Blake is standing outside his house. His mother and father are fighting again. He can not stand it. He can not stand that his mother is crying and his father is laughing at her. He had about enough of this bullshit. He will sleep in his car again tonight. He has all money he can buy whatever he wants with, but what he craves the most, He wants his mother and father's love. They don't really care about him. he is their only son, but they live in their own worlds. He hates his father. His father is selfish and stays away from home for weeks. His mother is happy when his father comes home, but it does not last long. They start fighting soon after his father arrives and sleeps in his own bed, leaving his mother alone in the big bedroom. None of his friends knows about the nights he spends in his car. He uses to spend that night in his treehouse when he was younger. He is tired of crying. He prefers the nights his father spends his nights with his mistresses. His father has a house in the town where he keeps them.
The nights his father is not there, his mother cries most of the night, and it breaks his heart to hear her like that, but it is better than hearing his father mocking his mother when he is home. This year is his senior year in high school. He is planning on leaving the town for good. He wants to join the army as he knows it will piss off his father. He wants nothing to do with the man. He does not want to take over the business from his father. However, he is the only child, and his father will leave it to him. He hates everything that his father touches. His best friends are Paul and Clack Stevens. They have a little sister, and he always liked her. When they were young, he always thought she was like his little sister he never had. Now she is fifteen, almost sixteen, and he sees her in a different light. She is beautiful. She is the one girl that touches his cold heart.
He knows he has a reputation, but he does not care. She is any way out of his league, and her brothers will never allow him to date her, even when she comes to high school. He knows Bella is turning fifteen this year, and she will most probably start high school this year. He does not look forward to this year. He is in love with Bella Stevens, and he knows there is no future for them. He remembers the good old days.
They were all still young Bella is three years younger than them. She would follow the three boys everywhere. Paul and Clark will get a bit irritated with her. He would always help her if she felt down or could not keep up with them.
"Leave her alone. She is just a little girl and is not supposed to play with boys," Paul would say as he got irritated with his little sister. They did not know what a privilege it was to have someone looking up to you. They did not realize how he craved for a little brother or sister. He envied them. They had each other and a little sister. He had nobody. His parents were not happy together, and he watched Charlie and Valerie as they openly showed their love for each other. The twins did not know what they had in this life. They did not know how lucky they were to have parents that cared ad was always there for them. He had only himself and a mother that cried most of the time.
He tries to take care of his mother, but he sees her wasting away daily. She is weak. She is getting destroyed by a man that does not love her. He wonders why his parents even got married in the first place. He is angry when he thinks of them. They are both a bit selfish. Thinking only about themselves. They do not care about him. He is lonely at home and tries to avoid his home as much as possible. If only the twins knew what they had. They do not appreciate their parents and their little sister. Blake gets ready to go to school. His mother does not make any food, so he grabs an apple out of the fridge. They have chefs that cook in the afternoons and at nights. He eats well when he comes from school and at nights when his old man does not return home. As he gets ready for his last years in school, he hears his mother sobbing in her room. He walks up the stairs and looks at the thin lady lying on the bed.
"Why did you marry him?" He asks his mother. He never asked her this before, but he wanted to know for the first time in his life. His mother looks up at her son. She knows she is weak and never was there for him. She feels a bit guilty, but what can she do? She is heartbroken.
"He said he loved me, and he treated me great until after you were born. He stopped loving me when he got the money my parents gave me. He started his own business, and he left us behind, for all the whores he is keeping in his secret townhouse," She says. She sounds like a zombie. She is just naming facts.
"So I am the reason he is not home every night and screwing around?" Blake asks his mother. He can not help feeling like she is blaming him. Maybe that is why she can feel and care less where he is at nights.
"Go to school. You will be late. These are adult matters you don't have to concern yourself with, " She says but does not look her son in the eyes. Blake feels defeated. His own mother hates him for being born!
"I still care about you, although you hate me, obviously. You need to get something to eat," He says as he walks out. He can not get himself to call her mother. Like he never calls his father, father or dad. He calls them 'you'. It makes it not so personal to him. His young heart has been broken so many times by these two people he feels numb. He has a brand new Mustang his father bought him. He gets a new car every year. Many of the children at school envy him. If only they knew that he would give them everything these two people gives him, if only he can have the love from parents who cared about him.
He sees her standing there talking to other boys and girls. He looks at Bella. He knows he loves her and hates her at the same time. Why can she have everything he craves for? He wants one thing he wants happiness, and she can give it to him. He knows she will never be his as he respects her brothers too much. Blake's heart is breaking inside of him. He knows she is to good for him. He can not have her. Even if she wants him, he knows he will end up hurting her. He puts on his mask and walks to his friends. Paul and Clark are standing at the gate. They see Blake, and they come to greet him.
"Where the f**k have you been, bro?" Paul asks. Blake does not tell them he was at the navy academy this summer. He plans to join the army after school, but none of his friends needs to know this. They are all applying to universities and colleges. He can get a scholarship for his football, but he preferred to turn it down. He needs to get as far away from home as possible. He hates being close to his father. He does not even know what he feels about his mother at this moment. She basically just told him this morning she blames him for the trouble between her and his father. He smiles and laughs it off.
"You know me. I go where ever I want to go. I have been in California, and damn, the babes are hot there," Blake says, but he looks down. He can not look at his friends and lie to them. Paul and Clark know Blake. They know he is lying, but they don't ask him anything anymore. They know Blake pretend to be this badass, but they also know he is not as he pretends to be. They love Blake, and they know about his problems with his dad. They do not know about the nights he spends in his car outside or about his plans to go to the army after school. They know his father is an asshole. They feel sorry for Blake but will never show it.
Blake, on the other hand, feels their sympathy. He does not know why they feel sorry for him. He is sure he kept his secret well guarded. He is not happy. He looks at them and thinks to himself.
'I don't need your sympathy. One day you will all envy me as I envy you right now.'
He walks into the schoolyard with his friend and tries to ignore Bella. He does not want to see her, and he does not want her sympathy as well. His heart is cold as ice. He does not think he can love anyone at this moment. He is dead inside. His mother broke him. Sometimes you do not need to be abuse physically to be broken. Sometimes it just takes a few words for a parent to break a child. Blake feels like he has no goal in life as his life has been taken from him before it really started. He wants to hurt everyone around him as he is hurting right now. He looks at Bella. She is so pure and innocent. She is probably the only one he would not hurt, but he does not know. He may turn out to be like his father, and he can not take that chance with his Bella. He will always think of her as his. She is the only pure human he knows. He walks to his first class for the day and starts it by flirting with Clare. He knows she is always willing and will most probably flirt back. He knows he has to keep up his charades in front of the twins. They can never find out how he feels about Bella. He bets Bella will have a boyfriend before the end of this week. He saws how the guys are looking at her. He is jealous, but he can not show it.
Clark and Pauk look at their friend, they know something is bothering him, but they will never ask unless he wants to talk to them. Paul shakes his head. He thinks Blake is full of s**t. Everyone in town knows his father. Does he really think he can hide it from them forever? Clark feels sorry for their friend. They know he uses to hang out with them when things were terrible at home.
Blake smiles a sinister smile. He remembers Bella once asked him if he will marry her when they are older. He answered yes, made her stop crying as she had fallen off her bike while following the boys. He is sure she will never ask him that question again. He wishes she will. He would still probably say yes, bit make her promise never to let him go. He is feeling really sad today as his mother just gave him a heavy blow this morning. He will most probably never get to know the older Bella. he will leave to join the army next year.