Shameless (1*+) (Book 1)

Chapter 4: Shower Scenes and Unknown feelings

Those eyes, those gorgeous blue eyes glimmering with an unreadable emotion stared back at Bianca as he said those four words- he really did look sorry, but Bianca just wasn't about to let him off the well sharpened hook that easily, not when he'd return to the scrawny arms of Stephanie the minute she forgave him.

Not wasting another second, Bianca ignored his thoughtless apology and pulled the covers over her head, pretending to get back to sleep. Her father only sighed loudly before a hand tugged at the comforter-this was the most effort he'd ever made to get back on good terms with her, yet still, she wasn't even the slightest happy, as his momentary remorse couldn't erase all those years he'd hurt her.

"Leave me alone. " Bianca gnarled rudely from under the covers, not even bothering to lift her head and ensure he did so.

A few seconds of silence rolled by before she felt the bed slightly bounce back as her father stood up, what soon followed was the click of her door and it's hinges squeaking as it went shut. Immediately she peered out of the blankets and instinctively rolled her eyes,her breathing finally stabilizing. The weird knots still settled in her stomach but she refused to give them any thought as she closed her eyes and went back to sleep.

After what only seemed like a few minutes of sleep, the screeching blare of the alarm filled the room, rudely waking her. With a loud groan, Bianca flung her arm over to her nightstand and switched it off. Still very much drowsy, she languidly lifted herself up and leaned against the headboard. Her fingers lazily rubbed her eyes, which only made her more sleepy- but the reality couldn't be denied; she had to get ready for school.

Thanks goodness it's Friday, b***h gotta get some rest.

After a fit of yawns and some stretching, Bianca was finally able to convince her flaccid muscles to carry her out of the comfortable bed that was so eagerly calling for her. She then prepared for her shower, but not before straightening out the pieces of her school uniform on the bed; a white cotton button up with dark blue buttons, a navy blue tie, a pleated skirt with a mix of dark green and blue scotches, a dark blue blazer and some white knee-length socks with blue rims which were optional. Adjusting the slightly loose straps of her silk nightdress, Bianca yawned as she stepped out of the room and waddled down the narrow hallway.

Passing by her father's room, she made sure to take a quick peek inside, knowing very well her interest in doing so ; She'd assumed wrongly- inside laid nothing that could indicate that Stephanie had stayed the night.

Good! A small smile played on her lips as mild relief washed over her. She was definitely overjoyed that she won't have to see her father's latest bimbo's ugly, sour face so early in the morning- seeing her repulsive face alone would not only have her feeling more than squeamish, but would also have been enough to spoil her entire Friday.

Fucking b***h!

Filthy bloody skandle! Her temperature rose up at the mere recall of Stephanie's smug little grin when she walked in the living room last night, but, she choose to dump those enraging thoughts to the very last corner of her mind- Stephanie had already managed to ruin one day for her, she just wasn't about to let her unconsciously ruin another.

With the bathroom only a few feet away, Bianca dragged her feet, not even the slightest anticipating anything out of the ordinary happening- but then, the unimaginable happened. She found herself cursing under her breath. Her father walked out of his bathroom- which was adjacent to hers, only separated by a wall in the middle, otherwise the two doors would be nearly facing each other. In all her eighteen years of life living in the same house with the man, she'd never stumbled upon him fresh from the shower- the sight refused to be ignored. As much as she tried, Bianca simply couldn't resist, her eager eyes fell on him and slowly took in every delicious detail.

There he stood- with only a black towel hanging low from his waist covering his naked body, droplets of water leaked from his wet, disheveled hair and ran down his chiseled chest which was dusted with small, curly hairs which trailed all the way down the valley between his prominent abs- All those years of military training, professional boxing and a daily hardcore routine at the gym had clearly done his body some rightfully deserved justice. In one word he looked....Bianca couldn't control herself, she'd lost all ability to control her appreciative eyes and she knew that she'd been staring long enough to be noticed.

Slowly her eyes met his inexpressive ones- he'd seen her checking him out, which was above many levels of embarrassing, yet her body continued to betray her, when her tongue gained a mind of its own and darted out of her mouth before it subtly swept over her bottom lip.

How cliche could things get?!!

