Thirty Nights Forgotten

Chapter 13: Grief

Nick’s POV

“Can we stop here for the night?”

I hesitate to even ask Nicholas, but I need to rest. We’ve been hiking through the woods non-stop since yesterday morning when Addy was taken. Even though I’ve been wearing my sneakers, my legs and feet feel like they’re on fire.

I need to sleep tonight before my legs give out.

Nicholas hasn’t spoken a word since we set off, so I’m just following him blindly through the woods.

“Nicholas, did you hear me? Can we camp here tonight? I need a break!”

He stops dead in his tracks, but he doesn’t turn around to look at me.

“Of course, I heard you the first time. I have superior hearing, after all.”

“Then why didn’t you answer me?”

Letting out a long sigh, he turns to me with a haggard expression I’ve never seen on his face before – not even the time Addy was kidnapped by Malcolm of the Blood Moon Pack.

Back then, he was determined to bring her home at all costs. But right now, he looks a little lost, which makes me feel even more worried than I already am. If Nicholas doesn’t know how to get her back, then I’m not sure what we’re going to do.

“I’ll go catch a rabbit for dinner,” he says brusquely. “You start the fire and wash up in the stream.”

Before I have a chance to say anything, Nicholas disappears into the forest.

I immediately head down the hill toward the creek, and dipping my aching feet into the cold, rushing water feels so good. However, the pain I’ve endured has given me a welcome distraction from thoughts of Addy, and right now, sitting here alone in the quiet forest, I begin to feel that lump in my throat again.

My eyes begin to burn with hot tears, and I bury my face in my hands. There’s a tightness in my chest, as though my heart physically aches from being separated from her.

I can’t lose her. I don’t even know how to go on without her, so right now, I feel totally and completely lost.

Suddenly, I feel Nicholas reappear by my side, and a dead rabbit lands beside me on the ground.

“Dinner is served.”

I glance up to see him wiping some blood from the corner of his mouth, and I recoil away from him.

“Ew! Did you drink its blood?”

“Yes, I did, and I’m leaving the rest of it for you. You should be more grateful.”

“But I thought you only drank human blood?”

“Trust me, I would much rather be drinking human blood, but unless you want me to feed from you, the wildlife will have to suffice.”

The idea of Nicholas drinking my blood makes me want to puke, especially since I know how he can get aroused from it.

Yeah, no thanks.

When I finish up in the creek, I begin building a fire. Nicholas seems lost in thought, and it’s difficult to sense his emotions through the mate bond.

The further we get from Addy, the weaker our bond feels. I can still sense her, but it’s faint. And as for the connection between Nicholas and I, our ability to sense each other’s emotions is dampened as well. Addy is the conduit between us, and without her, I have no idea what he’s thinking.

As the rabbit roasts over the fire, I glance over at Nicholas.

“Are you going to let me in on your plan now?”

He continues staring into the fire, so I let him mull over my question for a moment.

“There is a village we should reach in two days’ time. I know an old goblin there that has been loyal to the House of Ourey for nearly two centuries now. He will be the one to fill us in on what is happening in this realm and what exactly we’re up against. He is well-established in the merchant class, and we will need his help and connections if we have any chance of rescuing Addy.”

“Makes sense,” I nod. “You mentioned earlier about a symbol on the soldiers’ uniforms. Did you remember who it was?”

“Yes. It is the symbol of the Ice Moon Pack, led by the great warrior alpha, Elijah. Apart from the Blood Moon Pack, which I put an end to, the Ice Moon Pack is among the strongest werewolf clans in the realm. If there was an opportunity to seize the throne, I have no doubt that Elijah would be strong enough to take it by force.”

“I’m assuming there isn’t an election or anything here in the Demon Realm?”

Nicholas lets out a hollow laugh at my question.

“No. In this world, only the strongest survive. Power is seized and maintained through force, and I am sure there was a battle to the death to take the throne. My very presence here is a direct threat to his claim, which is why I think Elijah might be holding Addy captive as bait – to lure me to the castle.”

“Oh, do you think he recognized her from one of the parties you threw when we were here last time?”

“No, he was never in attendance. The Ice Moon Pack is responsible for guarding the northernmost borderlands against our enemies. They rarely ventured south far enough to come to the castle. But they are not dumb brutes like many of the werewolf packs. Elijah is a skilled war tactician; in fact, he’s one of the best in the realm. I suspect he sent the witch, Sybil, to spy on me and bring me here to eliminate me, thereby ensuring I would never return to reclaim my birthright. In fact, I would not be surprised if he has eliminated what remains of the House of Ourey already.”

Nicholas narrows his gaze, staring even deeper into the fire.

“Don’t pretend like that doesn’t bother you, Nicholas.”

“You have met the Dark Oureys. There is no reason to grieve their loss; they were horrible people.”

“It’s okay to mourn their deaths, you know. Just because they weren’t as warm as their Light Ones, that doesn’t mean they weren’t the family you were raised with.”

“This is a pointless conversation,” he says abruptly. “Addy is the only family I care about now. Anyway, I’m going to sleep. You take the first watch. Tan that rabbit hide and add it to your loincloth. You cannot run around with your bare ass on such brazen display.”

“Well, if you’d give me back my pants–”

“No. I already gave you my shoes and some fabric from my shirt for your loincloth.”

“Actually, those are my shoes and my shirt.”

He completely ignores me, rolling over onto his side to face away from me.

Rolling my eyes, I reach to grab the rabbit from the makeshift spit and begin to eat. After sharing a body with Nicholas for nearly two years, I’ve come to know that he cares more about family than he’s willing to let on. He may put on a strong façade, but on the inside, he’s grieving their loss in his own way.

And I know he’s come to care about my family. It’s not just Addy he cares about anymore. It’s all of them, too.

But it would take a miracle for him to admit it out loud.