On the way to the dress shop I tell grandma about meeting Noah in the park when I was running. She has a grin on her face.
“I always knew you liked him. Even before you left for college.” She giggles like a little kid.
“Yeah. He’s so nice grandma, but well out of my league. He would never be interested in someone like me.” I say as I park the car up.
“You are a beautiful young lady, and he would be lucky to have you" yeah ok. She’s just saying that because I’m her granddaughter. I shake my head at her as we head inside the shop. Which just happens to be Noah’s mums shop.
“Callie" a girl shouts as I close the door behind me.
“Hey Alesha" I say as she walks over to me and hugs me tight.
“You look amazing.” She tells me. I shake my head in denial.
“I really don’t but thanks. You look really good. How are you? You working here now?” I ask as we wait for Zoe to arrive.
“Yeah. I had to follow in my mums footsteps, it’s amazing. The place is so busy all the time and I’ve met a few famous actresses whilst working here.” She says as she shows me the photo collage on the wall of famous faces that have been in the shop.
Zoe eventually arrives and is pulled into a fitting room. Alice and Sophie are working on her dress together, there are loads of people wandering about. This place really is busy.
“Callie, your gran was just telling me you got a job working with Gary Marshall.” Alice says as she hands me yet another cup of coffee.
“Yeah, start Monday. I was actually really surprised he hired me so quickly."
“You have the qualifications from what your grandma said, and you got the best grades in your field" oh god my gran needs to stop chatting about me all the time.
“Yeah. I did. I was more worried about what he would have thought about who my mother is" I whisper not wanting my gran to hear me.
“Oh sweetie. You are not your mother. You are nothing like her, you are more like you dad every time I see you. You should be proud of yourself, you have done amazing. I don’t want to hear you putting yourself down like that again.” Alice says as she pulls me into a hug.
“Mrs Black, how can you say that after everything my mother put you through? You should hate me not stand and say these nice things to me."
“Why should I hate you? You were a tiny baby when all that happened. Just because Sammy is your mother does not mean I will blame you or hate you.” She tells me again, wrapping her arms around me and leading me to the back of the shop into the kitchen area.
“Seriously Callie. What happened with your dad and I and Sammy was such a long time ago. You have to move past it. Yes there will always be people gossiping and chatting s**t about your mum. But you are not her. You are nothing like her.”
“Thank you. That means the world to me. I will never forgive my mother for what she did to you and your family. “ I say as a tear drips down my chin.
“You are an amazing young lady. Martin would be so proud of you. I just know he would be over the moon that you followed in his footsteps with your career choice.” She says as we walk back through to the front of the shop.
I quickly compose myself as my grandma sees me. She always knows when I’m upset or emotional, I don’t want to worry her with my stupid issues.
We all chat together as Zoe gets changed after her fitting. The dress is stunning, but then all the dresses from this shop are. Alice and Sophie are the best in the business for wedding gowns.
Alesha and Zoe are trying to persuade me to go out tonight, I’m just not feeling it at all. Even after my chat with Alice I still feel like my mothers reputation will forever be hanging over me.
“I’ll think about it.” I tell them hoping it will stop them from going on.
Once we get back home it’s well after lunch time, so we just make a snack to fill us up until dinner time. As I help my grandpa in the garden we talk about my future.
“You know we still own your dads house. The family renting it might be moving out soon. Would you consider moving into it?” grandpa asks.
“Trying to get rid of me already grandpa" I joke with him.
“No sweetie, never. You always have a home here. I just thought you would like your independence and your own space, since you were living away for these years.” He goes on to say as we finish up with the pots of flowers.
“I hadn’t really thought about dads place. It would make sense since we own it" I say as we walk into the kitchen and wash our hands.
“It’s your property, sweetie. You can sell it or keep renting it out, it’s up to you. Just know that me and your grandma will support what ever choice you make” he hugs me tight.
I suppose it does make sense. I own the house. My dad did leave it to my mother but before she went into prison, she tried to sell it, but it all fell through and my grandparents made her sign everything over to me. Every penny my dad left her, including shares and the house. I know I don’t want to sell it. It’s the only thing I really have that was my dads. My grandparents have so many memories in that house of him, I couldn’t get rid of it just like that.
After dinner I had decided not to go out with Zack and Zoe. I was just not feeling myself. After the conversation with Alice earlier about my mother and then grandpa talking about my dads house, I was feeling too emotional to go out.
I went up to my room to sort out my clothes, I start work on Monday, but I don’t really have much office attire. I might need to go shopping and pick up a few blouses and trouser suits for the office.
Tina calls me for a catch up. I tell her what Alice says and my grandpa and she agreed with both of them. She says I’m thinking about the past too much and need to move on. Which for me is easier said than done. I feel like I never got any closure from my relationship with my mum.
I obviously don’t remember her when I was a baby, she was in prison my whole childhood and when she got out when I was 16 she only came to see me thinking my grandparents would give her money. The fact I haven’t seen her since or had any contact since makes me angry and upset.
I did try to get in contact with her, but she never replied to any of my efforts. My other grandmother died a few years after my mum went to prison, so I know she didn’t have anyone else to turn to. I really thought prison would have changed her, but she came across as just horrible as all the stories I had heard.
Maybe Tina and Alice are right. I need to let go, move on and concentrate on me. My life. My career. I need to forget about my mothers past and look to the future. My future.