The Luna

20

A shower, especially this shower, is exactly what I needed to try and relax. A waterfall shower head surrounded by gorgeous teal tiles and a glass door. It's simple and luxurious, like being a spa. Even the bottles of shampoo and conditioner that are in here smell amazing and make it even more relaxing. I could probably stay in this shower for hours, maybe even days if the hot water holds, but I don't want to be rude.

Emily and Harper got some clothes for me to change into - simple jeans and a baby blue shirt. It has a palm tree on the front advertising some hotel in California, but it's better than a white dress. I push the white fabric into a small trash can, glad I won't have to see that anymore. I stared at the red cloak, wondering if I should keep it off, but ultimately decided that I should keep it on, at least for now.

Emily and Harper are lounging in the bedroom, talking in hushed whispers that stop the minute I open the bathroom door.

"Hey, how was the shower?" Harper asked, standing from where she was sitting on the bed. The dark blue comforter is crinkled from the weight, but otherwise perfectly made. A flat-screen TV is hung on the wall across from the bed, surrounded by simple framed paintings of wolves and sunflowers.

"Amazing, thank you. You've decorated beautifully," I say, finger combing my hair to try and avoid large knots from forming.

"You should have seen the place before I moved in with Jaxon," Harper smiles, moving past me back into the bathroom, returning with a comb that she offers me as well as a pack of hair ties, "I swear, he only knew how to work with one color, black,"

Emily snorts out a laugh, earning her a small glare from Harper. I don't sense any animosity in the action, but it does make me question the relationships. Emily is Jaxon's cousin and Harper was sitting on his lap, which is more than what family members would do.

"So you and Jaxon are..." I trailed off, running the comb through my hair. Harper blushes, her cheeks tinting the slightest pink as she looks at her feet.

"They're together, and yes they're one of those couples," Emily answers, holding her hand out for the comb, "I can french braid it for you if you'd like?"

I've never really been one to let someone play with or style my hair, but I've always loved it when my hair is in braids. I hand her the comb, once I've made sure to get most of the knots out, holding the hair ties until she needs them.

"What do you mean those couples?" Harper snaps, crossing her arms over her chest before looking at me, "She's just jealous that -"

"Jealous?!" I wince when Emily pulls a little too rough on my hair as she twists and weaves it into its braid, "I'm not jealous, I'm sick of watching the two of you make goo-goo eyes at each other from across the room. And don't even get me started when you're standing next to each other," She fake gags as she reaches for the hair tie in my hand.

"Word of advice, Mia, make sure their hands are always within sight when you're arou-"

"That was one time, Emily, and you should have knocked!" Harper gasps in horror, pointing an accusing finger in our direction.

I can't help but laugh at the two of them. Their relationship seems so easy, so flawless that I'm a little jealous if I'm being honest. I considered myself friends with Justice and the other wait staff, but I can't remember such easy banter between us.

We talked about our day and compared customers, sure, but at the end of the day I think it was work that kept us as friends. I can't say that we would joke and tease like Harper and Emily are doing. Then again, I guess these two can be considered family. I mean Jaxon is in a relationship with Harper, and he's also Emily's cousin.

They join along in my laughter before sharing a look with each other.

"We really should be getting back to the guys," Emily mumbles, watching my face carefully. What she's looking for though, I don't know.

"But can we, um, ask you something first?" Harper adds before quickly continuing, "I mean if you don't want to answer or anything don't feel obligated to. It's just curiosity mostly."

"OK," I folded my arms over my chest as if to shield myself from whatever is about to be asked. As if my arms alone can protect any vulnerability that whatever question they have might cause.

"It's just that, well, we were wondering about how you got involved with the Lotus pack, to begin with?" I could tell that Emily was hesitant with her question as they both watched me carefully.

Images of my first encounter with Caspian in the woods flood my mind. So many red flags are clearly on display when I look back, starting with him being n***d in the woods. His charming smile, even in my memory, is dazzling. Against every instinct of self-preservation, I was caught like a fly in the spider's web.

"I was in the woods, behind where I was living. He said he was looking for something and found me. That I was important." I don't know how much information to give, but the gritty details are embarrassing to me.

Will I ever not have to be reminded of how stupid I was? Or will I be forever branded, forced to tell time and time again how naive I was?

