indian number. It rang for a while and later a sleepy, groggy, voice answered the phone, "Hey dude! It's 3 am here so you better have a good reason to disturb my sleep", Benji said.

I rolled m eyes, "I have a job for you" I said,

"Do you, now?", he asked sarcastically. He knows, I only call when I have an important task for him.

"Oh yeah! And the price for that is enough to fund your new buisiness" I said and I knew now I had his full attention. I smirked.

*******

"Good evening gentleman" A white man, whom I recognized as Mr. Gills said. He was there for a breakfast meeting a few days ago with my dad. Soon my gaze traveled along other members of the conference who were seated on the rectangular table and found Mr. Andrew Simons, who was along with Mr. Gills at that meeting. He looked rather relaxed and even a smile was etched upon his wrinkled face where as Mr. Gills who was still in his early thirties had that serious look on his face which made him look older than his age. "We are pleased to extend our buisiness with Mr. Krish and his son, Mr. Raghu", a decent round of applause continued, in which neither me nor m dad clapped. "We hope to start the power plant project in Cairo as soon as possible. So Mr. Raghu, when are you planning to leave?" he asked me, with a tone,

My dad leaned forward and was about to say something when I decided to inturrept him, "Mr. Gills. Before I announce my departure, I need a few more details which are, exceptionally missing in your project files" I said. I know everone thought I would be lazing around without an ounce of interest or responsibility, but I did do m homework, before coming to this meeting at Gills Corporation. The project files which the sent to our board of directors were incomplete and lacking the important details. I wonder why my dad was involved with people who are so lousy that the can't even maintain good paper work. Everyone fell silent, even the old, brooding board of directors of my company gazed at me with an heightened sense of interest.

''Er", he hesitated and I smirked, "What details Mr. Raghu" his voice contained an new respect towards me. I think I am now slowly comprehending the power of respect. Because all of a sudden, I felt more confident and stronger.

"First of all, I need to talk with the head of finance department who has planned the budget of this project. Both from Gills Corporation and our's"I said the last part turning towards my dad. He had a frown etched on his face which I ignored duly. "I need my new personal secretory to give a complete presentation of the shedule, design and also, I need to know who will be working on my team", I said.

"And yes, I also want that Noel guy as my assistant", I said turning towards Mr. Sharma. His frown was matching that of my dad's.

******

As soon as I was done with giving out orders, I concluded the meeting and stepped out of the conference hall. Dad was about to stop me and have a 'talk', when suddenly Mr. SHarma, stopped him and pulled him away from me. I took the opportunity to make an escape.

As I continued walking through the corridor of the office, I could hear Gill's employees whispering to each other. I knew news spreads faster than fire but the thing that I haven't expected was that the media to smell that fire so soon.

As soon as I steeped my foot outside the building I was greeted by flashes and a lot of questions. The reporters surrounded me like a swam of flies surrounding the leftovers. I removed my glasses and looked at all of them as the were beeing handled by the guards. I raised m hand to signal them to calm down and ask thier queries one b one.

"Mr. Raghu, is it true that you have been announced as the C. E. O of the compan b our father unofficially?", a reporter asked.

Yës, it's true", I said in a clipped tone,

Ïs it also true that, you have rejected the offer?", another one fired

No", I said in a calm and composed tone.

"What do you mean, 'no'?" the same reporter asked,

"No, means...", I pretended to be in deep thought, "No means N-O, 'no''', I smirked and the reporters laughed at m humour. When the all sobered up, I answered in a serious tone, ''I will be leading the Cairo power plant project for the next twelve months. Once I have successfully completed the project and am sure that I have won the confidence of the board of directors, I will take up the position of C.E.O. The compan is mine, and so is the position. I don't have the habbit of letting go, what's rightfull mine" I said in a tone of finality.

"When are you leaving, Sir?" a female reporter questioned,

''After I deal with a few unfinished buisiness. It will be take a couple of days or so", I said

"We have heard that you are currently engaged to someone, is that true?", A reporter who was in his middle thirties asked, I smiled a fake smile and denied it. "But there is a rumour that you have been introduced as her fiance to the high societ in the charit event, you have recently attended", the same reporter pressed,

"Like you said, you heard a rumour, which holds no truth", I was done with answering the questions, before anone else could bombard another personal question and jeopardize my life even more, I made a quick escape to m car, where my chauffeur was waiting and hopped in.

"To the hotel", I said quickly and the car made a run.

******

"So you are leaving", Pari said, as soon as I entered her room. She wore a lemon colour loose top and blue jeans, her hair was loose and flowy like always. She was looking out of the window as the housekeeping maid answered. She left and silence engulfed the room and Pari didnt even look at me while she spoke, "Wh am I not surprised, after all, you are so good at it. Running away",

"Babe!"I sighed, How do I explain?

