December 14 It’s 4 A.M. I wake, groggy and reach for my iPhone which I keep near me like a security teddy bear on my bed. Half asleep, dreamless, I log into Grindr. I get these urges after a dull s*x-void day at work. Suddenly near dawn I have to find out what’s going on, what I may have missed, if anyone sent me a message asking to get f****d. On Grindr, I notice a man in an elegant thumbnail picture with a miniscule swan near him. It disturbs me. I’m more fully awake now. I sit up properly and register the tiny picture on the Grindr profile page. The man himself has a long elegant neck and he is out of doors, looking over a precipice. I mostly notice the tiny swan in the picture’s background floating on a green lake. It’s all postage stamp sized, but it’s very clearly shot and looks