You're To Blame

Sing For Me (3)

Chapter 7: Sing For Me (3)

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Change of Perspective: Estella’s POV

“You’re more than this! You can become someone!” That weird talent manager’s words were ringing in my head over and over again.

“…what a load of bullshit…” I mumbled under my breath while unlocking my front door…

“I’m back… and the apartment is a mess again… f**k…” I wished I could be welcomed warmly by my boyfriend at least once, but all I could see upon opening the door was his pants and socks on the ground. As I’m his maid he’s waiting around on me to pick things up…

Whatever…

“Babe, are you playing that game again? How about helping me out a bit, huh?” I stood at the door to his room where he was playing the same online game with his buddies on call.

“Shut up! I’m in the final stages of this boss, if I don’t kill him now I never will.” He shot back at me angrily.

“Good for you then…” I replied carelessly and headed back to the living room. It was such a mess that I didn’t even feel like cleaning up anymore…

But I have to, or else…

Suddenly all my thoughts disappeared when I saw a silver sing on the floor. I felt like my heart would stop when I picked it up. It was too small and too girly to be something he would wear…

I headed back to his gaming room. “Babe?” I called out to him.

“What is it now?” Angrily he snapped back at me without even bothering to turn around.

“This ring on the floor, who’s is it?” I asked him and he looked confused.

“A ring?” He continued playing while pretending to be thinking.

“Yeah, who’s is it?” I asked him.

“Yours, who else?” He replied without much hesitation.

“Its silver though…” I remarked.

“And?” He didn’t seem to understand.

“I don’t wear silver. So who’s is it?” I asked him again. Was I doing it out of anger or because I hoped that it would turn out to be something else?

“What do you want to hear from me, babe? You must have bought this one, or maybe you just forgot about it.” Now he was trying to outright lie to me…

“Yeah, right… Give me your phone.” I said while reaching me hand out.

“I can’t right now, the boss is-” He tried to stop me while still playing his game but I managed to grab it without issue.

Looking further into his messages… the deleted ones that he hadn’t completely gotten rid of, I saw exactly what I was expecting to see there… “Ah… d**k pics… to so many girls… a few even sent you some pictures back…”

“That’s just.” For the first time in a long while my boyfriend stopped playing his stupid game and turned around to face me.

“Get out of my house.” I couldn’t even yell at him properly, the anger, the frustration all of it seeping into one I just uttered those words.

“You can’t kick me out, I live here as well.” He stood up all huffy and puffy.

“Get out, now.” I repeated myself not knowing what else to do.

“Babe! You really should calm down. You won’t like me when I’m angry.” Suddenly he grabbed me by the wrist and glared at me.

“Are you threatening me?” I asked him in disbelief.

“I told you already I’m not cheating, these things mean nothing, it’s like a joke. I’ve never brought a girl here before…” He continued trying to convince me.

“Ha… really… Let go of me right now and leave.” I gave him one opportunity but he as per usual screwed it up…

“Or, what? You can’t break up with me you know? Who else will love you? I was there when that scumbag cheated on you and I was there when you were no longer friends with that b***h Jeannine. You can’t do this to me.” He was right, I was very hurt when we started dating… maybe I had become a bit emotionally dependent on him but it was because I thought he would never cheat on me no matter what…

“Let go of me, we’re breaking up- gh.!” As I repeated myself he pinned me against the wall with full force. I felt my breath leave my lungs as I stared at him. He slapped me across the face as if to solidify my thoughts about him. I hated this man now…

“I didn’t want to hit you babe, but you just make me so angry…” He tried to act innocent in the next moment as he let go of me.

“……..you just hit me?” I asked him while holding onto my burning cheek, I felt angrier than ever before.

“Yeah but it’s your fault for- GHaaa!!! f**k, that hurts!” Before he could finish his sentence I kicked him in between the legs and pulled his arm twisting it in the opposite direction of where it should be.

“I want you gone or dead… which one do you prefer?” I asked him, I had been taking self defense classes for years, plus jui jutsu and may tai. I had been too strartled to react at first but laying hands on me will never be something I accept kindly.

“f**k, I just give me a moment to collect my stuff.” He said while I dragged him towards the door.

