KALEN

Chapter |11| Talk Of The Devil

T E S S A ' S P. O. V

Is it possible to be in love with an apartment?

The moment I saw this studio flat in Denver that overlooks the botanic gardens I got that warm gushy feeling that I normally attribute to love.

The intense rush I received from brushing my fingers along the mahogany oak hall stand or the platinum silver trimmings or the silver chandelier, just secured my every thought that this was the apartment Kalen and I were going to first live in.

The first few months were a rocky adjustment, trying to move everything from New York to Denver whilst I juggled my classes on top, and Kalen adjusted his work schedule.

Sometimes he travelled back to New York for meetings and didn't come home until the early morning which was strange.

Still, it was better than being separated. Now we shared the same bed, we could f**k without limitations.

I think that was probably my favourite part.

My phone rings in the background whilst I finish off some study notes. In six months we would be moving back to New York, and hopefully getting married.

We left all the details to our parents because to be honest, I don't really care how what the wedding is like. I just want to marry him and if that means having a lavish ceremony with a hundred guests to please both our mothers, then fine.

The only thing I put my foot down on is the dress. I fell in love with this light bohemian gown with a satin trimmed belt around the middle, whilst visiting Kiara in Italy. I met with the seamstress and in a few months I'll be flying back over to collect it.

My mother wanted to wear her old dress from the eighties. It's beautiful but it's not me. I finally understand why people cry on Say Yes To The Dress.

Finally the ringing ceases and my best friend picks up. "I'm gonna die!", are the first words screamed down the receiver.

"Afternoon to you too."

She gives them that fatal death stare that made most girls bawl in high school. "It's almost nine here and my goddam baby still won't sleep."

"Hey this is why they say abstinence is the best method of birth control."

"Like you and my brother don't f**k like rabbits. Actually scratch that I really don't want that image in my head." I flush, remembering the string of dirty messages I accidentally sent to Kiara instead of my fiancé.

"Let me see my niece." Kiara holds up her screaming baby into the camera. My ears burn from the noise. She really is Kiara's daughter.

"Hi Stasia, hi baby...oh my god you look so cute in your little onesie that Aunt Tessa bought you..." Yes my baby talk is embarrassing but honestly I don't think anyone can help it when they see an adorable little face like hers.

"She is cute. At least there's that to counter the fact she poops like nothing have I've ever encountered, likes to pee all over me and screams all night...and day. I don't even know when the little heathen sleeps."

"How are you?" She removes all hyperbole and sighs heavily.

"Exhausted. Terrified. I know everyone says it's hard but I think at one point it just hits you. I have a baby, I'm responsible for the little thing. I can't f**k her up in the same way I am."

"We're all a little f****d up Kiara. It would be concerning if you had a perfect child...especially considering who her parents are."

Kiara shoots me that sharp glare again. "Tessa don't."

I wince involuntarily. The family want me to talk about it with her. We're all the same page, Kiara has to tell the father at some point, but apparently it'll be better coming from me.

"Kiara come on. Anastasia is already five months old, she's missing out being here with her family and you need our help, our support and you could go to college with me, get a job, your own house. Even though Aaron isn't apart of your lives, you're still letting him control it."

"I can't tell him. I won't."

"She deserves to know her dad."

"But what if he doesn't want her? He never wanted kids, he'll just reject us anyways."

"What if Stasia finds out that you never told him, that she could have had a father and you stopped her. She'll resent you."

"She'll get over it. I can't Tess." I drop the subject knowing it won't take us anywhere.

"How is he...doing? I mean is still hooking up with fifty girls a night." She scoffs. "I was seen as a slut yet Aaron Black is the biggest w***e I've ever met."

I can't help but laugh. "He's well surprisingly but I mean I just get accounts from the news, and Kai. He goes to Ghost a lot. Apparently he hasn't seen Aaron with any girls, he's made a Tristan his right hand man and they're expanding the business both legitimately and well...the other way. I heard he's trying to contact your dad about a business deal but Ryder keeps turning him down."

