Lush Love

Doubt It

Elise:

I refused to go home tonight. I went straight for my apartment. My brothers wanted to stay but decided that they should probably not piss dad off more than he's going to be when he finds out that I'm not going to be staying in the main house or on Walton property, at all. I want to show him that I will cooperate with his decisions but ultimately, I have options of my own. He'll never hold my fate over my head again. Apparently, Pierce Kingsley will.

Okay, think. What happened that night? I cut my hair, Zach convinced me to go out. Lies, I did that myself. Pierce Kingsley and I exchanged a few words. It's clear that we both hate our dads but our respect for them is mutual. I remember sitting down and us talking about school. He had graduated from Princeton last year. His school doesn't believe in Fraternities. Not the way my school does but he's grown fond of Zach.

We were laughing and talking about the differences in our upbringings and the similarities by the time we got to the club. What happened after that? I shut my eyes and sat down on the staircase in my apartment. What the hell is wrong with me? I've never let anything go anywhere with anyone. I'm supposed to be the uptight responsible one. I don't make mistakes. I can't afford to. Not as a woman in this industry. This is going to look so bad for me in the future.

"Mr. Kingsley, is it true that you're going to be taking over for your father in the spring? Why the sudden urgency? Are you getting married?" someone asked him. "Is that Elise Walton?" 

"Welcome back to reality, Ms. Walton," he smirked as we made our way to his car. 

"That is going to be funny tomorrow on Twitter," Rissa laughed when we were finally inside of the car. 

"Not to us," Pierce sighed heavily. 

"Shots," Zack shouted. Rissa handed me a cup again. 

"I think I'm done," I rejected the drink.

"b***h, this is the last time we're going to be able to get completely s**t-faced without the scrutiny of your parent's disapproval. Let's get ugly one more time. I am begging you. Beggin! Beggin, you!" she sang. 

What the hell was I thinking when I took the bottle from her and took a massive drink from it. I went as far as offering the bottle to Pierce who laughed and did the same exact thing. Who was that? What was she trying to prove? Oh, god. Let these fluorescents fall on my head and kill me to death right now.

"Ms. Walton, we weren't expecting you for a couple of days," I abruptly stood up when Florencia, head of my home staff walked in through the elevator doors. "I came as quickly as I could when the alarm went off," 

"I forgot about the silent alarm we set up. I am so sorry, Flor. I woke you up didn't I?" I apologized. 

"I was up watching Reyna Del Sur," she waved me off. She removed her coat. "How about some tea? You look a little stressed," 

"I am a little stressed," I nodded. "I can make us some," 

"What? No, I would never allow that," she waved me off. 

"I've been doing it for a while now," I reassured her as I went over to the kitchen. 

"Then, allow me to show where everything is," she rushed past me. Flor pulled out everything I needed while pointing out where everything goes. I've got the gist of it. "I was so very mad at your papa when he decided to cut you off," 

"It's fine. It was rough at first but I adapted quickly," I waved it off. 

"Now look at you," she came over to me. "As soon as Master Mac told me you were looking for a place in the city, I had to come. You are so grown," her eyes began to water. I instantly stepped forward and wrapped my arms around her. "Mi Nina. You are beautiful. You've become a magnificent young lady," 

"Thank you, Flor," I tightened my hold on her as she began to cry. 

"Your Mamacita would be so proud of you," 

"Don't make me cry. I feel like hell already,"

Flor has been working for my family since my mom was pregnant with me and Mac. They were about the same age when she started. She's looked over me my entire life. She's basically my second mother. She has her own cleaning company as well as a very prestigious line of cleaning supplies. My mom started her off small before Juliette was born and her business skyrocketed. She runs our staff. She's here because she wants to. I know my father has asked her to retire a few times and she's refused to. 

I began to make our tea when the water was finally ready. I poured two teacups and sweetened them with honey. She watched me curiously as I set one cup in front of her. She skeptically took a sip and looked up at me impressed. I feel a little insulted. I did learn from her. Although, she never actually let me touch anything. I always watched diligently. I didn't realize how much I missed her until now. I had been so caught up in trying to prove my dad wrong that I missed the little things. I didn't realize my departure had affected others as well.

