Not Another One Hit Wonder

Chapter 3-1

Chapter 3

Change of plans.

I make a right turn from the middle lane—thank God there are no other cars on the road this early—and head away from the ambulance with its flashing lights. Riley notices. Looking back over her shoulder, she cries, “Daddy! You’re going the wrong way!”

“Mrs. Duran is busy right now,” I tell her.

I hate lying to her about it, but I’m too distracted to answer all the questions I know will follow. Even at six years old, she knows about death, how could she not? Many parents try to shield their children from it, as if death wasn’t a natural part of life but rather something shameful or violent, something to be hidden away and talked about only when necessary. But pretending it doesn’t exist only vilifies it, making kids scared of something that happens to all of us in the end. Lisa and I understood about death earlier than most others our age. Even before we knew about s*x, we knew about death, which demystified it and made us comfortable around the dead and the dying, and those left behind.

I’ve tried to raise Riley the same way, but this…this is so unexpected, I drive for a few blocks away from Mrs. Duran’s house trying to wrap my mind around it. I’m torn about turning around and going back—I need to head over there eventually, I’m right here, might as well do it now—but there’s Riley to consider. Yes, she knows we all die, but that doesn’t mean I want her to get an up close and personal view of it so soon.

So what am I supposed to do with her now? I can’t drop her off at school, I can’t take her to work with me, and the only person who ever babysits her won’t be doing so ever again.

Shit.

I look around, trying to figure out where we are. My mind’s turning in circles but my car is on autopilot—without realizing it, I’ve driven out of the clutch of suburban homes and am heading down one of the larger streets in town, angling for the funeral home out of habit. I don’t want to take Riley there at the moment. Maybe I should call Henry to help out Taylor after all…

Molly.

It’s still early enough that, when I call her, she hasn’t left for work yet, which is saying something—she’s usually there well before I get in every morning, a pot of free coffee brewing as she checks voicemail. Quickly I ask if she could get Riley off to school this morning while I assist with the removal.

“Oh sure, Mr. Eckert,” Molly says—she used to call me Jamie until I became her boss, and now it’s Mr. Eckert no matter how many times I tell her she doesn’t have to be so formal with me. “Bring her by, she’s a real sweetie. But I thought you had Delores watching her.”

With a glance in the rearview mirror at Riley, I say, “That’s my removal.”

Molly lets out a little gasp of surprise. “Oh dear. You’ll have to tell me all about it later. Riley didn’t see anything, did she?”

“No, she doesn’t know.” I risk another glance in the mirror, but Riley pulled a storybook out of her school bag and is flipping through the pages as she talks softly under her breath. She doesn’t read yet, but she tries.

“Good, good.” Molly sighs. “What a shame. I hope someone can get in touch with her son. What’s his name again? Donny? No, that’s not right…”

Derek. His name shoots through me like electricity, giving me another unsettling jolt on a morning already full of enough surprises.

“Look, Molly, I have to go.”

She chuckles. “Right, right. See you when you get here.”

As I drop the phone back onto the passenger seat, Riley looks up from her book, her gaze meeting mine in the rearview mirror. She gives me a soft, sad smile, as if she knows I’m having a rough day and she wants to make it better somehow.

Forcing myself to smile back, I tell her, “We’re going to see Ms. Molly this morning. How’s that sound?”

A small crease furrows Riley’s brow. “Why? Did Mrs. Duran die?”

I open my mouth to reply but nothing comes out. I don’t know what to say. The truth…taking a deep breath to steel myself for more questions, I admit, “Yes, honey. I think she did.”

“It’s okay,” Riley tells me, turning back to her book. “That happens sometimes.”