Get a grip Bianca! You're acting like that w***e Stacy. What's going on with you nowadays??!! She mentally scolded herself- not the tiniest appreciating the tango taking place in her stomach.

"Good morning sweetheart, how'd you sleep?" Her father spoke up, his deep, husky voice hitting her ears at a close distance. She'd been so trapped in her bedazzlement that she failed to notice him advancing closer.

Get a f*****g grip!

Frowning deeply at her actions , Bianca rolled her eyes to mask her immense embarrassment with anger, ignored him and attempted to walk past him- attempted. She had not even covered the distance of three inches before her father's large, moist hand had gripped at her wrist and just as quickly hauled her closer to him- so close that their bodies were almost touching. Bianca's heart immediately went into a frenzy and her breathing became more and more shallow- she could barely maintain eye contact.

"How long are you going to continue to ignore me?" He asked. Bianca simply said nothing, trying her best to keep a nonchalant face.

"Look i know i messed up and i am sorry. I shouldn't have missed a meeting that was so important to you and i apologize for that but- I've explained myself..we can't continue to live like this, all this bitterness is not healthy. We should at least make peace seeing we live in one house, that would just ease a lot of unnecessary stress for the both of us." Her father spoke softly, his intense blue eyes still cutting into hers.

When she only gulped and said nothing, he released her wrist and laid his hand on her bare shoulder, the mere touch sent chilly tingles throughout her body.

what the f**k is wrong with you Bianca?!! Say something you i***t!

Only her anger could save her from being a pathetic wimp. She reminded herself of all the emotions she'd been subjected to the previous day- he'd betrayed her, he'd chosen some stranger over her, he'd downgraded her to nothing. Of course he'd say he's sorry, he'd done so so many times before, only to repeat the same mistake over and over again!

Bianca's anger was definitely piqued, but this time, it was more directed to herself- for still feeling so vulnerable next to him, he was just a man and men never could intimidate her nor remote her feelings- why was he different??

"I'll believe you're truly sorry once you mean it. I have to prepare myself for school, i wouldn't want to be late because of such a stupid conversation. " with that, she dashed to her bathroom, not sparing him another glance.

Quickly she slid off her nightdress and stepped into the shower. The warm water cascaded down her back and relaxed her tense body, delicately pacifying her heart into normal beating, though no ease could be given to her mind.

How she wondered and wondered and wondered what was wrong with her and yet at the same time denied every logical answer her mind came up with.

She just had to get a grip that's all, no man could have such a hard, controlling hold on her- especially not her father, it just wasn't permitted.

She closed her eyes as her mind slowly processed what had just occurred, how she reacted, why she reacted that way- this shower wasn't going to be a peaceful one, not by any means. Deep in her consuming thoughts, Bianca heard the faint sound of her door opening and closing which she chose not to register- then footsteps padded the ceramic floors, finally alarming her.

Her eyes opened and almost immediately bulged out when she saw her father stepping inside the spacy cubicle. She rarely closed the transparent glass door of the shower during summer, she never felt the need to since she always made sure to lock the bathroom door. Thus he'd stepped right in with utmost ease and had her cornered.

"W-w-what are you doing in here?" She found herself stuttering, which was unlike her usually bold and self-assured character.

Her father remained silent and only gaze into her eyes with...with lust and need. Slightly trembling from the reality, Bianca inspected his nude body, all the way from his handsome, longing face, down to his chest and midsection and eventually her eyes found his manhood- which proudly stood to attention; long and hard- she nearly gasped at the sight but instead she strictly contained herself.

Was this really happening?

The water splashed onto Bianca's back as she backed away from her nearing father. She thought he must have damn lost his mind, but it was only when she spotted that smug smirk on his face, she then realized that he was fully aware of his actions and enjoying tormenting her.

"You know what i'm doing here Bianca, i can see the desire and need in your eyes." He spoke near her face, his 6ft2 figure towering over her 5ft6 one. His deep voice was coarse yet creamy and low- the sexiest she'd ever heard. "I've seen how you look at me-"

"No!" Bianca's attempt at protesting only ended up sounding more like a tiny, prompting whimper of delight.

"-how you lose your breath every time i'm near you." He continued his hand tracing the soft skin of her cheek before reaching her wet lips and parting them with his thumb. "How you shudder at the slightest of touches- i know you want me Bianca."

