HOME TEARS

Chapter Four

“No.” Dani shook her head. “Why were you with him, anyway?”

He laughed. “When he heard you were here and he was coming with or without me. I just hitched a ride.”

“It was a wasted trip.” She stepped around him and pulled out the key. Unlocking the door, she stepped inside, but turned around to block him from following her. She placed a hand against the doorframe. “You should’ve gone back with Jake, because I’m not letting you in.”

“Are you serious? I just want to—”

“I remember you from school, but that doesn’t mean I know you. And I’m not talking about my car. It’s not for sale and no, you can’t take it for a ride if you were going to ask.” She jerked her chin up, indicating behind him. “If I remember right, it’s a long walk from here to your place. You should get going if you want to get home before dark.”

Then she shut the door, locked it, and forgot about him, or tried to forget about it. She didn’t really. He was in the back of her mind, but what she said had been true. She didn’t know Jonah Bannon. She didn’t owe him anything either. He wanted her car, that was obvious, but it wasn’t until she got ready for bed that she started wondering if she’d been too hard on him. He came into the bar asking questions and not respecting the answers he was getting. He was like a tornado, but she had enough of those storms in her. She could only handle one at a time, and lying in bed, she hoped some of them were staying at bay.

She needed to sleep. Badly.

It was the screams first.

Then the babies started crying.

People running. It was so silent, but those footsteps. They were pounding on the pavement. People were rushing for their lives, and then an eerie moment of silence, and the water came down.

Gasping, Dani jerked awake. She moved to the edge of the bed and dragged in some air. Deep breaths. One in. One out. In. Out. She kept going, her eyes closed, and waited for her body to remember. She was safe. She wasn’t there.

Safe.

I’m safe.

Dani could still hear the sirens in the distance, and she flinched, gritting her teeth.

“Hell.” Dani cursed, catching a glimpse of the clock. Three in the morning. She’d gotten five hours of sleep. It had been almost three months since she had a full night’s sleep.

She’d been given a card for times like this. If the nightmares kept coming, she’d need to talk. But that was the problem. Dani didn’t talk unless it was necessary, but her hand still reached for her purse and pulled out the card. The number was bold and black, emblazoned for easy reading.

“You’ve been through an awful and horrible event in your life. You’ll need help, and when you want it, it’s there, Dani.”

Fuck that. She’d get through this, like she got through everything else. Crumpling up the card, she stuffed it back in her purse. She stretched her neck, kneading the sore muscles there, and moved to the kitchen to get a bottle of water.

As she opened it and took a sip, she heard another voice in her head. This one was a dark baritone, and he’d only been trying to help her. “I’m here if you decide to stop running. I’ll always love you. You know that, but I can’t keep following you around.”

Her hand twitched now, spilling water into the sink.

Her eyes caught sight of her bare finger and she held still. She couldn’t look away. That man, that voice—he hadn’t asked for what she did to him. Shame hung her head, but then she put the water away and glanced at the clock. Mae would probably still be awake.

A drive to Mae’s Grill would help clear the nightmare from her mind.

After dressing, she headed out, but coming to the main highway, she let the car sit and idle a second. Just over the ditch, running alongside the highway was the town’s livelihood.

Falls River.

It encompassed their entire state and wound its way through the next two and into Canada. Most of the workers who settled in Craigstown worked at the dam, not far north. It kept their town with food and fuel. And life. Many nights she remembered jumping off a certain bridge, not three miles from Mae’s place.

Tenderfoot Rush was a bridge where everyone, every teen and every adult, had jumped off naked, dressed, or in swim trunks. Everyone did it. It was the favored pastime of the summer. If you couldn’t find anyone in town, and it was over 100 percent humidity, just check Tenderfoot Rush. They were always there. The place was built on memories—from everyone. And so many decided to make the trek to Mae’s Grill, just three miles south. Many tubing trips started at Tenderfoot Rush and pulled out at Mae’s Grill.

There were still a few cars in the parking lot when she got there, and she heard yelling from inside as she opened the door. “Barney, get the hell out of here before I do something I’ll regret. You hear me?!”

“Aw, come on, Mae. I don’t got nowhere to sleep tonight. Can’t drive. You made sure of that when you took my keys.”

“I don’t care. It’s not my problem. If you get annihilated and think I’ll let you drive out of here, just inviting a lawsuit against my bar—you’re a fool. You drink, that means you’re not driving, but you’re still not my problem. Now get out of here!”

“But, Mae.” He was slumped on his stool at the bar when Dani went inside. “I don’t have anyone to call.”

Mae slapped a towel on the counter. “Don’t make me call that future nephew-in-law of mine. He’ll arrest you.”

