Prologue
New York City.
"Where are you going?"
I stopped packing my clothes when I heard the voice of my husband, whose arrival from his business trip I hadn't even noticed.
"I'm leaving," I replied emotionlessly.
He chuckled, but I could sense the nervousness in his laughter. He hugged me from behind, but I quickly moved away from him.
I continued putting my belongings in the suitcase, but I paused as he held my hand and turned me towards him.
I pulled my hand away and closed my suitcase before glancing at him again. I handed him the divorce papers I had prepared while he was on his business trip.
"What the hell, Sam? W-what's the meaning of this?" I saw fear in his eyes as he briefly glanced at the paper I gave him.
“Divorce papers.”
"Jesus! Sam—"
"I know everything now," I cut him off.
I don't want to hear his lies. I'm tired of it.
He looked at me with confusion in his eyes. He was about to touch me when I took a step back away from him.
"On Julian's birthday, you lied that you were in a meeting. I was actually planning to surprise you, so I went to your office..." I swallowed the lump in my throat and avoided eye contact with him. I should have left when he was gone. I shouldn't have waited for him to come back. "...but I was the one who got surprised when I saw my husband having s-s*x with his ex-girlfriend."
He shook his head and held his head in his hands. He fell silent for a moment before giving me a pleading look. "Sam, no, I was drunk that night! I had a meeting and—"
I wiped the tears that fell from my eyes and silenced him.
"You were drunk, but it wasn't enough to excuse the fact that you cheated on me! You broke your promise that I would be the only woman in your life. Marrying you was the biggest mistake I made in my life."
"No, Sam! I regret what I did with her, believe me! It was just lust! You are the one that I love! Please, Samantha, forgive me... I promise I won't do it again. I'm sorry," he said as tears started falling from his eyes.
He was crying, but I couldn't muster any sympathy for him. He was begging, but my decision to leave him was final. I wouldn't be like my mother, who forgave my father countless times for his infidelity. I deserved better than a cheating husband.
I loved him, but I realized that I needed to love myself more. I wouldn't allow myself to be miserable.
I held my stomach as a pang of pain hit me. I found out that I was pregnant, but even so, I wouldn't stay. I wouldn't let my child witness how unfaithful his father was. I wouldn't let him/her see our loveless marriage.
Loveless, because I could feel it; I was slowly losing the love I had for him every time I remembered how he kissed that woman. How he thrust his hips on her. How they moaned that night.
"My decision is final. Our marriage is done. You can now go f*ck her as much as you want! I don't care..."
He shook his head and tried to reach for me again, but I quickly gathered my things and walked away.
I am Samantha Miller—I'll never beg for love. I won't stay with a person who doesn’t love me enough to resist temptation over lust.
Never.
