Damien...
1016 Words
Hello stranger...
Why am I doing this? Well because if I don't tell someone about what I'm going through right now I might lose it. My life is pretty f****d up, my parents are barely home and when they are I just get reminded of how little they care of me.Steve would bet anything that I was an accident, he's my best friend by the way. I met him... s**t where did I meet him? Well I guess he's the kind of person that have been so long in your life you barely remember not being with them. I was a pretty shy kid back then but Steve included me in his g**g called "The death crew" and after that I went everywhere with them. We're all trouble makers, I guess were just bored and want to give life a new perspective you know?
Everything was great until middle school when one of the g**g got a hold of w**d from his cousin, after that everything went overboard and the worse thing was that we were so forgotten from our families that we had no limits. I really don't want to get to deep into the details but I have to...
Few years later we discovered s*x and it became like some kind of game for us, and hell those weren't proud moments. I ended up with the most toxic girl ever, she's really pretty and all but she made my life harder to live. She was the worst influence ever, all she wanted to do was drink, get high and have s*x. At the beginning I thought I also wanted that but I slowly realized that I had broken the biggest promise I had ever made, you see I had a brother once and he had to put up with my unemployed and dunk father everyday while my mom was working her a*s of. He was 16 when I was born and he barely had the will to live, he had been though so much the only thing he wanted was a break from his miserable life. A day before it happened he took me to my favorite restaurant and made me promise that I wouldn't end up like dad, I was six so I didn't understand s**t of what he was saying but he was my brother and the last thing I wanted was to let him down so I promised him. After that he dropped me at our house and gave me the biggest hug ever, when he letted go of me I saw that there were tears in his eyes, he took of his leather jacket and handed it to me "Promise to take care of it" I nodded " I'm gonna miss you kiddo" he said while he took one last glimpse at me. The last memory I have is of him ridding his car and disappearing, I asume he's dead but I'm still not ready to face it.
I had broken that f*****g promise, the only thing that kept my brother alive in my memories and now its gone...
I broke up with Marianne and disappeared with Steve for a while, I was so f*****g disappointed of myself I could barely stare at my reflection and that promise was so f*****g important that I was going to kill myself if it wasn't for Steve who stopped me. I got through my depression and came back, I thought that I would forget everything but I was wrong. That b***h Marianne made my life imposible just because I broke up with her, I couldn't take it anymore so the boys helped me devise a plan to get me expelled.
After that I felt f*****g free which was really cool. On my first day on the other school the crew got reunited by some parking spot and everything was cool until that shy girl of hazel eyes came. She was so f*****g beautiful and her not knowing it made her even more cute, I got lucky because my place was just beside her and I think I might of freaked her out because I didn't stop staring at her but I couldn't help it. I went to sleep thinking about her, I don't know but something about her makes me smile every time . And she's really f*****g smart too, I think she has the highest grades of the entire class plus she knows spanish, language that I didn't care of learning until she was assigned to teach me. I know that this might sound pretty quick because I just met her and all that s**t but I really don't want to let her down, I want her to like me as much as I do. So I decided to hand her a paper with my number, lets see if she dares to call.After that I felt f*****g free which was really cool. On my first day on the other school the crew got reunited by some parking spot and everything was cool until that shy girl of hazel eyes came. She was so f*****g beautiful and her not knowing it made her even more cute, I got lucky because my place was just beside her and I think I might of freaked her out because I didn't stop staring at her but I couldn't help it. I went to sleep thinking about her, I don't know but something about her makes me smile every time . And she's really f*****g smart too, I think she has the highest grades of the entire class plus she knows spanish, language that I didn't care of learning until she was assigned to teach me. I know that this might sound pretty quick because I just met her and all that s**t but I really don't want to let her down, I want her to like me as much as I do. So I decided to hand her a paper with my number, lets see if she dares to call.
Shit the phone is ringing, I think its her...
Gotta go, bye
The f****d up kid:)
- Writer