"Talk to me, Bonita," she placed her hand over mine. 

"I know about dad's fiance," I shrugged. 

"Let me tell you something. I know you're not going to want to hear it but here it is. Your father has been alone for a very long time. I know what you did to Seniora. Howard. I rather enjoyed watching you take after your mother. However, something has changed between the two of them. Whatever manner all of this began, I'd like you to take a moment and think about how it is you're going to move forward from hereon. 

"Your papa is a great man. I know you feel angry about what he did to you all those years ago, but you have to understand that he did it to make you the best version of yourself. Look at you. You've come such a long way. You've started a company and were successful with it where your father never was. You've helped so many achieve their goals. You take care of a lot of people. 

"He's ready to step down. I've heard him talk about it. When you made your debut he was there watching you with a smile on his face. I know you're skeptical. I was too. The moment she walked into that house. I've been watching and my advice is for you to do the same before you act rashly," 

"What am I supposed to think? This woman tried to blackmail me and I destroyed her. Now she's here cozying up to my dad? I'm a woman myself and I can easily say this is an act of war," 

"You sound just like Eliza," she chuckled. "Your room has been prepared. Your things are in the order you like them. I am surprised that you didn't send over more. I also noticed you got rid of a lot of things you took with you,"

"I got rid of everything. Except for mom's jewelry box," I admitted. 

"Okay," she sighed. "Anything else you wish to tell me?" 

"Not yet," I shrugged. 

"Off to bed then. It's late. I'll be back in the morning," she promised. She washed the cups and excused herself. 

This place is beautiful. When I chose it, I knew I was going to be alone here. It's too small for my brothers or my sister to want to stay with me but it's big enough for all of us to stay the night once in a while. There are two guest bedrooms down here hidden behind the spiral staircase. Both of them have their own bathroom. When walking in, the first thing that comes into view is the living room. I don't know who furnished the place. The silver-on blue set has a masculine feel so my bet is on Mac. At the far end of the living room is a massive window overlooking the city. Which is the only reason this place costs so much. The view. 

New York is vast, restless. I remember when I was a little girl, my mom would hold onto my hand tightly as we walked through any street. I remember the massive crowds and the street vendors she never let me eat from. She'd be disappointed to know that I plan on eating anything and everything they have to offer. I love food and I want to try as much of it as I can.

In my time away, I understood what my father was trying to teach me when he cut me off. It's not that I didn't deserve it. I was spoiled and very undeserving of what I was taking from him. I don't know when it happened but I did forgive him a long time ago. I found myself. Somewhere along the line, I stopped being the obedient Walton heiress and became Elise. 

Looking out the window here takes me back to the other night. It was the way he was looking at me. There was a mutual sadness in his eyes. He was dreading coming home for more than one reason. He's expected to give his sister away to someone she barely knows. A business arrangement. He's also engaged. It wouldn't be easier if it were anyone else but his fiance is a close friend of mine. We know things about one another that we'd hate to come out in the open. Samantha Kenedy and I stood side by side as sisters throughout our years in college. I should be the one to tell her.

I know Hailey Kingsley. I've known her since we were kids. The two of us went to the same schools. We've been at each other's throats since we were little. After all this time, I can easily say that I care about her in a touch my things and I'll stab you right through your hand kind of way and she returns the same animosity. I wonder how she's taking this. She's a helpless romantic. I know that because Xion dated her. She was a complete cheeseball in our adolescence.

"You're not what I expected you to be, Ellie,"

He had taken his blazer off. His tailored button-up really outlined his arms perfectly. His vest was incredibly sexy behind the haze of what I was drinking. Pierce Kingsley is a very handsome man. The way he said my name sent chills down my back. I kissed him. I crossed a line I never had before. I hate getting hit on. There were a couple of times when I thought about it. Yale had a few guys who were smart enough and handsome enough for my liking but they were always missing something. Something that at that moment, Pierce Kingsley had. Without knowing, I betrayed Sam.

