Toxic

Chapter 4.

My first day of school arrived under many expectations. I think the Kramers were as anxious as I was about it, so anxious that Mrs. Kramer made a delicious breakfast, and Mr. Kramer offered to drive me to school in his car even though I was planning to take the bus. Before I left, Mrs. Kramer gave me lots of advice and asked me to call her if anything happened, while Mr. Kramer advised me not to get so close to the boys. Seeing them so concerned about me made me smile.

For my first day of school, I tried to wear something nice but also casual, I didn't want others to think I was wearing an outfit for something fancy, just that I was neatly going to school. So I wore a nice summer dress that we bought last week with Mrs. Kramer, it had cute flower prints on it and was one of the first things I bought for my outfit keeper. Over the dress I put on a light, open sweater to cover my arms, also wearing some new sneakers and the same color as the sweater, and I finished my new look by combing my long blonde hair into a ponytail. So when we arrived at the school, grabbing my new black leather backpack, I got out of Mr. Kramer's car to leave.

—Don't forget to call us if anything happens, anything at all. And come home soon to tell you everything, okay? —Mr. Kramer asks me, as he watches me get off.

—I will, thank you very much —I answer happily, looking at him from outside the car before closing the door.

—Have fun —she asks as a farewell, as I finally close the door.

Taking a big sigh, trying to push the nervousness away from me again and again, I started walking out of the school parking lot to go inside the main building, following the other guys who were already there. I would like to say that I stood out from everyone else in the school, but to tell the truth, I didn't, my outfit wasn't weird at all, I even ran into a girl who was wearing my same dress but with a different print; so even though in a way I dreamed of "glowing" when I got to school, I passed as just another girl in the middle of many strangers.

As I entered the main school building, I couldn't help but feel a little dizzy. Everyone was very noisy and running from one side to the other, also pushing others and not apologizing, plus for the first time in my life I was surrounded by so many men; I think Mr. Kramer was very right with his warnings. The first thing I did when I arrived was to go directly to the information area of the school, which I did not take long to find, since it was practically at the entrance. Here I was to be given documents such as my new locker information and a map of the school, as well as my class schedule and some textbooks. Mrs. Kramer told me exactly what to say, and although she wanted to accompany me here the first day because she was afraid I would get lost, I refused, I was not in preschool for my parents to take me by the hand to my classroom.

After receiving many directions from the lady who took care of me in information, trying to memorize everything, I finally took my textbooks, and helping myself with the school map I ventured to find my locker. The school map is... Weird. Maybe because I've never read a map before, or because this place is just huge, I couldn't find where the lockers were on the first try. Fortunately, I ran into a teacher, whom I was able to ask and she told me how to get there.

Going to what according to the map was the "north" part of the institute, I finally found the hallways where my locker was and relieved I was finally able to leave my textbooks. I must admit that I love my locker, it looks exactly like in the movies, and although I know I shouldn't get excited about things like that, I already have plans for things to put in this little space at school to make it nicer. Leaving the texts I wouldn't be using inside the locker, and taking with me only the history book for my first class of the day, I ventured back to the school map to find my classroom.

Getting lost again after passing a few hallways, I was surprised to see Andy, who passed in front of me. So excited I couldn't help but say hello to her:

—Andy! —I said out loud, waving at her from a distance in the hallway she was walking down.

At first, when I saw her, I couldn't help but feel relieved, thinking that I would have my savior who would at least show me how I could get to my classroom. However, Andy turned around in the middle of the hallway, looking at me for a second, and then turned around again to continue on his way, without even saying a word to me. Thus I was left in the middle of nowhere, very stunned, not understanding why Andy had ignored me. Trying to reason positively, I told myself that Andy hadn't ignored me, that maybe she was just in a hurry or that she didn't see me. Of course, those were just excuses.

After walking the halls for several minutes, I had to turn to another student for directions. This guy is very brusque as if he was annoyed to help me, told me which way to go, without even allowing me to thank him before disappearing down the crowded corridors. Why is everyone so nasty here? Can't they be even a little nicer?

After these terrible first encounters, my excitement couldn't help but dwindle to almost an absolute zero. Passing amid jostling boys who were so boisterous, I could only think of how much I missed the classes on a Tuesday at the orphanage, where we would start with math class with Sister Alma and then see Sister Meredith for etiquette classes...