"Wow. That's a lot."

"You asked. He seems good, Kiara." She swallows with difficulty, clearing her throat, and brushes away some fallen tears.

The silence is deafening.

The two of us look stare at the tiny little baby who's fallen asleep to our petty argument. Kiara chokes out a laugh. "Figures the only thing that would get her to sleep is us shouting."

"I love you Kiara, and I will always protect you over him."

"I know you're only looking out for me. I'm sorry for being so abrupt. I'm just tired."

"Get some sleep and if you need anything."

"You're there?"

I laugh. "Definitely."

The moment the call ends, I exhale this massive sigh that had been building up for so long. I'm so torn between morality and loyalty.

In this situation, I believe Aaron deserves to know but I would never betray my best friend's wishes if she didn't want him too.

I push away the conflicting thoughts and in focus on dinner instead, ignoring my anxiety that flares when I realise Kalen's still not home yet.

***

I'm finally drifting off to sleep when the door clicks open. My body is too excited to see my boyfriend that I leave the warm bed easily in pursuit of him.

His back is turned to me when I reach the kitchen. I can tell he's exhausted just from the haggard expression of him hunching over the counter and the heavy sigh he exhaled echos throughout the silence.

There's something off about him though. He clutches at his arm, his body shudders like he's being tormented and there's blood...I didn't notice it before, but as I step into the light I can see it clearly, streaked down his pants, his jacket.

"What..." He tenses at the sound of my voice. "Kalen there's blood. There's so much blood."

As I reach him I find the cause. A large jagged cut that runs across his arm, the jacket torn at the seam displaying the multitude of bruises to follow it.

I don't even realise I'm crying until he reaches forward to brush them away. Then he stiffens and quickly pulls back but I see it already, his thumb smeared in blood now staining my cheek.

His fist it clenched, gripping the table and he winces as he sits down in the stool. "Can you grab me a wet paper cloth and the first aid kit?"

We don't speak as I help him clean the wound and then dress it.

As I glance up I notice blood in his hairline too. There's a cut that runs down his scalp into his cheek. I reach up to clean it and he flinches.

"You need stitches." I murmur, the numbness kicking in.

"I can't go to the hospital right now. Too much questions." He's choosing the mafia over his own health. I could never do that. I wouldn't, so I instead I reach for my phone.

"Don't." He tersely grabs my wrist.

"You need help."

"I've been through worse Tess. I'm fine." The scary thing was he really believed it. He was trapped within a position that placed him in danger, that made him a threat to others as well.

"I don't think you enjoy hurting other people Kalen. At least the man I love doesn't."

"Stay out it Tessa." Because that's how this always worked. I didn't interfere with the mafia business, I didn't interfere with his work. Never had it brought him home like this, and I didn't want it to again.

"I know that's not just your blood. Kalen, please you don't have to do this."

"It's all I've ever known Tess. I can't do anything else."

"What about basketball?" He always dreamed of going pro.

He barks out a humourless laugh. "I'm not good enough Tess, and besides it's too late. This is my life. You accepted that."

"Before you came home like this. Before you were bleeding and hurt and...you could have died. You realise that right, you could have died, and then what? I would just sit waiting for you come home whilst you bleed out in the streets. And if we get married, have kids? What am I supposed to do then? If you die, I won't survive Kalen? I won't I'm so compelled to you now, I need you to love and I can't live without..."

I break into violent sobs, my body violently racketing we they consume my body whole. Kalen quickly wraps his arms around me as if to block out the overwhelming pain that struck me but it's too late.

A life without him isn't worth living.

"Baby Shh," I feel his own tears splash against my skin. "I'm sorry Tess, I'm so f*****g sorry." I don't need him to be sorry, I just need him safe.

"Please Kalen, my heart can't take anymore."

