Girls Can't Play

"I'm so sorry for doing this to you sweetheart." Jamie looked up and stared right into her mother's regretful expression. “Yep, definitely sorry. No surprise there,” she thought. “It’s okay mum. You don’t have to apologize," she lied. There was just no point in trying to fight her mother's decisions anymore. She knew this was coming the moment her mother called to say they would be eating out at the Blue Electric, Saltfall's fancy restaurant. It was always the same. Had been since the first ever move that Jamie could remember. She was only eight at the time and her mother had just broken up with the ‘love of her life’ as she called him. With tears in her eyes, she had dragged Jamie to eat out at that town’s fancy restaurant too as if to celebrate that tragedy and once they were done, she announced they would be leaving town the next day. Jamie had cried, not only over never seeing Matthew who had been like a father figure to her, but over having to leave all her friends and her life behind. “Is Charlie coming too?” She asked even when she knew the answer. “Oh sweetheart…" Her mother reached for her hands that Jamie had hidden under the table, hoping to hide even the slightest twitch over her mother’s announcement. She wasn’t about to be the reason that would force Kerry Parker to endure staying in a place that she did not want to. The last time Jamie had asked for them to stay, because she couldn’t bear leaving the life they'd had behind, her mother had agreed. But that lasted only a few weeks before she started being weird and indirectly blaming Jamie for not letting her free to heal her broken heart. “Charlie and I sort of fell out. I guess it was never meant to be.” It never was and never would be. Not for her mother who always ran at the slightest view of trouble in a relationship. And definitely not when it wasn't Jamie's late father. The only angel who could never do wrong in Kerry Parker's eyes. Theirs had been a beautiful love story. One that was swoon worthy, but Jamie wished her mother would move on after all these years. On the bright side though, there was no stream of tears from her mother's eyes this time around, so no curious looks towards their table that would have Jamie wishing for the ground to swallow her. "Do I still get to play?” At that, her mother’s face lit up. Letting go of her hands, Kerry reached into her purse and brought out a single piece of paper and handed it over to her. “They have the best scholarship program and try outs are the day after tomorrow.” In short, get packing. “Thanks mom.” Because playing football was all Jamie cared about, she could live with this. As long as she got to do that, she didn’t care for anything else. At least her mom knew that and made sure she'd get that opportunity wherever she dragged her to. Jamie carefully put the flier for the local high school away for later, grateful that despite everything, her mother still cared about her dream. “I really am sorry, baby.” Her mother apologized once more. "This is going to be the last time, I promise." “It’s okay. Can we eat now?” Jamie fought the urge to scoff at her mother. The last time? That promise had remained unfulfilled too many times, it literally meant nothing to her now. “Are you sure?” “Positive.” What else could she say? That she would miss her teammates, her life, even Charlie just because he had turned out to be a decent human being that loved her mother unlike the last couple of douchebags she had dated? It would change nothing, so she wasn't even going to waste her breath. Dinner flowed easily, with her mother ignoring her ‘broken heart’ and excitedly filling their conversation with everything she needed to know about their new home while Jamie only nodded to whatever her mother said without actually listening to any of it. The only thing she bothered with was the name of the their new destination and only because she would google it later for the purposes of seeing the place for what it was and not what her mother painted it out to be. Kerry Parker tended to turn into a conny salesman when she was out to convince her of the beauty of where they were headed. Midburn, their new home, turned out to be some small town north of their current location. Pretty far from Saltfall, Jamie noted. Maybe her mother was really intent on forgetting Charlie if she was willing to tuck herself away in some small town that seemed to be located at the end of the world. With the town’s small square mile radius displayed on her google maps, Jamie was sure, everyone knew everyone there. She sighed at the thought, but quickly decided that that arrangement wasn’t going to bother her. Not when she had learned over the years to be invisible when she wanted. She lazily scrolled through her Google search and her eyes lit up when she spotted it. "Mom, its a football loving town!" She exclaimed. "I thought you might like that." Eyes focused on the road ahead, the corners of her mother's lips curved. 'Like' felt like an understatement as Jamie scrolled through excitedly, not knowing which article to read first. This just turned out to be one move she was going to love. Midburn literally lived and breathed football. The Cougar Devils, its local high school football team, was one hell of a team with too many accolades to it's name. She frowned though when she couldn't spot a girl's version of the team. "Probably not as successful maybe?" She thought. But that did not matter. With the success of the boy's team alone, Jamie had no doubt scouts would be flocking there. Maybe she was finally going to be noticed. "I can't wait, mom" "Glad to hear that sweetheart. Makes two of us," her mother beamed. With how excited Jamie was now, she knew her mother was finally convinced that she was okay with the move. She was more than okay, actually. A small town meant less competition for scouts and more exposure on the pitch. And she was going to make damn sure she used every opportunity to impress. “Anyone you’d like to say bye to?” Her mother asked over the music as they drove back home to pack up. “Just my team. Will give them a call once I’m done packing.” “You could go over in the morning and say a proper goodbye, you know? There is no rush.” Jamie hated goodbyes and saw no point in them either. They would just dampen her current mood too. “Don’t need to.” Shoving her phone in her pocket, she jumped out of the car the moment it stopped in front of their apartment that she had called home for barely a quarter of the year. "Are you sure, honey?" "I'm pretty sure no one's going to miss me. It's not like we've been here that long." She turned before the hurt could cloud her mother's eyes. She couldn't deal with that right now. "I'll just get on with packing." Her heart stilled when she stepped into her room. The one place that despite where she was set up, reflected her world and who she was. Trophies, replica jerseys, football memorabilia, in here she felt like she could control everything and dream big. Her lips curved at the huge poster just above her bed displaying her idol. Emerson Walker, World's best goal keeper. It read. She traced it, feeling the usual bubble of motivation spring up in her. "This will be me one day. Just watch me." She smiled before carefully bringing the poster down and placing it in a box as she had done so many times before. It had become almost a ritual of hers. First up on the wall when moving in and first down when moving out. Doing that, kind of represented what mattered to her, albeit in a weird way. "Hey." Startled, Jamie spun around at the sound of her mother's voice. "Mom?" "Sorry, didn't mean to disturb, I just wanted you to have this." "Can we even afford these?" Swallowing the excitement at having the football boots she'd been eyeing for months in her hands, she shot her mother a questioning look. "It's the least I could do for you. I know how much you have to give up each time we move." "Mom…" Kerry Parker always apologized for her decisions, but this was…unexpected and so much more. "Are you sure?" "We can totally afford them, I promise. So don't worry about it and just enjoy them, okay?" "Thanks mom." Jamie hurled herself into her mother's arms as tears began to spill, her guard ripped apart by her mother's action. If only she also knew how to help her mother deal with the loss of her father in a more healthier way so that she could enjoy not just the boots but their entire damn life too. "With the opportunities Midburn presents, perhaps my luck is about to change." She thought. Perhaps she'd finally get spotted and her mother would find what she'd been looking for.