With those thoughts, even though everything would calm down and get better, in truth everything was about to get worse.

When I finally made it to my classroom following the directions of that boy who "kindly" helped me, I found Andy inside. That girl with curly black hair and a kind smile now looked like someone completely different from when I first met her. Sitting in a circle with other boys and girls, upon seeing me enter the classroom, she quickly burst into laughter with them. And although they didn't mention my name in any instant, I knew right away that they were laughing at me.

Feeling very uncomfortable and sad, I hurried to one of the few empty seats left in the class, which were those near the front. And although I didn't turn around for a single moment to look at Andy and his group of retarded friends, I could hear the whole class laughing and whispering about me. So without being able to pay attention, even though I wanted to know about the class, I couldn't help but think over and over about their constant teasing, Is there something wrong with my outfit? Or do I have something on my face? With such confusing thoughts swirling around in my head, I couldn't help but think that there was something wrong with me, and losing all the confidence I had left, I let my hair out of the high ponytail I made for myself and closed my sweater to try to cover up a little.

When history class was over, I practically ran out of the room to go to my next class, I didn't want to see Andy let alone hear any more laughter. So to no longer have those idiots staring at my back the whole time, this time I sat in the back of the room, mistakenly thinking that this would solve the issue. And even though in my next class I was behind Andy and his friends, they would turn around in their seats to look at me and laugh at me; something that was much worse, as I could now see their faces when they made fun of me.

I didn't want this to affect me, I didn't, but I still couldn't help but go cry in the bathroom instead of going to the cafeteria for lunch. I felt so confused and hurt, not understanding why they were laughing and whispering about me, had I done something wrong? Did I upset Andy? Looking at my phone, I thought about calling Mrs. Kramer, wanting to go home. But I refused to do so, as I didn't want to cause my new parents any worries so soon...

The next two classes after lunch were torture, for even though Andy was no longer there, some of his friends were, so they kept whispering and laughing at me, when will they get tired of doing that? Will they leave me alone at some point? I feel so hurt and so sad that I don't pay attention to anything, not the classes or other people, mentally praying that it would all be over so I could go home.

When it was finally 4 pm and I could leave, I stayed in the classroom for a while longer, letting those idiots leave early, because I didn't want to hear their laughter when I passed by them. Amid all my sadness, using the map they gave me, I managed to barely make it to my locker, where I reluctantly left some books and took others to do my homework. However, I was too dazed and still didn't understand the school maps, so I couldn't help but get lost again as I tried to leave. I didn't even know how I would get home, worried about missing the bus, but I didn't want to stop to ask for directions and run into unpleasant people again, so I kept trying by my own means to find my way out, even though I was getting more and more lost, while the hallways got much emptier with each passing second.

It was in this way that I heard the melody of the piano in the distance.

It was not just any song, I knew its melody, I remembered it. However, I didn't quite know from where, I wasn't sure about it, even though I tried to make a great effort in my memory, I couldn't remember when I heard that song before. It seemed that its notes were embedded in a part of my memory, one that I could not access, that for me was blocked.

Being able to think only of that song, that mesmerizing melody, I walked in the direction of the sound, losing myself among the corridors of the school. Arriving at the subfloor, a place which did not even appear on the map I was given upon entering, I continued walking through its cold and dark corridors to a half-open door, which left its entrance to a large auditorium. Passing through the luxurious empty seats, entering what seemed to be a luxurious auditorium in the school, I advanced to the middle of the hall, where I could finally know the origin of that melody.

On the stage, with the only lights in the place illuminating it, was a boy in front of a black grand piano, playing in a loop that song that attracted me so much.

Without even looking at me, but knowing of my presence, that stranger said: —What are you doing here?

His voice sounded like an ice tempane, so cold, so angry. Did I do something to upset him? Pressing the book I was holding in my hands, I didn't know what to answer, feeling extremely shy with him. However, that boy wasted no time, and without stopping touching for a single second, he turned in my direction for the first time, looking at me with his eyes as blue and cold as the sea, to tell me:

—Get out.

And with just that sentence, without needing any more words, my heart began to beat desperately.