My Unknown Wolf

Chapter 5 - So I'm not crazy?

Emerson’s POV 

“You know these sessions would go a lot easier if you talk to me, Emerson.” Dr Milton advised, trying to hide the frustration in his voice but failing. 

I rolled my eyes as I stared out the window of his boring office and tried to enjoy at least having a view of the beach. We had been doing the same dance for the last two weeks. He talked, and I stared at the waves lapping against the shoreline and ignored him. I tried in the beginning, I tried to explain my side, but no one wanted to listen. After I passed out at the party, Grayson had told everyone that I had attacked him for no reason, and of course, they had believed him. Dr Milton had told me that he was graciously no pressing charges against me. I swear if I could get my hands around that guy right now, I would kill him, and I would enjoy every minute of it. 

Instead, I got to enjoy wearing grey sweatpants, a t-shirt and a hoodie every day, eat shitty, bland food and enjoy the company of Dr Milton in twice a day therapy sessions. 

“What’s the point?” I queried, “It’s not like you guys will believe me anyway. So what am I still doing here anyway? My three-day hold is over.” 

I heard him sigh from his desk, “both your parents and I agree that this is the best place for you. The nurses tell me that you are still talking to yourself. Did you want to talk about who are you talking to?"

I turned towards him and glared, “Is it a problem for me to try and work out my problems aloud?” 

I was trying to cover for myself. The voice had not left me alone the entire time that I had been here, but I knew if I told him I was telling a voice in my head repeatedly to shut up and leave me alone, I would never be getting out of here. 

His notebook slammed shut, “Well, our time is up. I will see you this afternoon at two.” 

I leapt off his couch as quickly as possible and left his office, making my way through the hallways until I was in the safety of my room. When I say my room, it was just a cold space with a single bed and bedside table. No personal belongings, no warmth. I couldn’t even lose myself sketching because I wasn’t allowed any pencils as they are considered a weapon. This place was beyond a joke. 

“We need to get out of here by tonight.” The voice informed me again. 

I groaned in frustration, “can you leave me alone? You are the reason I am in here.” 

She had been saying the same thing since the day I arrived. It was like she was on a count down, but to what, I had no idea. 

“They wouldn’t catch you talking to yourself if you spoke to me by thinking and not talking out loud.” She explained. “

What would be better is if you just shut up and leave me alone. I had a normal life before you.” I thought. “

Yes!” She exclaimed, “perfect, and I am a part of you. I couldn’t leave you alone even if I wanted to. But I’m serious, tonight is the full moon, and if we don’t get out of here, the staff will see our shift, and instead of being locked in a psych ward, we will be in some scientists lab being studied and cut open. Human beings will not be able to deal with the supernatural world.”  

“Maybe I should tell Dr Milton about you?” I threatened, “maybe I am crazy. Werewolves do not exist.” 

She growled at me, “You are not crazy, I am your wolf, and when we get out of here, I can prove it. Plus, do you think you’re getting out of here any other way? You heard him your parents think it’s a good idea for you to stay here, do you think they want you embarrassing them any further for a while. I know you did what you had to, and if we had already gone through our change, I would have taken over and done worse than you did, but we are not getting out of here unless we make it happen ourselves.” 

I knew that the voice was right. My parents had not even come to visit me in the whole two weeks that I had been here. They hadn’t even bothered to call. Their whole world was about appearances, and what I had done at my parent had embarrassed them in front of everyone who meant anything in New York. They would try to keep me in here for as long as it took for the scandal to be over, and who knew how long that would take. 

I sighed internally, “If I believed you, and I’m not saying I do. What would you suggest we do?” 

“I have an idea, but I don’t think you are going to like it.”It warned. 

The rest of the day passed without incident. I went to my afternoon session with Dr Milton and spent the rest of the afternoon going through the voices plan over and over again. It was crazy, and I was even crazier for listening to it and agreeing to try it. The closer it got to enacting the plan, the more nervous I got. 