“You don’t need a moment. Get out, I’ll give you your stuff some other time.” I pushed him out and shut the door locking it tightly.

“Babe, I’m sorry for hitting you, I’m really sorry!” He continued apologizing outside my door.

“Leave or I will call the police.” I warned him.

“f**k! Don’t be stupid! You love me, right? So why does it matter if I cheated? You know that I never meant to hurt you.” Was he trying to get back at me or apologize? I couldn’t understand his temper… I don’t remember him ever being like this before…

“Babe! Open the door now!” He continued.

“The police are called, but feel free to stick around you trash bag!” I shot back at him. But that didn’t feel like it was enough, he had began trying to tear down my front door. So I did something a bit messy.

I threw off the second floor his PS5 that I had hastily got off the cables mid game.

“What?! That’s my PS5! Don’t!!!” He barely managed to utter words while seeing it hanging off the edge of the window.

“s**t, not my games, s**t… this… you b***h! You stupid f*****g bitch.” He got angry but did it matter? I was the one that bought it for us both to play, and he just ended up using it all by himself.

“The longer you stay here the more I will throw out, make your choice, leave or do you want the rest of your stuff before that?” I warned him.

“I’m leaving! f**k…” He finally headed out. I didn’t really know or care where this guy would ultimately end up. He disappointed me more than I thought he ever could…

“Damn loser… why did I ever… when did my life start looking like this? I wonder…” It had been a while… since I felt loved but I foolishly thought we could make it through it together somehow.

“…that business card… as if I need that…” I picked out of my pocket the business card the manager had given me. I crumbled it up and threw it away.

I sat in front of the TV and turned it on, the loud volume at which it was on gave me an instant headache. “Today we have a very special guest, it’s the one and only Jeanine! She is here to make a very special announcement!”

“f**k… why is it her? Always her… I see her whenever I have the worst day…” I turned the volume down but still stared at the screen with her pretty face on. I couldn’t look away… she was radiant.

“……….?” I don’t know why but… I grabbed the business card and dialed his number. It was impulsive but at that moment it’s what I felt I had to do.

“Hey. I’ll do that talent thing you mentioned… does it pay well?” I asked him, maybe I was looking for an excuse. I had seen another message from my manager at my waitress job asking me to come into work.

“How much do you need?” Jeremiah asked me over the phone. He seemed hopeful now that I’d given him a call.

“Enough to pay my school fees… and also for a deposit, I want to move out. Can you do that?” I finally asked him, at this point I just don’t have much to lose do I? If it doesn’t work out then I can just go back to how things used to be but…

“Well… if you get signed to our agency you will get a bonus but that’s only if we also secure a role-” I cut him off.

“Can you do it or not?” I asked him straight on.

“It’s not a guarantee and-” He began trying to explain.

“Ah, useless-” Before I could end the call however he stopped me.

“No! Wait! I will loan you the money, alright? From my own paycheck… you just need to work and you’ll pay me back when you get your bonus. Is that alright?” Jeremiah asked me with a near pleading voice once more.

“Hm… good. Just one question.” I agreed. “Why are you willing to go so far for a no name talent?”

Jeremiah was quiet for a while until I finally heard his delayed response… “As I mentioned before… the agency is pressuring me to cultivate a new star like Jeanine… your ex friend.”

“Right… nine months then.” I told him.

“Excuse me?” Jeremiah seemed bewildered.

“I will do it in six months. You said I could do it for a year, but I won’t need that long.” I told him. It was the decision I made.

“…alright! I like your enthusiasm! You have to come to DreamNT on Monday for the script reading. I’ll help you with memorization and the like, then you’ll be in for a private interview with a few of the associates.” Jeremiah was enthusiastic as ever, he seemed ready.

“Fine, arrange for it.” I agreed easily.

“Thank you! You’re really going to make a difference in this industry, I swear!” The endless flood of grattitute from this man was more than I could take.

“Right, bye now…” I ended the call right after. Then laying on my back onto the couch I could only think about it all…

A difference? I only want to get back at them for doing me dirty…

Jeanine… and all those cheating bastards… you should all go to Hell one after another…

And I know my success is a sure way to bring you two down there… and if that doesn’t do it… then I’ll be sure to think of something even better…