Siobhan, The goddess' handmaiden

2. Library

Siobhan is wandering the halls of the palace. The goddess told her she doesn’t need her today, so she’s got nothing to do. All the rooms are empty, most even missing the doors. There is not a living soul here, as far as she can tell. The connection to the goddess works both ways, Siobhan just knows where she is without trying. Then she finally comes up to a door that looks promising. The ornaments are faded, but the signs are still there. It’s a library. She pushes the door lightly and nothing happens. Siobhan frowns. Why would this be locked when nothing else is?

She leans into the door with everything she has and it eventually creaks open. The sound echoes over the empty halls. It sends shivers down her body and she looks around herself in fear. Will someone come running telling her that she’s not supposed to be here? Nothing happens for a full minute and she decides that nothing will. Going inside, a whole new world opens up for her. Long rows of bookshelves that end by the huge windows. She looks up and the vaulted ceiling is so high up that she has to crane her neck to be able to see it. Four stories of balconies with more books are above her, but she can’t see any stairs. How do you get up there, she wonders.

For now she can be content browsing the shelves down here. The books are old, but in great shape. She doesn’t read Greek, but she recognises it. Will there be something she can read?

“The other side of the library might be more to your liking,” Nakir says behind her and she jumps. How did he sneak up on her? She never heard him come.

“You scared me to death!” Siobhan glares at him.

“You’re already dead, you can’t die again,” he chuckles. At least he didn’t lose his macabre sense of humour.

“Ha, ha,” she fakes laughter. “What’s on the other side?”

“Books you can actually understand. We have Latin and even English on that side. Ery likes Shakespear,” he tells her.

“Anything modern?” Siobhan looks over the hand bound books.

“No,” he shakes his head. “Have fun with the classics.”

“I might as well, I have nothing else to do,” Siobhan answers. When she doesn’t hear anything from him, she turns around to find herself all alone again. He just left without saying anything. Siobhan shrugs. It’s not like she expected anything from Nakir. He does what he pleases and she’s just a servant. Not a role she ever imagined herself in, but it could have been worse. She dreaded a fate much worse than this.

Siobhan selects the Divine Comedy and finds a place for herself on the windowsill. The view out is obscured by the darkness, but she can see a tower. No lights anywhere in any of the windows she can see. The ground is paved and barren as far as she can peer into the darkness. She doesn’t wish to go out at all. The goddess warned her not to leave, but she didn’t have to. What lies outside is not inviting at all. Siobhan realises the irony in her reading choice so she smiles. She always loved to read, it doesn’t have to change now.

She gets lost in the book for hours. The only measurement of time is the number of pages she has read. Nothing changes outside, nobody else shows up to disturb her peace. A pang of longing squeezes her heart. She wants to tell Nina all about this amazing library, but she’ll never see her daughter again. Nakir gave Nina a feather, but Siobhan knows she’ll never use it. Her daughter is too independent and stubborn to come running for mommy or daddy.

“What are you contemplating?” Ereshkigal asks her. Is everyone here able to sneak up on her? She nearly fell from her seat.

“Thinking about my daughter,” Siobhan answers.

“Which one? You said daughters yesterday,” the goddess inquires.

“Nina. My eldest,” she sighs. “We had a special bond, we shared everything. She would have loved this library.”

“Tell me about her,” Ereshkigal prompts and sits next to her.

“Nina is a ray of sunshine in the deepest pit of darkness. Just her smile can make everything better. She kept me happy, she looked out for me when I couldn’t look out for her anymore. Selene had a family of her own, but Nina stayed with me,” Siobhan smiles. The memories are good.

“Sounds like she cared for you deeply. You can ask Nakir to bring her here when she dies. If she’s a pure soul, she can bring all of us some joy,” the goddess murmurs.

“She won’t come. I know, she won’t. It’s my punishment, not hers,” she shakes her head.

“Why would you give her a choice? We can spy on her through the screening pool and you send Nakir to fetch her soul when it’s time,” the goddess scoffs. “You mortals have to complicate things too much.”

“Nina won’t die,” Siobhan whispers. “She’s not ageing, she’s immortal. Nina is Nakir’s daughter. And I kept her a secret from him for sixty years. I tried to let him know, but I was selfish. I could have used his feather to summon him at any time, and I kept it til my time ran out and I was on my deathbed.”

“She’s what?” Ereshkigal exclaims. The goddess is angry. There is fire dancing in her dark eyes: “Does he know now?”

“Yes. He met her when he came to claim me. Nakir gave her a feather, but she’s just like him. She won’t use it,” Siobhan nods.

“For this I should make you scrub my floors with a toothbrush!” Ereshkigal glares at her. “I lost all my children. My husband. Everyone I ever cared for. And you kept her from him? Nakir never had anyone.”

“In the short time I knew him, he pushed everyone away. Even me,” she tells the goddess. “He never loved me. I was a toy for one night.”

“Still not a reason to keep his daughter a secret,” Ereshkigal glares at her. “Come with me. I want to see her.”

“Are we going to the human realm?” Siobhan sputters.

“Of course not. You are dead, you can’t go. I don’t want to go,” the goddess smirks. “I have a screening pool that allows me to see everything I want.”

Ereshkigal leads her through the long hallways and down into the underground of the palace. It’s more like a cave structure down here than a cellar. There is a spring of clear water that just comes out of the cave wall. It cascades down like a small waterfall and gathers in a pool. The water shimmers blue in the torch light. The goddess sits on the edge of the pool and dips her fingers into the water. The surface turns into a mirror that reflects everything back in clarity.

“Touch the mirror, think of Nina,” Ereshkigal instructs.

“A memory?” Siobhan asks. She has no idea how these things work.

“No. Concentrate on her. Like you would do a search spell, just without the spell,” the goddess answers. She seems to be in a better mood than before.

Siobhan touches the surface of the water carefully. Nina appears almost instantly. The scene is hilarious to say the least. How did she end up being a babysitter for Flora’s kids? Siobhan smiles at the sight and explains: “Those are my great grandchildren. Selene’s family is large. Both her daughters have four children. I just wonder how they roped Nina into babysitting?”

“She’s good with them, that’s all that matters. And she looks exactly like Nakir, except for the hair. It looks good on her, though. And I see she has the same aversion to colour as we do,” Ereshkigal chuckles.

“May I come here to spy on her from time to time?” Siobhan inquires.

“If you wish. Just don’t dwell on the past. That can draw you in and ruin you,” Ereshkigal warns her.