The majority of the staff left at five in the afternoon, and the night staff took over, which was significantly less in numbers. I stayed in my room during dinner and the after-dinner movie, just biding my time. As it got later in the evening, I felt like I had electricity coursing through my body. 

“What is happening to me?” I asked the voice as I had no one else to ask. 

“It’s the full moon.” It explained, “your body is getting ready to go through the change, I’m trying to hold it off as long as I can, but we need to get out of here soon before it’s too late.” 

Our conversation was halted when one of the night nurses burst into the room with a scowl on her face and a tray of food in her hand. The expression on her face reminded me of Truchbull from Matilda. Thankfully that was their only similarity, or this crazy plan the voice had come up with wouldn’t have worked. 

“You are not allowed to skip meals, and I will stand here until you eat every mouthful. I don’t care what sort of pampered life you had outside these, but you are in my house now and will do as I say. If you don’t, I will shove it down your throat.” She threatened as she placed the tray on the end of my bed. 

I believed her. It was what she had done to me the first night I was here and didn’t eat. I knew if I skipped dinner, she would come in here. She wouldn’t be able to help herself. My hand rested on the edge of the tray, and I hesitated. I didn’t know if I could do this. 

“You can do this.” The voice urged, “you need to do this.” 

The nurse hovered over me, “Pick up that spoon and start eating now.” 

I took a deep breath before I grabbed the tray and swung it as hard as I could into the side of her head, and watched her crumble to the floor.

  “Oh s**t! Did I kill her?” I asked, ready to start crying. 

“Relax”, the voice reassured me, “her chest is still moving. She’s fine, just having a well-deserved nap. Now get to work.” 

I got up and quickly cleaned up the food that had spilled when I picked up the tray. Then, I rushed as fast as I could and stripped her of her uniform. Thankfully she was roughly the same height as I was, she was a little bigger, but I made the clothes work. After taking her hair out of the tight bun she always wore and replicated it on my own hair, I pulled back the sheets on my bed and picked her up, dumping her on the mattress with her back to the door. Once I pulled the blanket up as high as I could, I stood back and studied my work. To someone taking a quick look, it would look like I had just turned in early for the night. 

I placed the empty dishes back on the tray and picked them up, walking over to the door, taking a deep breath to steady my nerves. “I can’t do this.” 

“It’s this or a lab getting experimented on. I know you don’t believe me, but please trust me until I can prove it to you,” It pleaded, “we are running out of time.”

 What was happening to my body wasn’t normal, the feeling was getting stronger and stronger, and every fibre of my being told me to trust this voice. I slowly opened the door, checking the coast was clear before I left. I spent the last week studying this place and knew where every camera was and made sure I kept my face turned away from them. To the staff in security, I could pass for the nurse as long as they never saw my face.  I dumped the tray on an empty food cart and headed straight towards the entrance, which was thankfully not manned at night. With the electronic locks that could only be accessed via key card and the cameras everywhere, they thought there was no chance of escape.  

When I got to the door, I pulled the nurse’s access card and held it against the reader until I heard the beep, and the lock on the door clicked open. I pushed it open and walked through. As much as I wanted to run out of there as fast as possible, there were still cameras monitoring the hallways until you made it to the front door.  Once I was outside, I dumped the nurse's keys, access card and wallet, minus some cash to help me out and ran as fast as possible. I needed to put as much distance between myself and this hell hole as I could. Being out in the night air made my body feel worse. “

It’s because we are out in the moonlight.” The voice explained, “we need to get somewhere private. I do not know how much longer I can hold off the change.” 

It took me a little while to get my bearings, but it turned out that this place was close to my parents’ summer house. I spent most of my childhood summers playing on and exploring this stretch of beach. 

“There is a hidden cave not far from here. I used to hide there when I was a child.” I told it. “

Yes,” She exclaimed, “I know the one you are talking about it will be perfect, but we need to get there fast.” 

I took off as quickly as I could. Spending my high school days running and training had meant that I was built for this. It wasn’t long before I made it there. It was colder and darker than I remember, but then I was used to going there in the middle of the day. There was an opening on the roof of the cave that made a natural skylight which always bought in the light, in this case, the moonlight. 