"Don't you dare call me that", she turned towards me and with quick strides she stood in front of me, ''your life is a mess, but don't you dare make mine a mess as well", she warned through gritted teeth.

"Why did you come back in the first place if you wanted to leave?", she threw her hands in air,

Ï have to do this, Pari. Please don't make this difficult for me", I said in a pleading voice.

"Don't make it difficult for you? How can ou be so selfish, Raghu?"she asked with teras brimming her eyes, I stepped closer to her ans she took a step awa from me. Ï never asked you to come find me. you dumped me and I left. I was happy in my life, I was engaged to a decent man and..."she trailed off, looking me in the eye. ''you know, when you came back, I knew you were there to break my engagement. But still, somewhere in the corner of my heart, it gave me hope. That you were here for me, to make me yours. Trust me, if you haven't pulled the stunt you just did, I would have definitely given into you", her words made me smile. She maintained that hurt look on her face.

"But its all gone now. You proved me wrong. Your love is like monsoon, Raghu. It is seasonal, it comes and goes and comes and goes", she said with a resigned sigh, I shook m head in denial. No words could conve m message. I just kept shaking m head to erase her thoughts, Ï don't trust you. I need a man whom I can rely on, and you are definitely not him. I can't trust you. Not after you made the decision", she said and turned away from me. I could smell her tears.

"Pari. It is not like that. Look, I have to do this. I need to earn our respect and I need to gain our fathers confidence in order to marry you. I need to prove myself worthy"I said in the most convincing voice, I could muster, but... something told me, it was all futile.

öu should have talked to me, before making the decision. I should have a sa in it too. ou can't just barge into m life and jeopardize everything and leave as per you wish. Its m life too. And I should have a say in it", She said sitting on the couch with slumped shoulders.

And I know she is right, I should have told her first or atleast discussed it with her. But I didnt. I left her waiting for me, last night, when I mself asked her to not to go to bed, because we needed to talk. And now, I am leaving her again. I don't beleive I am hurt the person I love the most. I just can't believe it.

I kneeled in front of her. I looked at her face, she looked tired, dark circles were lining her ees, due to lack of sleep. Her ees closed and she had this tired look on her face. I held her face in both my palms and lifted it a little. Her eelids fluttered open slowl and the unshed tears started to spill. Ï know I have always asked ou and never gave you anthing. And today, unfortunately, its going to be the same. I am gonna ask you to do something for me. WIll you do it?"I asked and she remained motionless. There was no expression on her face and no sign of acceptance. I sighed. I can ask her something but I cannot expect her to do it. It's not fair for her. "Babe. I love you. I want you to wait for me. I know you have done it for a long time and have been doing so. But, for me, I want ou to wait for one more year. I want you to go back to India and start your career. I want you to make friends. I want you to do all those things in your life which you wanted to do but you couldn't because of me. I want you to live your life. One year. The time will be yours and only yours." I pulled her closer and pressed m lips on her forehead. ''And after this ear, i am gonna be back and I will make ou Mine, officially", I said.

Her tears turned to sobs and I pulled her towards me into a warm embrace. Her head rested on m chest and my fingers tangled in her hair. I held her for I don't know how long. But this time, unlike other times, I wanted this moment to end. I didnt want the world to pause and this moment to freeze. Because this time, I understood what I actuall want and need from life.

To be happy for the rest of my life, I need to be sad first.

To smile genuinely, I need to shed a few tears first.

To be together, we need to part ways first.

To conquer her heart, I need to conquer the world first.

To make the ends meet, I need to work harder first.

And like that, we cried. I wasn't ashamed that moment to shed an tears. Because I knew, one day, all these tears will be worth the smiles, for the rest of our lives.

WITH THE COUSINS WEDDING TOMORROW, I ABSOLUTEL HAD NO TIME TO WRITE. SO THERE IS NO CHANCE OF EDITING. I AM WRITING THIS CHAPTER FROM MY AUNT'S LAPTOP AND THE KEY, Ý', AND A FEW OTHER KEYS AREN'T WORKING PROPERL. SO THERE ARE GONNA BE A FEW ERRORS.

I TRIED TO EDIT TO MY BEST. BUT DUE TO LACK OF TIME, IT WAS A LITTLE DIFFICULT.

I HOPE OU ALL LIKED THE CHAPTER. PLEASE VOTE AND COMMENT.

I ADDED THE IMAGE OF KRISH, RAGHU'S DAD ON THE SIDE.

HAVE A NICE EVENING.