“But I don’t got no place to sleep, Mae.” He whined again, settling his forehead on the counter again. He snorted. “Yeah, you call your nephew. He’s marrying the side of family that don’t want you around.”

Barney had a death wish.

A second later his words penetrated his skull. His head jerked back up with wide eyes, and his cheeks lost color. “Oh, gosh—I didn’t mean… Mae, that didn’t come out right. I’m sorry—”

“You. Get. Out. Now.” Her hands wrapped around the towel and she was wringing it, envisioning it was his neck.

“I’s going, Mae. I didn’t mean nothing by what I’s just said. I mean it, Mae. I speak without a brain. I’m sorry, Mae.” He made a scramble for the door. He turned back and opened his mouth, but nothing came out when he saw Dani standing just inside the door.

Mae heard his pause and turned, too.

“She sure is purrty, Mae.”

Mae threw a bottle at him, which he ducked. It shattered against the wall, and Barney was out the door in a flash.

Mae’s chest was heaving. Her nostrils flared. “Every damn night it’s the same thing over and over. I’m getting tired of it. He needs help.” She began wiping the counter, her hand moving in quick, savage circles.

Dani remained in one spot. She was still so damned tired, but she was thankful her aunt wasn’t paying her much attention. She was still cursing under her breath. Dani tried to warm her hands and rubbed at her cheeks. She looked in the mirror before she left, and knew she looked like a ghost. She could still feel the nightmares. They clung to her like a wet blanket, but she needed to get rid of them. She needed to look alive when Mae really focused on her again. After hearing what Barney said, Dani was thinking she needed to be the one there for her aunt and not the other way around.

Mae was grumbling. “I should just make Jake kick him out of town. Barney don’t got no family here, and he doesn’t have a job. He’s got nothing. Jake could take him out of town in his cruiser and let him hitchhike to the next town. He’s got a soft spot for him.” She kept going. Her hand moved faster and faster.

“Mae.”

“No.” Mae shook her head. “No, girl. You sit and help yourself to some coffee. I brewed a fresh batch not long ago. It takes all my energy to argue with that damn drunk. He’s so stubborn, but no more. He always says he won’t be a problem if I let him have the bottle, but he’s always harping for a place to sleep.”

Dani poured herself a mug and sat down. She couldn’t help wondering if it was Barney who Mae was even talking about now.

“He don’t got anyone. Why’s he here?” She stopped scrubbing, brushing some of her hair off her forehead. “Yeah.” Her voice was quiet now. “He should go, but he never does. Never will.” Then it was like she remembered Dani was there. Mae blinked a few times, dropped the washcloth on the counter, and looked at her. “What are you doing here at this hour?”

Dani went for the easiest answer. “Jake stopped by earlier.”

“He did?”

“Yeah.” Dani took a sip as Mae leaned against the counter right across from her. “Julia doesn’t want me out at the house. She doesn’t even want me to see Aunt Kathryn.”

Mae pushed back up from the counter with a sharp movement. “That—!” She heaved a deep sigh to calm herself. “Can’t say I’m surprised. She’s not going to like you being home.” She eyed Dani. “She’ll be worried you’re going to take Jake away.”

Dani felt there was a little more to that statement when Mae said it, and she put her mug back on the counter. “Is she the only one thinking that?”

Mae lifted up a shoulder. “People are talking. They’re wondering.”

“People are wondering about me?” Dani leaned forward, resting her elbows on the counter. “Or are you wondering?”

Small towns meant big mouths. Dani knew that. She’d always known that, but this gossip had been fast. Then again, she ran into Kelley Lynn. Maybe she should’ve expected it after being in town only for one day.

Mae grabbed the washcloth again and began cleaning the counter where Dani sat. “I did before. I don’t anymore. You’re not the same you from before.”

“What do you mean?” She reached for her coffee, but only sat there. Her hands grew cold, even holding that hot mug.

Mae shrugged again, finishing up her cleaning. She tossed the washcloth to the back kitchen. “You’re not the same girl who left these parts ten years ago. I can see it in you, and I’m guessing that you’ve seen some of what life has to offer. I’m betting it’s not the side that goes to operas and sings church hymns. It’s big news when the middle O’Hara comes back to town after vanishing ten years ago. It’s even bigger news when she left a slip of a girl and comes back a stunning young woman. Even if others can’t tell, I can. You’ve got a backbone now. And this is the same girl who holds the title First Love on Jake’s love life, but the question isn’t how is Julia going to handle you being back.” Mae watched her steadily. “It’s you, so what are you going to do Dani? Is Jake the real reason you came back home?”

The air grew thick with tension.

Dani cut some of that tension as she said, “I didn’t come back for Jake.” That only answered part of her aunt’s question, and the other part was a question she was starting to realize maybe others had as well.

Was she going to take him back?