Her Fire

08 ~ Storm of emotions

The man seems taken aback by her strange question.

“I… don’t think so.” He answers slowly. “Why?”

She sighs, shaking her head. “You just…seem awfully familiar… Like I’ve seen you before…”

David shrugs. “I know I haven’t seen you before. I would have remembered you, in any case.”

Annoyed at her memory, Deirdre clicks her tongue and looks around.

“Where could Flint be? He’s the reason I even left the comfort of my cottage… I was about to have my iced tea.”

David sniffs. “Iced tea? Vile thing. Flint did you a favor, then.”

“What!? I happen to love iced tea!”

David shakes his head. “Americans.” He mutters.

Deirdre rolls her eyes. “There is nothing wrong with iced tea! Have you even tried it?”

“Yes.”

“And?”

“No.”

And they are back on monosyllables.

She sighs, sweeps the place one more time with her eyes, hoping to find Flint and decides to go home when she doesn’t see him.

“Well, this has been nice but… I’m going to go back now, I’m still a little bit tired. Are you staying in the villa for long or are you leaving soon?”

“I’m staying for a while.”

“Alright… then, um…I guess I’ll see you around...” She says as she turns away.

Before reaching the bend, she looks back and sees that David has gone to walk in the middle of the sea of bluebonnets, gently caressing the flowers he passes by.

Deirdre wonders, seeing as Flint is nowhere to be found, why the man even asked her to follow him.

The wind rises, making the bluebonnets bend and bow before him as if worshiping their master and for some unknown reason, the whole scene makes Deirdre very nostalgic.

How very odd.

How… troubling.

She returns home, almost running like a coward, fearful of encountering even stranger, more unwelcome emotions.

***

Half an hour before…

Flint had been hesitant to pursue their mate but David was determined to somehow make a connection with her and it would never happen unless they made contact first.

So shifting into Flint, he dragged his reluctant wolf to the cottage they used to occupy in order to befriend her.

“What are we even going to do when we get there?” Flint had muttered. “Do a little jig for her?”

David rolled his eyes in response to the sarcasm. “Well, people love dogs. Just act all cute and dvmb.” He replied dismissively.

Flint growled. “I refuse to humiliate myself! Not even for our fated mate.”

“Oh, relax! We can just… I don’t know, break the ice by being friendly with her… Maybe… Hey, maybe we can show her the bluebonnet hills. She might like it. I told Matt not to bring her there yesterday so we can personally show it to her.”

When they reached the cottage, Flint almost balked when they saw Deirdre out on the terrace so David had no choice but to take over.

“Oh, hi…” She had said, smiling a little. “Flint, right?”

David gave an awkward bark, trying to tell her to follow, and it thrilled him when she did. He ran faster, barking every now and then to entice her to follow. He shifted back to his human form near the hidden treehouse and immediately got dressed.

“Flint?” She called from around the bend before walking straight onto his chest. “Oh, I’m so sorry, I—” She gasped when their eyes met and David felt as though he’d swallowed his own tongue.

Tongue that suddenly felt like it had doubled in size and dry as sandpaper, stuck in his throat, as his heart pounds erratically in his chest. He feels a little dizzy and nauseous.

Oh no.

Not now.

Panic attack.

David stared at his fated mate, her scent overwhelming and calming him at the same time, and only one thought filled his mind. Mine.

She was saying something. Apologizing for bumping into him and something about Flint.

He nodded when he realized she was waiting for an answer, saying nothing as he struggled to keep himself together and not hyperventilate right in front of her.

That would certainly be quite a haunting first impression, him passing out because of severe anxiety. Or even throwing up at her feet. He'd never live it down.

Really, he’d rather appear aloof or unfriendly.

So, instead of mortifying embarrassment, he focused on keeping his knees from giving up and walked away, resigned to just try again another day.

But he stopped short when he heard her call out for him to wait. There was no denying her wish and he closed his eyes in surrender but didn’t turn around as he waited for his pulse to calm down.

His whole system was being bombarded by mixed signals, wanting to escape because of his instinctive aversion to a stressful situation and the undeniable response of his soul to the call of the mate bond. He had feelings of impending doom but her presence was also like that of a soothing balm that calmed him down before he could be completely overwhelmed. He could feel himself being pulled in every direction and the pounding of his heart was making David feel like he'd pass out in just a few seconds.

He tried to focus on her face and he could see her lips were moving.

She was asking if he'd seen Flint. Swallowing back the bile that suddenly collected in his mouth, he forced out one word.

“No.”

God, that came out rather rudely and she seemed taken aback by the unfriendly response, making David feel guilty when she apologized for disturbing him. She shouldn’t be apologizing! There was nothing wrong with her at all!

Forcing himself to forget about his own discomfort, he muttered, “Come with me.”

