BATTLING FEARS

Rich but dumb...

I find it really difficult to give in to men. No! Not because my specs were too rare or my expectations

were out of this world. I wasn’t that inquisitive. I had trust issues when it came to offering my heart

someone especially when I am not entirely sure of your intentions towards me. Despite being a picky, proud-viewed girl who turned down almost all the guys in my faculty, I still ended up with a very abusive

boyfriend who wasn’t aware of what anxiety really was.

Don’t worry, I will fill you in on how this all happened. This all started during drama club while I tried

acting the role of a business woman in a short comedy drama. One of the guys thought my acting was

dumb and threw an empty water bottle at me. I panicked and dodged immediately fearing for my life. It

narrowly went above my head.

“Who the heck did that?!” Drake called out in shock as he climbed onto the stage. “Are you fine

Maureen?” I nodded. He smiled nicely and escorted me off the stage.

“You are doing a really great job. You just need to pay attention to the audience more. You aren’t facing

them and they are mad. Your viewers hate it when you don’t interact with them.”

“I understand. I will do better next time”

“Don’t be shy. It’s just acting” He chuckled with his hands crossed on his chest. The mention of shy made

me really angry at this point. Shy?! This dude thinks I am shy? Do you know how much I can do without

your help you creep? I never said those words out.

“I am not shy. I just have anxiety” I responded with a stern look.

“I am serious Maureen. There is no need for you to fear. By the way I am Drake. You seem like a pretty

interesting lady to spend time with. How about we hang out this evening after our last class?” He asked

with a wink. I felt totally awkward at this request.

“Huh? A date?” I exclaimed in confusion. Drake?, The most talented guy out there. Why would he wish

to go out with a girl like her? “Sorry I can’t…”

“Yes you can and you will…” He insisted with another wink stroking his beard.

“Excuse me?”

“Look, I want to get to know you better. Come on, it won’t hurt if you try me out ones. I will pick you at

6” At this words he threw her friendly smile and walked off to join the other students. I felt a thrill go

down my spine. A kind of thrill I hadn’t gotten in a very long time. Well, not since when I saw Vixen

kissing that lady…let’s not talk about it. This could be a chance for me to move on and perhaps forget

Vixen for good.

Later that evening, I opened up my wardrobe and selected a orange tank top and white pair of trousers.

I bonded my full long hair as a pony tail and decorated it with a white hair clip. After dressing up, I

applied my Victoria secret summery scent perfume and danced around the mirror in a while.

“He is already here gal!” My roommate had informed me as she stared out the window beside her bed.

Our room was located close to the gate area and located in the second floor so it was quiet easy for her

to see everything that went on at the gate. 

“How do I look flower flower?” I asked with a big grin.

“You look totally simple for a lady going to date the future D.O social of the college. I mean what’s

wrong with a short strap gown and a pair of fancy shoes. You know…a little make up. I have all those but

next time we will handle this situation. You never told me you were going out with that famous guy. I

am in accounting and I already know everything about his life. I mean…”

“Bye! You talk too much” I interrupted and jogged off. Goodness! That took forever. That was the issue

with Diana. She doesn’t know when to stop talking ones she starts. I arrived to the gate and got totally

amazed at the sight of Drake’s car parked in front of the hostel. It was a Ferrari 458 Speciale 2015.

Students didn’t seem surprise at the sight but I was totally knocked off. I knew he was rich…but…but not

this rich.

“I prefer to walk” I told him with an embarrassed and displeased look.

“It’s fine. It’s my dad’s car. Don’t tell anyone. You look good by the way” He complemented as he got

into the car. I blushed a little because the whole look was my idea but I tried as much as possible to

control my emotions and got in with him.

“Have you ever been with someone before?” He asked as he steered his wheel to the left of the campus.

“In what way exactly?” I needed more explanation on this.

“I mean it’s been two semesters. Have you dated anyone yet?” I laughed briefly and raised my

eyebrows.

“No. I couldn’t trust anyone” I responded with a smile.

“I am a lucky guy then don’t worry. You can trust me”

He drove around the campus for ten minutes and halted beside the school horticulture. I knew I loved

flowers but flowers on a first date…

“Is this where you wanna take me?” I asked in confusion.

“Sure. I thought girls love flowers”

“I love them but it’s not the idea for a date. Only dumb girls will love this. I prefer the beach or zoo not

here…”

“I love that mindset. I adore this side of you. You really have that strong personality I love in a lady. You

don’t let all this petty stuffs move you easily. You have that confidence in there. You just have to get rid

of the shyness”

“I am not shy…”

“It’s fine. I have a family friend who is totally like you. Her brother tries for her but…"

“But what…”

“It’s a long story. I don’t wanna ruin our date” He started the engine and drove toward the exit of the

garden. Throughout the drive I couldn’t help but think if he knew the difference between anxiety and

shyness. One could easily get over shyness but not anxiety. Anxiety was a psychological issue which

needed therapy and treatment. I refused to go for any because I hated the hospital but I never really

expected him not to know all this. I mean everyone knows how much different this two were. Right? Do

y’all?

We arrived to the beach and spent some time with each other enjoying the sensory view of the sunset.

We spoke about our lives and few parts of or childhood. I can just conclude we learnt a bit about each

other even though he refuses to talk about his family affairs or believe I had social phobia. I told him

about Vixen but never mentioned his name due to privacy. He had no much interest in me discussing

about other guys. He immediately deviated the discussion to himself instead which kind of irritated me a

little. He brought up the idea for us to date each other and become romantic partners. I didn’t wish to

accept this proposal fast especially with all the negative signals I have been getting but his eyes, his

smile…the way he stared at me and fondled with my cheek… the way he listened to me…it seems totally

out of this world.