My voice is barely audible, my throat all scratchy and hurt, that can't speak as he lifts me up. My legs straddle his waist on instinct, and he pushes me down into his shoulder until my heads is resting against the crook of his neck.

I listen to his heavy footsteps pounding against the oak floorboards. Soon the sound dissipates, turning into soft whispers as oak merged to carpet and carpet into tiles.

The shower groans as it's switched on. A heavy spray belts down, and I feel a sense of emptiness as one of his hand's leaves my body to test the water.

He sets me on my feet, then wrenches off his bloody clothes. Normally I'm transfixed by his marbleised body but today it only makes me weep more.

Bruises mark his body like tattoos. His legs, his chest, his back, even his ass are all pained by abuse. "How much does it hurt?" I'm just numb now. To everything.

"Not much." He winces as I touch one. "Fine a lot. I'll be alright though." Then his gaze turns predatory as he eyes my body.

My thin silk nightie, stained with blood and dirt. Instead of pulling it off me, he shreds it, never to be revived.

I'm butt naked and blood still sticks to me. I feel disgusting, sinful even.

Kalen gently guides me into the shower. The hot water beats down on me, causing the blood to wash away, yet still I feel dirty. "Tessa?" He sounds so worried about. He shouldn't be. It should be me cleaning him, helping him.

I'm weak.

"Kale." I turn and pull him into me. The water cascades down us both, turning red at our feet as it circles into the drain. I can't stop staring at all the bruises. It's never ending torture.

"Hey," He dips his finger underneath my chin, lifting it up. "I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

I can't speak. I don't know how.

Instead I sink my knees, knowing this will make him feel better. "Tessa don't..."

I look up at him, my powerful domineering fiancé. He sees the desperation in my eyes, the need I have to give him this and he rests back, his hand encouragingly rubbing my head.

His c**k is semi hard but within a few strokes it's erect and powerful. I brush a delicate kiss to the tip and then suck gently. He groans, leaning further back to grip the wall.

There's something fulfilling in this for me too. His grunts, his groans, the sound of my name spilling from his lips like a prayer...it's empowering.

Within minutes, I feel his c**k twitching inside my mouth, and I reach down to squeeze his balls, letting his release overpower his mind. "f**k!" He groans, warm c*m filling my mouth, whilst I still stroke him to the end.

His body is still jittering as he pulls me to my feet. There's a passion in his eyes that I know all too well, so I shove him back instead.

"We can't fuck."

"Why not?" He practically growls.

"You're hurt." I spit the words with so much venom he almost flinches. Then his gaze softens.

"I can still make love to you Tess." He sighs when I don't move. "Just let me feel something else other than pain. Please,"

I admit I want to have s*x with him. It's the connection with need after so much grief tonight but I really don't want to hurt him more.

Eying my reluctance, he steps forward, a dark shadow eclipsing any reasonable doubt inside of me and dips his hand beneath my legs. I moan instantly.

He smirks and suddenly we're us again.

My back slams against the wall, the violence his gentleness as he pushes inside of me slowly. Crying out, I cling to his shoulders, where no bruises lurk and let him slowly f**k me.

It starts with one leg slung over his waist and then suddenly it's both of them, cradled atop his elbow whilst my body is practically folded in half.

I don't have the energy to tell him to not hurt himself. I'm screaming, he's groaning, the two of us f*****g each other with equal vigour and letting our lust cloud pain.

Kalen's body sinks into mine, his head on my shoulder.

"Tess, Tess, Tess," He repeats over and over as wet tears splash down to soak my shoulder.

"It's okay Kalen, it's okay."

"Don't leave me. I can't survive if you leave me. Please don't..." It breaks my heart.

I know I can't watch him come home like this again. I know I can't ask him to leave his job. I can't live without him.

"I'm here Kalen. I'm right here." I just didn't know if I could do this again.

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A/N: What do you think Tessa should do??

Thoughts on the steamy scene??