“What was that?” a feminine voice giggled in the depths of the darkness surrounding me.
Her question was followed by chants, no...phrases, phrases I had once spoken as Arusei, to/or about Arusei.
‘Gods, but were you not too much?’
‘You were too extreme.’
‘…cruel.’
‘…mean spirited!’
‘….’
The words overlapped each other as their uttered frequency increased till finally, there was no individual phrase left to isolate…all of it simply sounded like chatter whose intensity rose deafeningly until...
“Do you see now…?” the voice caused a dissipation of the chatter, “____ _____ __ ___ ____, __, ___ ____ _____ ____ ___ ____...”
*
*
*
My eyes flew open to meet white marble tiles and white heels paired with a white...dress?
‘What the-?’
I raised my bowed head only to instantly lower it as my gaze met the Emperor's russet brown.
'Crap!'
“Child? What made your gaze meet mine without permission?” The Emperor asked.
It was astounding, the clarity my mind held.
‘Am I not on drugs? Rather…’
My hands dropped from their position of keeping my dress in the curtsy stance to caress my neck.
'Gods, but I am still alive!? My head still steadily in its place... is this a dream?'
'No…'
The uncomfortable sensation of holding too much-unused mana grated my belly.
It felt too realistic to dismiss, in fact…It was akin to one of the first sensations I felt when I first appeared here.
Tears could have easily claimed me. However, had the man who had sentenced me to death not asked a question?
Indeed, it is his voice; however, when had I put on these rich garments?
I stopped wearing white after leaving the Royal Academy.
'What the hell is going on?'
“Forgive my impertinence, your majesty,” the words flowed easily, having been accustomed to kissing noble asses, “my nervousness over our first meeting got the better of me.”
Please let this be our first meeting; otherwise, I may very well have to claim amnesia.
I held my breath for fear of being reprimanded further; however, a deep chortle filled the room contrary to my expectations.
“Rise, young one.”
‘Why the hell are my hands so tiny?’
I raised my head, finally allowed to meet the piercing brown of his steady gaze. The pairing was magnificent as his eyes matched the dull brown sheen of his hair; however, the crown prince who stood beside him had his mother's silver-white hair and piercing blue gaze.
'Wait, the Prince?'
'Why does he resemble a teenager?'
-Ding!-
A sound jolted me and in letters too bold to ignore, shaped in literature, not of this world, etched:
{The player has lost one of their lives}
{The playthrough has been reset from checkpoint}
'Huh?'
'Play what?'
'Game?'
Ah, freaking hell! Why? Why is the game system that has been quiet since my arrival acting up now? Why not when I cried that I wished to log out!?
'What is this???'
'Log out!'
The screen did nothing at my instruction, rather at my internally yelled command.
'Log out, please!!'
Still, nothing.
Is it because I died in real life, so I have nothing to return to?
Still…I took a deep breath then gazed at my arm.
The imprint of the Yggdrasil was still there, meaning that I was still Arusei Evergreen Alpensa, the game’s freaking villainess!
“I greet the sun of the empire with humility and grace, may the light shine in your favour.” I curtsied then followed his command despite the turmoil swarming inside my being.
“For the bravery and heroism of rescuing Oakwood village from constant attacks by pirates, and for installing a safe fort for defence, what gift do you wish from the Empire?”
'Again, this question.'
The first time I was asked this, rather, in my previous life, my father, Marquis Alpensa, instructed me to wish for the Prince’s hand. Of course, I rejected his words, but he warned that the Emperor would try and assassinate me as my genius would only prove dangerous in the future. Especially if I were to get engaged to an anti-imperialist family.
So he instead promised that he would aid me in breaking off the engagement if I was dissatisfied after five years…that he was on my side…forever, and always on my side.
Oh, but gods, my ignorance was really astounding because I believed him, even as I walked to my death, I believed he would throw himself to the Emperor and plead mercy; Even if the pleas would have gone unheeded, I thought that he would do something…anything!
'Gods, anything would have…'
I mean, he called me his daughter?!
But…sweet words are so easily said, should I not learn from my elders?
If the Emperor wishes to assassinate me for insubordination, for my outright refusal to join his dinner table, so be it.
Finish my remaining lives or whatever because I am not going through any of that once again.
'I will never, ever put my life in another's hands.'
“Land!”
A deafening silence filled the room at my answer.
“What?” the Emperor frowned.
Of course. He had spoken to my father prior, so in his mind, he understood that my request would be to become the crown princess.
“This humble civil servant wishes only for land.”
“Land? Are you not in school?” the Emperor's frown deepened, “What use does a child have for land? Not to mention you are the Marquis’ only heir, are you not being too greedy?”
'Right…this?'
Regina has yet to become publicly known.
“As you most certainly know, I am not the Marquis’s real daughter.”
“Have you not been adopted?”
“I have.”
“Then what is the fuss?”
“However, your imperial majesty, it is you that asked for my wish.”