“You need to take off all of your clothes.” It commanded. “

ARE YOU KIDDING” I queried, my voice filled with shock and disbelief, “It’s freezing in here.” “

It’s either that or you rip your clothes during the change, and you will be walking down the beach naked until you find some new ones. Now hurry up, god damn it, I’m holding on by a thread here.”  

“Alright, alright, no need to get snippy about it.” I countered and started to remove the nurse’s uniform and my undergarments, dropping them on the sand beneath me.  

I waited, not sure what to do next, “Are you happy now? I’ve assaulted a nurse, escaped a psychiatric facility, and am now standing in the middle of a very cold cave without a stitch of clothing on. I am seriously crazy. I am a crazy person and need to march my way back to that place and check-in for good.” 

“You are not crazy, and I am about to prove it”, the voice assured me, “but I need to warn you. Shifting for the first time will hurt, but you need to relax and let it happen. You cannot fight me.” 

I was about to give up and put the clothes on and walk back to the facility and turn myself in, but the next thing I knew, I felt a sharp pain in my leg, and it felt like I dislocated my knee. I screamed in pain and fell to the ground. Thankfully the sand softened the fall. But, unfortunately, before I had even had a chance to get over the initial pain, another all-mighty crack rang out, and my other knee joint popped out of place. It wasn’t long until my shoulder joints followed.  

I leaned forward, crying and trying to breathe through the pain. “What is happening to me?” 

“What I have been telling you for the last two weeks would happen; you are shifting into your wolf.” The voice growled out, “You need to give in Emmy, I am trying to make this go as quickly as possible, but you are fighting the pain every step of the way. Now breathe, damn it and relax.” 

I whimpered softly as I tried to steady my breathing as I felt every vertebra in my back break and shift followed my ribs. Finally, I closed my eyes, praying that I would die from this pain and that it would all end.  Suddenly it all stopped. Had my wish been answered? Was I dead? I carefully opened my eyes and lifted my head, but the weight felt different. My body didn’t feel like my own. 

“That’s cause it’s mine.” The voice called out. 

I looked down and saw a set of furry paws lying in front of me instead of my hands. What the hell. I tried to stand up, but it wasn't easy to balance on four legs instead of two arms and two legs. Once I was up on my four legs, feeling like a toddler learning to walk for the first time, I took a few shaky steps before turning my head and taking in the ash blonde furry body and tail behind me. 

“I’m a wolf,” I exclaimed in my mind, 

The voice snorted in disgust, “now do you believe me? And now that I have proved myself, I would be grateful if you could call me by my real name, Ruby.” 

I heard a small whine come out of my mouth, “I’m so sorry I didn’t believe you, Ruby. What do we do now?” 

“From your memories, I know that this part of the beach is pretty hidden from the road and not explored too much at night. So what do you say to me taking over, and we go for a little run so you can get to know your wolf form?” She suggested. 

“How do I do that?”  “When you feel my presence pushing forward, don’t fight it. Let it happen. I promise I will keep us safe.” She answered. 

When I felt her pushing forward in my mind and did what she asked, and before I knew it, I felt like a spectator in my own body, well, I guess in this case, it was her body, not mine. It was such a rush when she took off and went running along the beach at top speed. I had always love to run, and now I guess I knew why. She spent hours playing along the waterfront before she made her way back to our hiding spot. 

“Now, all you do is have to think about your human form, and the change will occur.” She instructed. I did as she advised and slowly felt my bones crack and shift. Before I knew it, I was back in my human form and very, very cold. The wind coming off the water and into the cave was freezing.  

I quickly got dressed again and found a quiet place further back in the cave out of the breeze to rest. Tomorrow was another day, and I would come up with a plan then.  I curled up on the sandy floor, using the nurse's jacket as a pillow and closed my eyes. 

“Good night Ruby.” I thought as I yawned out loudly. 

“Good night Emmy.”