This couldn't be happening, how did he...how did he...

"Yes daddy." Bianca boldly nodded her head. "I do want you, I've always wanted you." She admitted confidently.

Her father softly chuckled," so you're not even going to try to deny it-" he muttered into her ear, "your not going to deny wanting your father little girl?"

"No." She leaned forward and whispered lowly close to his ear, "Because I know you want me too."

Nothing more was said, the atmosphere reaked of s****l tension.

Her father growled dimly in her ear before his large, rough hands tightly groped her firm ass before he abruptly lifted her up and slammed her back onto the hard stone wall of the shower-

With a gasp, Bianca's eyes instantly flew open and she arched her back forward reflexively. It only took her a few seconds to recognize her surroundings. Peeking her head out of the cubicle, her eyes fell on her closed door, the door she'd locked, denying anyone access.

How pathetic can you get?! You're daydreaming about your father in the f*****g shower?!

You're pathetic!

You're pathetic!

You're pathetic Bianca!

"Maybe i just need to get banged." She muttered to herself while proceeding with her bath. She knew quite well that this wasn't just a case of s****l frustration- she'd just been f****d for an entire hour just last night and quite honestly, she wasn't deprived of s*x- that need was very much fulfilled and catered for....so why was she acting like this??

Bianca felt that familiar wetness between her thighs- which she endeavored successfully to wisely ignore, since her time was very much limited and she'd hate nothing more than to taint her reputation as the" perfect student "

By the time she'd showered and dressed, her father had already left- which she was thankful for- she couldn't bare to look at him, not after the little scene her mind had woven earlier.

She'd not even made it to school yet and the day had already taken some very bad,distasteful turns.

This is going to be one heck of a Friday.

■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■

Bianca hadn't been able to concentrate at all in class, which wasn't surprising- her mind had been pondering on the morning occurrences all day. Even as she walked to the Principal's office, the tantalizing thoughts still attacked her mind and she remembered that she hadn't told her father that the meeting had been rescheduled to today. Yet again she was going to be embarrassed- all on her own accord.

It had been concluded; something was seriously wrong with her.

Drawing in some air, Bianca stood in front of her principal's door for some seconds before mustering the strength to knock- she wasn't prepared for the awkwardness, for the humiliation she was about to put herself through. As she softly pushed the door open, the urge to scream nearly got to her, until she saw her father chatting with the man behind the desk.

"Oh Bianca!Come in." The man waved her over with the largest smile. "Take a sit. Your father and i were just talking about you." His eccentric, amber brown eyes stared at her.

"About only the good things i hope. " Bianca returned a smile before settling next to her father.

"Of course sweetheart. Principal Ambrose was just telling me how outstanding you are as a fighter, he tells me even the boys are intimidated by you." Her father looked the most content she'd seen him in a while.

Seeing him so proud- made her happy.

"Outstanding doesn't even begin to describe your daughter Mr Lewis, she's the epitome of a perfect student, i don't think the school will ever again witness such excellence, brilliance and impeccability again." The man fervidly sang her praises, his voice was laden with obtrusive adoration and admiration- which Bianca could have relished to the fullest if her mind wasn't so preoccupied with disciplining her eyes not to look at her father's crotch or stare at him in general.

Ivan Ambrose sure knew how to uplift and upgrade a being to a higher eminence and stature than they truly held. He painted her out as this chaste, innocent, well behaved, hardworking angel- the perfect student as he called her and her father only nodded proudly as he spoke.

If only he knew!

Her; Bianca Alicia Lewis- innocent and well behaved- it had to be a joke. Mr Gunners and all the other teachers who'd chosen to resign than to have to deal with her torment, would very much disagree.

Bianca was glad to be able to just fade into the background as the two men stirred the conversation, it's not that she was the quiet type- hardly, she just wouldn't be able to concentrate long enough to respond correctly anyways. She had been on the edge the entire time, the proximity of her father was making her uncomfortable, yet her eyes longed for him and she had to refrain from staring at him. Suddenly her father's arm extended and his hand searched for hers, Bianca quickly pulled it away from his reach and consequently his hand landed on her bare thigh instead. She thought he'd waste no time removing it but he didn't- he let it stay there, only the slightest patched to her warm skin,with not a bit of movement. It was cold, delightfully cold- the temperature differences made tiny, crisp shivers jolt up her spine and her heart went erratic.