I laughed thinking about his wild suggestion. We had been having so much fun and he just blurted it out. 

"Marry me," he demanded with confidence, and I being the weirdo that I am, I laughed. In a flirty way. 

"Right now?" 

"I don't care when. Just do it," he shrugged. "I know a place," 

"So, right now?" I laughed. 

"Yes, let's go," he took my hand and we walked there. 

Him, without his coat and me in my stilettos. It didn't matter and it was a wonder how no one saw us walking around in the middle of the night like that. All in all, it's a great story. It's funny and dumb at the same time. One day, I hope to sit with my teenage daughter and tell he about that. Right now, I am seriously hoping our dads don't kill us when it's over. 

When I came down in the morning, my dad is sitting on the couch reading the newspaper. I sighed going over to the kitchen to see Flor making breakfast. Neither of us said a word as she handed me two coffee mugs. I began to prepare it the way he likes it and then took it over to him. I set the mug down and sat across from him. It took him a few minutes to finally fold the paper back up and set it down. He picked up the mug and took a sip. No one reads the paper anymore, old man. There's an app for that.

"Macintyre informed me about his slip," he cleared his throat. He set the mug down and made eye contact. "I know you and Gen have a previous squabble and I would like to ask you to-" 

"This has nothing to do with you. Should any of our actions affect you directly, I'll apologize if I see fit. You're about to ask me to take your relationship with her into consideration of your feelings. I'd like for you to do the same tonight," 

"I am well aware of your anger towards me, Elise. I also know you understand why I did what I did. You wouldn't be who you are had I continued to pay for your actions. You are one of the richest self-made women of your generation. There's not a single trader in America who doesn't want to sign on with your transport. You accomplished something that I couldn't at your age. You were better off for it," 

"You weren't there," I shrugged when he stopped talking. "I'm not mad because you took your money away. I'm not mad because I was thrown out the way I was. It took me forty-eight minutes to get here by helicopter. Not once did you visit me. Not once did you call. In fact, you never took my calls. I never called to ask you for a single thing. I just missed you. 

"As partners for the next five years, I will be treating you as such. Don't ever show up in my apartment unannounced again. If you want to get in touch with me, call one of my assistants. Robin or Sal will gladly tell you when I am available. Now, if you will excuse me. I have a meeting with Mr. Harlem," 

"Elise," he stopped me from walking away. I paused and turned back to look at him. 

"Yes?" 

"You're right. I could have been there for you," he nodded. "I wanted to be," 

"Then why weren't you?" 

"Because I realized that you didn't need me. You never did," he stood up and buttoned his suit. I went over to him and fixed his tie. I smoothed his coat over and looked him in the eyes. 

"Turns out you never needed me either. I'd like for things to stay that way. This is exactly how I pictured you greeting me when I came home. A reprimand,"  

"Will you be present tonight?" he ignored me. I should be used to it by now. Hiding my disappointment has gotten easier since the first time he did it.

"I will be. Thank you for overshadowing my return with your bullshit engagement," I grabbed my coat and my wallet as I made my way out. 

It feels like hell to talk to him that way but I can't look the other way anymore. I can't pretend that none of his actions hurt me. I'm not going to hide who I am for his sake anymore. I don't know if I will ever be okay with "Gen" being at his arm everywhere we go. I do know that I have to figure out where it is we're going to stand. Is she going to continue where we left off now that she can or will she back off and be the noble Mrs. Walton? What happens next is really up to her now.

He should have in the very least greeted me first. It shows exactly where he stands. With her. He came here to defend her. When did he become the hero in his story? When did other people become more than accessories to him? Has he been trying to help either of his children? Does he care that Mac goes out of his way to please him and give him the time off so he can spend it away from the office? Does he know I've had Julie in rehab twice? Does he care that she falls apart and relapses because she honestly believes she's dead inside? Does he even know that Elliot is a master of his trade? Does he know I chose transportation because that's what he's always wanted? I seriously doubt it. No, this mess has nothing to do with her. It's about him. This is all on him.