They both nod sympathetically - heads tilted to the side as if I were some abandoned puppy that was found on the side of the road in need of a home. I can't look at them as shame colors my features and my gaze drops to the floor.

"It's not your fault," my head snaps to Emily as the words leave her mouth, "You didn't know any better, and truthfully, that pack probably used that against you,"

For an instant, I'm floored taking in her words. Whether she actually believes it or whether I believe it, it's something I needed to hear.

I have been coming to terms with the fact that the moment Caspian laid eyes on me, there was only one path to walk. It doesn't make it easier to accept. The what-ifs will always be on my mind, always plaguing me.

I don't respond, even if I could think of something to say, I doubt it would get past the lump forming in my throat. I try to swallow past it, but it's not working. A choking sound leaves my lips and I quickly turn away so that Harper and Emily can't see.

I can't show weakness in front of the wolves. I have to be strong and pull myself together.

"Why don't we go check on the guys," Harper suggested after another moment of silence, "see what's been decided," She doesn't wait for any response as she moves past me with a small smile as she passed.

The walk back to the office seems shorter somehow. Maybe that's just because a small part of me is dreading what awaits us. I take a deep breath to steady my nerves as Emily knocks gently, not waiting for a response before opening the door. As soon as we enter, they all turn to look at us, Jaxon holds his hand out, and like a magnet, Harper reaches back.

"Mia," Malachi pulls my attention away, his hand gently grabbing my arm and pulling me to the side of the room, "Jaxon agreed to hide you here," he says simply, and my head turns to look at the Alpha, his arm around Harper's waist holding her close as they all stand in a small circle talking to themselves. "But I can't stay," I practically give myself whiplash with how quickly my head snapped back to face him.

My eyes searched his face, trying to gauge the urgency. I know Favian had told him there was a lot to do, but I had thought, maybe even hoped, that if I were allowed to stay - he would stay long enough to help me get settled at least.

"But," the word dies on my lips as I try to think of what to say without sounding pathetic.

You can't leave me yet.

You saved me - how can I feel safe without you?

"But they'll protect you. Besides, I have a detour to make to check on your friends in Crest Falls, remember," he smiles, but it doesn't reach his eyes. If he is trying to comfort me, it isn't working.

I do remember, more than I have let on. I had hidden my worry about Justice and the diner behind the idle chit-chat he and I created on the drive. It would have served no purpose other than to drive him and me insane, especially when there was nothing to be done at that point.

My eyes glance at the other wolves, still huddled together, but they're not talking anymore. Instead, it seems like they are trying to give Malachi and me some privacy to say goodbye without an audience.

I've never been good at goodbyes. That stands truer now than I think it ever did. My hands move to untie the ribbon on the cloak, pulling it from my shoulders and handing it to Malachi with a watery smile. I can feel a tear sliding down my cheek despite my best efforts to stop it.

Malachi's hands cover mine, but he doesn't take the cloak. Instead, he pushes it gently back towards me.

"Keep it. In case you need to hide until I can get back here," he lets go of my hands, pulling me in for a hug, "it'll be okay, Little Red,"

I might never be completely safe again, but Malachi saved me. With him, I was beginning to feel at least a little protected. Like I had someone on my side and now, I feel like I'm alone and vulnerable against the wolves again.

"Thank you," I hugged him a little closer to me, taking in the last little bit of safety I'd found before slowly pulling myself away, "For everything,"

"Em, why don't you take Mia and help her get settled," Jaxon pulls the room's attention easily, "Austin, I need you to talk to the patrol leaders. They need to be on the lookout for anything out of the ordinary. Axe, spread around that there is a mandatory pack meeting tonight at nine,"

They all nod to their Alpha, all setting out to the tasks that they've been given. I watched Austin and Axe leave without so much as a glance in my direction.

"There's a room down the hall from me that's open," Emily sidled up next to me as my hands fiddled with the cloak, "Whenever you're ready,"

I take a deep breath, steadying myself for goodbye. I turn back to face Malachi, my back straight and head held high but he's not behind me anymore. My eyebrows scrunch together and I turn in a circle looking to see if he moved to talk to his cousin.

He's gone. Guess he isn't great at goodbyes either.

"Mia," Jaxon's voice is soft as I give him an exhausted look over my shoulder. Today feels like it has been years long and I kind of just want more time alone to process everything. The shower was good, but not nearly long enough.

"Welcome to the pack."