Turning her head to the side, she glanced at him- he was stolid, not even a bit fazed, he felt none of the emotions she felt- this was just all too normal for him, he was just a loving father, placing a loving hand on his daughter's bare thigh- This frustrated Bianca extremely.

Twenty minutes passed before the assessment had come to an end. It was only then that her father chose to remove his taunting hand.

"Have a great weekend Mr Lewis, you too Bianca. " The men shook hands, both on their feet.

"You too Mr Ambrose, once again i apologize for the inconvenience i caused you by not showing up yesterday. "

"Like i said before, i understand, we have to unfortunately follow a schedule and we can't always cater for all important events in our lives."

"See you on Monday Principal Ambrose. " Bianca blurted out quickly and gave the man a brief side hug.

"Can't wait to get out of here i see." The man softly chuckled. "I understand, it is a Friday after all, see you on Monday Bianca. " The man gave her an endearing smile.

He either likes to smile a lot,is gay, one of those people who are always happy and bubbly or......i wouldn't put it past him, or any man for that matter.

"Are you still mad at me? You're awfully quiet, it's unusual to have gone this long without an eye roll or a 'whatever daddy'." Her father laughed softly, even though he'd clearly mocked her, his words made her light up inside.

"I do not sound like that." She pretended to be offended and pouted like a child.

"I'm very proud of you sweetheart. I know we have our differences and argue most of the time but i couldn't have asked for a better daughter than you." Her father wrapped his arm around her shoulders and brought her head closer to his chest as they walked.

Bianca snuggled closer to him, enjoying the moment she rarely got to share with him- she loved his affectionate side. She opened her mouth to speak, to tell him he was forgiven but before a single word could come out, she was interrupted. She had ruined the entire mood!!!

"Hi Mr Lewis." Stacy dramatically made herself noticed, beaming as she walked besides him.

"Oh hi Stacy." Her father of course greeted sweetly. Bianca bitterly rolled her eyes. "We're heading straight home, you could catch a ride with us."

"I'd love to!" Stacy nearly squeaked like a child unwrapping a Christmas gift. She flashed him her biggest smile.

"Isn't your boyfriend Josh going to pick you up?" Bianca grunted, making sure to put emphasis on "boyfriend " even though she knew the girl couldn't care if she had a boyfriend or not,if she saw what she liked, she gladly jumped on it without a moment of hesitation. She was in some regards just like her- a shameless slut who only cares about her needs.

"No, he's left already. I really hope i won't be a bother, i could just call Uber or ask my friends for a ride." Stacy muttered lowly, fully taking on the "pity me" role.

Of course the b***h she called her best friend would guilt trip her father, she could do way worse than that if the opportunity presented itself.

Why don't you do just that then?

Fucking tramp.

"Of course you won't be a bother Stacy, you'd never be a bother to me, you're like a daughter to me." Her father stated as he unlocked his car. Immediately Bianca detached herself from him- she was fuming,soon, she could feel it, soon she'd blow up.

You're like a daughter to me! She mocked him inwardly. In all her bitterness and spite, Bianca sat in the back instead of the front as always.

Stacy blissfully seized the opportunity and hopped in the front. During the drive Stacy and her father made small talk and Stacy laughed at every single word he said, she even threw in an overly flirtatious compliment here and there- it was like she wasn't even there, like she didn't exist, and that made her furious, livid, angry, enraged, outraged but most importantly-

It made her jealous.

There was no use being in denial at this point, everything made perfect sense now- why she hated that crude blonde Stephanie so much, why she felt the burning urge to strangle Stacy every time she got close to her father, why she felt like setting the entire world ablaze every time he gave another female attention; like the way he'd help her devious neighbors who posed as f*****g damsels in distress just to get to touch him, invite him over for dinner to thank him and to try to seduce him later.

It absolutely made sense.

She wasn't just being a naturally territorial daughter.

The feelings had always been there, she'd just been careful to suppress them and starve them of attention so they wouldn't grow to be unbearable.

But now she knew what she wanted, what she'd been missing all along and as wrong and as immoral as it might be- she was going to after it, no matter what and she wasn't going to stop until she succeeded.

She was Bianca of course.