The sneer on his face could not be hidden or interpreted otherwise, but that was not where my focus was. It was on the viridian screen before me.
{Congratulations on completing the tutorial}
'Tuto- what?'
But it was no use; the words were vanishing slowly as though their work was complete when they had given me no clarification on areas I wished to explore.
I couldn’t yell after it, for I would be the one to bear the actions’ consequences. However, why? Why would it leave without aiding or providing any information on why I have been sent back to the last ‘checkpoint’? To where my life had taken an unbreakable turn? Or, perhaps that was too much to ask. If so, then, why? Why the hell had it said ‘tutorial’ as though…as though it anticipated my failure? Were the routes fixed? Were the people before me only characters?
'No…please don’t leave…'
But just like that, despite every protest held in my being, it was gone.
Leaving me under the mercy of the council, the insecure Emperor and the Prince.
“So you wish for land?” the Emperor asked his gaze on the council around the room.
His voice sounded edgier, as though he was asking the question a second time.
If I remember the first event correctly, the last time I announced that I wished for the engagement, some council members protested, meaning the arrangement was only between the Emperor and Marquis.
“But your deed is too astonishing to settle only for land; surely I can give you more than just land.” He proceeded, clearly tired of humouring my silence. “In fact, my son, Prince Étienne, you know him from more than school, I presume, do you not?”
'So that is it...'
'You intend to make everything seem as though it stems from me.'
“Of course, I know his imperial highness, the crown prince,” I answered, then bowed.
'I know him even better than he knows himself.'
Still, I cannot permit my mind to stray too far; If I were to break down at my stupidity, I am uncertain if I would be able to stand again.
The Emperor tapped his finger on his armrest impatiently when I did not bite his bait. So, instead, he grew more precise in his intentions.
“You are around the same age as he, are you not? So why do I not grant you the entire continent? You could settle for a life as the crown princess?”
I turned to the Prince, but his gaze was just as dull as ever.
'Gods, nothing but Regina’s can amuse you...huh, Étienne? '
I turned my gaze away before more memories of him flooded inappropriately. I needn’t hold on to useless fancies.
“The title of crown princess sounds wonderful.” I began, widening my gaze in a way that was sure to elicit pity from those superficial enough to believe themselves above me, “However, I am the daughter of a p********e; will that be forgiven?”
The Emperor flinched
Of course, it was not acceptable. In truth, it was near blasphemous that a commoner rule the Empire, let alone those deemed less than peasants.
In the past, I literally had to cling to the Emperor's power just to be accepted as the crown princess, let alone maintain dignity in high society.
Constantly, nobles would host tea parties only to insult me with fine words as though my birth made me a simpleton who could not distinguish between kindness and mockery.
I could hardly believe the real Arusei lived that way, friendless as opposed to I, who loved being in the company of others.
No, I will not once again try to defend my rights to be acknowledged as human by people who have never wondered if they would survive past the night because a debt collector with leering eyes for mother kept coming at odd hours.
It was hellish living as the six-year-old Arusei, so when mother contracted s******s and realised that I would remain in her world should she die, she asked the Marquis, an old friend, for help.
A loud cough escaped the Prince, but it was hard to tell if it was a peal of stifled laughter.
He was not the only child, nor was he the eldest or the rightful heir; he was simply the child of the most beloved concubine, and she, for whatever reason, held the Emperor’s fancy.
“I told you not to put yourself down like that.”
“I am sorry, it is that so often I have been asked to not forget myself-,”
“Who would dare challenge the crown princess!?” he roared through the room, and his entire council bowed.
'f**k, this isn’t working.'
“There, see? None in this room will challenge you.” He said, then placed his ringed hand back on his rest.
“Your imperial majesty, I have no need for a title; I have already grown accustomed to a quiet life.”
The royal classes were a pain in the ass, plus the amount of abuse I had to take from ‘teachers’ was downright illegal.
“I simply wish for land to call my own, that one day, I may pass it on to my children and their children. That even if luck suddenly abandons me, I still have a bed to rest on.”
“You say that as though you and the Marquis are on ill terms?”
He was getting irritated.
“Lord Alpensa, do you whip this child when others avert their gaze?”
“Never, your imperial majesty.”
“Child?” he began, “is there a reason you find no security in your father’s wealth.”
'I am so gonna be killed.'
“Your majesty, forgive this lowly child for not dreaming vast enough. However, I long to marry a man of my choosing rather than marry for the magnitude of their inheritance. It is not that I do not appreciate your gift; it is that truly my heart is already set on a simpler life.”
The Emperor's nostrils flared when he stomped his golden staff on the ground.
“I will give you a week to reconsider, that you may understand more fully the childish words you utter.” He said, “If I hear nothing of you seeking my audience till then, I will grant you the land you so desire. May blessings and harmony lead your way.”
Even as he offered the blessing, the hardness of his gaze held.
“I would ask for nothing more, your imperial majesty. May the light that is within guide your path.”
'I am so dead.'