APRIL 2021—PRESENT DAY
I stretched up on my tiptoes and peered out the peephole on my front door.
Nobody was there.
Why would there be?
My mind was in a bizarre, hormonal, completely frazzled state; a state of total overdrive. I managed to convince myself that every single sound I heard could potentially be him. That he had somehow found my apartment, and that he was standing outside my door, fist poised to knock, with those dreaded words of rejection ready on his tongue.
But then I’d peek out my peephole and at the sight of a blissfully empty hallway, my dread would melt away. I remembered, as I gazed at that fisheye view of the hallway, that I was being ridiculous, and then I turned on my heel to go plop back down on the sofa.
And then this vicious, exhausting cycle would star