“Excuse me?”

“I know where he might go. Follow me if you want.” He walked away again, sounding almost gruff and uncaring, but that was the best he could manage given his own emotional and mental state.

The bluebonnet hill. That ought to deviate her attention and take some of the pressure off him, at least for a little while. He could not give her flowers yet, it was too soon, but he could show her a lovely view that would take her breath away.

She didn’t follow him immediately and he thanked whatever deity was out there when he heard her call Mattia first, inquiring about him, asking if it was safe to go after him.

Beautiful and smart.

He heard her talking to his cousin and he took the opportunity to focus on calming himself.

Matt mind-linked him. “Hey, is it you she’s talking about?”

He took a deep breath. “Yes. We’re near the bluebonnet hill.”

“Do you want me to come and get her?”

David considered that for a few seconds before answering with a firm “No.”

Mattia was quiet for a few beats before saying “Alright.” and closing the mind-link.

After talking to Matt for a little while, she began to follow him again, calling for him to wait for her, sounding quite annoyed that she had to run and he didn’t wait for her before she gasped in wonder at the sight that suddenly appeared behind the curve.

Even for them, who had lived here for years, this particular view never ceased to impress and he fully approved of her reaction.

“Oh, wow…” She whispered, standing right beside him. “It’s so beautiful… What are those flowers?”

“Bluebonnets. From the Lupinus genus.” Thank god for the flowers. Flowers were always a safe topic of conversation and David started to feel more at ease. “You’re just in time to see the last blooms. They will be gone soon, as the temperature is starting to drop.”

She turned to him curiously. “Are you a botanist?”

“No.” He answered, almost curtly, but he cushioned it with a small smile, feeling the anxiety returning as she focused on him again.

The woman studied him quietly before introducing herself. “I’m Deirdre.”

“I know.” Damn. Wrong answer. He should have just nodded and told her his name and be done with it.

And in fact, she was instantly suspicious and began asking more questions that David wanted to smack himself.

Their conversation went on, stilted and awkward, peppered with bouts of silence here and there as he struggled to stay where he was, when every single cell of his body wanted him to run as far away as possible.

“Are you always this… standoffish?” She asked, her tone resigned and even slightly irked. “Maybe I should just go?”

David felt himself go cold, the feeling of nausea returning in full swing. “You may go if you wish, of course.” He said but instantly regretted it as he felt a huge wave of sadness at the thought of her leaving. “Or… you can stay. And just enjoy the peace and quiet with me.” He murmured the last words more to himself than to her, like some sort of intimate prayer.

He didn’t think she’d heard him at all, and yet, apparently, she did.

Deirdre sighed… and stayed and they even had a funny exchange about iced tea, of all things!

As an English gentleman, he is appalled at the very idea of iced tea, which, in his opinion, is meant to go down the drain. Tea should be piping hot, in a lovely porcelain cup (hell, even a chipped mug would do), with milk and just the right amount of sugar. Why would anyone in their right mind want to ruin it by putting ice in it!? He’d tried iced tea once and it tasted a bit like… s**t coke. Flat and full of sugar.

~~~

Present…

“Well, this has been nice but… I think I'm going back to the cottage now, I’m still a little bit tired. Are you staying in the villa for long or are you leaving soon?”

“I’m staying for a while.” David feels both relief that his discomfort is about to end and sadness that she is leaving, but at least she doesn’t seem annoyed with him anymore.

“Alright… then, um…I guess I’ll see you around...” She says as she turns to leave.

He nods to himself and walks towards the bluebonnets, eager to regain his balance amidst the beautiful blossoms that never asks questions, never judges him and never makes him feel like a complete and utter disaster.

The wind rises, making the bluebonnets bend and sway as if dancing and trying to cheer him up.

He smiles sadly to himself.

The thing that would have consoled him before… no longer does.

Because his fated mate is here and now she’s all that matters to him. Everything has shifted and there is nothing to do but try to make it work with her or seriously consider the rejection.

The first option seems physically painful, just imagining the struggles of trying to win her over, of courting and dating again… of persuading her to give him a chance…

He’s exhausted just thinking about it.

But the second option… will probably break his soul.

David sighs. He might as well just… give up.

He looks up from down the hill and watches as Deirdre runs eagerly towards the cottage as if all the hounds of hell were behind her, and he feels like an absolute loser.

Scared away another one.

“You did alright.” Flint whispers. “Considering.”

He sighs. Yes. Considering that it’s him, that actually didn’t go so badly. It could have gone much worse.

“Hey, man, what happened?!” Mattia asks via mind link all of a sudden, his tone worried.

David frowns in confusion. “Nothing, she went back to the cottage. Maybe I bored the hell out of her…” he says miserably.

“Well, I don’t understand… why does she want to leave, then?”

“WHAT!?”