Redeeming Heart

Bad Sportsmanship

Jonah might be a pain in my arse but he definitely had skill on the ice but he didn’t know how to use it probably or learned how to use it to his advantage. It was almost as if fear was holding him back but to know what that fear was, is a mystery.

My mind rushed back to Jonah when I had to watch one of his teammates shove him up against the glass, laughing when Jonah lost his footing before meeting the ice.

I wasn’t much experienced when it came to ice hockey but the rules were pretty basic and clear enough to understand, but the coach was too busy mingling with the parents that he missed out on his team not acting like one.  

I know this was only meant to be practice and it was hard keeping my mouth shut when all I wanted to do was to strangle that boy. All I could do was patiently watch on until the coach dismiss their practising session.

The coach met my eyes when I met Jonah at the railing to help him over and I think it was pretty clear on my face that I wasn’t happy with his coaching tactics.

I get it that it is a contact sport and one needs to be tough out there, heck I know what it feels like to be one of those ruthless players but I still showed respect towards my fellow teammates and opposition.  

“What the hell was that?” I questioned Jonah, referring to the boy who mistreated him.

Jonah just shrugged before sitting down and lowering his head in shame when the boys looked at him and laughed.

“It’s nothing.” He mumbled but I sensed he wanted to say something different instead.

“Who is that boy who shoved you?” I asked, lowering my voice as I squatted down to help him with his skates as he haven’t even started to take them off.

“Nicky. He is our centre and the captain.” Jonah answered. “He doesn’t like me very much and has told me that I don’t belong here.”

“Does he always do that?” I questioned

He nodded. “But it’s only part of becoming stronger and better at it.”

Was he for real right now? His so-called team hasn’t even let him touch god damn puck all through practice. All they cared about was treating him like a piece of meat out there.

“Really? Then why does it look like you hate it out there and get scared whenever that boy nears you?” I questioned, shoving his things into his bag and pushing to my feet.

“I don’t want to make a scene or make things worse.”

Unbelievable.

“That’s not how it is meant to work,” I said sitting back down next to him.

“What would you have done?” He asked.

I smiled when memories fogged my brain from when I used to be in control of my anger and just normal feelings. I memorized the details of my mother always standing on the sideline cheering me on and it gave me strength and motivation to do what I knew best.

I didn’t let anyone get away after messing with me. I could stand my ground and take them on professionally without any fists involved.

“Give him twice as hell,” I answered. Jonah wasn’t anything like me. He hated conflict and seemed to always run away from it while I faced it head-on. Sometimes I was the one who started it but I’ve learned to never back down from anything.

“Your father has told me the story of why you don’t play hockey anymore,” Jonah noted as if he truly knows the reason behind it.

“My father lies to everyone because he can’t accept the truth, Jonah,” I remarked, standing up and gathering our stuff.

“But you’ve given up.” He said standing up. His words surprised me and for a moment all I could do was stare at him.

“I am not saying you should. If you are passionate about ice hockey and feels like you can't live without it, then I suggest you go for it but don’t let anyone take it from you. Because if you do, you will never get it back.” I started to walk when I realized that Meredith must probably be waiting for us.

“Come on, your mom must be here already,” I said, gesturing for him to go and I will follow.

The ice hockey leagues were showing up for their practice and while everyone else stayed we had to leave as my shift was starting soon—not like I was looking forward to it.

Aunt Maggie is my mother’s younger sister and shares a hell of a lot of a resemblance to my mother. I haven’t seen her since the funeral and I was hoping it would stay like that for a while until I could face reality without having a meltdown.

I was avoiding getting stumbled into by the big, tough players of the Gladiator ice hockey team who made their way past us before making their way onto the ice but I missed one when I stumbled into his big, wide and tones chest.

“Sorry.” I apologized trying to push past him but his voice caught my attention when he spoke.

“First time finding you here.”

I raised my head and took a step back to create some space.

His eyes were quite captivating and I wondered if the rumour about grey eyes were true. Experts say that they are rarer than green eyes and can change colour from the clothes you are wearing and express what kind of mood you are in. I kind of wondered if the rumours were true.

“Yeah, I really don’t have much of a choice,” I commented.

“Doesn’t sound like we are doing a good job at impressing you,” Brandon remarked with an amused glint in his eyes.

Jonah showed his excitement when he greeted Brandon and they started talking about practice. If he only can be this confident all the time out there on the ice, he will even become a better player than Brandon, and Brandon was the best. No doubt about it even if it was hard to admit.

I looked out the door when I noticed Meredith’s car and then heard the horn. “Hey, your mom is here. I still have to get to work.” I said to Jonah getting him to stop talking to Brandon so that we can leave.

“See you around, Brandon!” Jonah said before running out to get to his mom.

“Sasha.” I turned to look at Brandon.

“I saw what happened out there,” Brandon said making me frown.

He must have probably sensed my confusion. “Getting smashed into the glass.”

I nodded. “Yeah, he thinks it is part of becoming a better player.”

“He is going to keep getting smashed out there if he doesn’t fight back,” Brandon informed me and I felt like laughing.

“Why don’t you tell him that since you are his favourite player? He doesn’t listen to a has-been.” I turned and walked away.

I shoved Jonah’s bags into the back before sliding in on the backseat. “Hey, sorry about that.” I apologized, strapping in.

Meredith smiled at me and nodded.

“Who was that?” She then asked and I was hoping she wasn’t asking me but to my dismay I caught her looking at me through the rearview mirror.

“Jonah’s hero,” I mumbled, dragging my eyes away from her and decided to stare out the window when I found the outside world more interesting.

“Yeah, Sasha broke his girlfriend’s nose.” I just shook my head and rolled my eyes at Jonah’s comment.

“You two know each other?” She then asked.

“Not personally. He went to the same high school as me.” How he remembered my name is a mystery to me. I was an outcast while he was the prince. Everyone craved to be his friend and be part of his group.

Not that I was bothered by being a nobody in school. My sport used to mean everything to me and over the years my passion faded away when my mother became ill and all I started to care about was being with her especially when the doctors told us to start saying our goodbyes.

I know she was disappointed in me for quitting something that I truly desired and loved. She always pushed me to become a better person and was at every practice and game-no matter how ill she felt.

One day, I lost it all when I had to watch her go down during one of my games.

I could never go out there on the field ever again with the memories stuck to my brain. I see that day replaying over and over in my mind whenever I hold a hockey stick between my hands.

Meredith and Jonah haven’t noticed that I drifted off into my own little world as they were talking about his day.

I just felt the car come to a stop when she pulled up in front of Aunt Maggie’s bar. “Should I come and pick you up after your shift is done?” Meredith asked, turning in her seat.

“No, I am sure Aunt Maggie would give me a ride home and if she doesn’t, I have my wheels.” I showed her my skateboard before getting out.

I didn’t know what to expect when I go in there and how many of us will react to seeing each other again after my mother’s passing.

It was hard enough for her for having to live through my mother’s pain since they were children and when there was nothing she could have done for my mom.

My mom has been ill her whole life and she was even told she wouldn’t make it to twenty but my mother broke that circle when she made it all the way to thirty.

She was a fighter while I was weakling.