My True Self

Chapter 2

A few days had past. Same routine, same beatings, same bullying each and every day. I knew I only had a short time before I was free and was able to get out on my own. I didn't care at this point if I was able to finish school or not. I had the best grades in class, sure, but that didn't mean I was going to college or anything. My main focus was getting the hell out of the house with Carol and getting away from everyone and everything. I wasn't going to be pulled behind because of them.

The last school bell of the day rang and I bolted out of the classroom and headed straight for the door. Before I made it there, I was confronted by Coach. He smiled at me, as if he was happy to catch me on time.

"Gwen! You didn't make it to my office the other day when I asked you to." He said to me as he put his hands in his pockets. I shrugged and looked away from him, uncomfortable with the gesture of someone wanting to actually talk to me. I don't need another person in my life to try and pry into my business, as if they felt sorry for me, just for me to move to another foster home yet again before I turn 18.

"Sorry," I said with my head lowered. "I had to hurry home before I was late." s**t, s**t, s**t, stop talking, Gwen!

"It's okay. We can talk now! Come with me." He gestured me in the direction of his office, blocking the doorway, leaving me no choice but to follow orders. I walk slowly down the halls to the gym and PE hallways. All the jocks and preppy bitches hung out here and as I walked past, they looked and stared at me as if i was out of place, in which case, I was.

As we turned a corner, I accidently bumped into someone and fell back, yet caught my footing before falling to the ground. I looked up and saw that I had bumped into Braden. His eyes almost seemed red from anger, until he saw I was walking with Coach and bowed his head.

"Sorry, Gwen! Better watch where you're going." Braden said with clenched teeth, afraid to say anything stupid around Coach. I lowered my head again and Braden ran by before Coach said anything. Coach looked at me and smiled, as he gestured to the door of his office and opened it. I walked in and it was small, almost like a utility closet. His desk was bare except for the computer and his seat and the seat across from it that I sat down on. No pictures, no family photos, completely bare. Coach closed the door behind him and sat on his seat.

"So, Gwen," he started out, looking at his computer. "Top of the class, no friends really, and no college applications sent in."

"I've never had any friends. Easier that way. I'm just ready to get out of school and look for a life." I said, trying not to bring up more about myself that would cause suspicion to him. He looked at me, firmly.

"Gwen, I know that Braden and all his friends bully you. I know that they are part of the reason for having no friends. I also know that you have some kind of abuse going on with the foster home that you live in." He straightens out in his chair and I tense up, knowing that if he knows these things, I'm in trouble. "I'm not going to report your homing situation unless you want me to. You're almost 18. I'm sure you want out of there and as far away as possible. I didn't bring you hear to lecture you. I'm sure you've heard plenty." He paused for a minute. I look away, being stared at or conversations like that make me very uncomfortable.

"I don't want it reported. I just deal with it." I spoke quietly. I don't want to put out details and I don't want him to get anymore aware of what is going on. He clears his throat and I can hear Coach sitting back in his seat.

"Well, that is your decision. You have about 3 months left of being there before you're free. However, with Braden," I look up as he says his name. I feel a mix of feelings between anger and hurt. "He is going into a lot of trouble for harming another student. It's not your fault and it's not just you he has hurt. He may be expelled if he keeps it up, really. I'm going to be keeping a closer eye on him. If I see him try to hit or swing at you again, he's gone." I nearly cry at the thought of not having to be abused at both school and home. I've dealt with it for so long that even the thought has made me scared.

"Thank you." I said very quietly. I lowered my head again. I still feel very uncomfortable.

"Gwen, I want you to know you are safe around me. Other teachers may not put in the effort, but I will. I know you need someone. I can be if I need to." I nodded my head and looked up.

"Thanks again, Coach. I don't feel comfortable talking to anybody." He nodded as well.

"I understand," he stands from his chair and walks over to the door. "In order to change that, I guess we will start having daily meetings." He says as he opens the door and my heart sank. I've never been close to anyone and I've never been able to talk to anyone about anything. I grab my bag and walked out of the office and start heading out the door, home.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I keep having the same dream over and over again, as if I was a wolf. Only each time do I keep getting closer and closer to the other pack. This time, they finally came up to me, face to face, and I could understand what they were saying.

"You are the Alpha's daughter. A Luna!" I didn't know what any of that meant. I could never be a leader to anyone.

Finally, the leader of the pack came to me and faced me. The wolf's eyes glowed as if he'd found someone he had been searching for.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I wake up from my dream and it's still dark outside. I look at the time and see it's just past midnight. I felt the urge to go downstairs and go outside. I snuck quietly down the steps, making sure not to hit any of the creeks of the wood and not to wake up Carol or Ron. I made it through the kitchen and to the back door and tried to open it without making a sound. When I was outside, I saw that the moon was full and it shinned over the snow, making the forest behind the house look like a fairy tale. I gasped at the sight and felt free, ambitious.

I felt like running out in the snow like a dog, and I wanted to feel the cold on my skin. I felt as if I wanted to get out and be free. I took a step out onto the patio, closer and closer until I reached the steps down to the ground.

Without hesitation, I ran through the snow, bare footed. It didn't bother me and the cold didn't hurt. It felt nice and calming. I kept running, not looking back at how far I had gone from the house. I ran for about 30 minutes before I stopped to take a breath. The house wasn't even in sight anymore. I looked around and saw that I had come up to a creek, just like in my dreams. I look at my reflection and see that I am still a human. I'm not dreaming about this. I felt alive. I felt wild. I am free.

I look up from the water and am startled when I see other people standing on the other side. They all stare at me, as if they know me. I began to panic and turned to run.

"Wait!" A woman from the group called out. I froze, unsure of what to do. I turned around slowly and saw that there were 5 of them standing there; 3 men and just the 2 women. The woman who called out to me stood in front of the group. She had long black hair and a skinny, yet fit, figure. She was older than the rest, but still looked well for whatever age she might have been. She crossed the river and walked towards me slowly, trying not to alert me or make me scared. I stood there, scared.

"It's okay. Don't be afraid." She says softly. She sniffs the air around me and gasps as if she had found something out that was scary. Her eyes began to tear up and her hands began to tremble. I looked at her confused.

"Gwen... Gwenniver? Is that you?" She said to me as tears ran down her face. I could feel the color escape my body and face. I was confused and scared of the thought of someone knowing my name from a person that I had never met before.

"Do- do I know you?" I stuttered. I could then smell a very familiar scent in the air as the wind blew past. It was a calming and fragile scent that I had known and kept with me for years. The scent that brought me back to when I was younger, before the foster homes, before the loss of my life before me, the scent of my mother. I came to a sudden realization of who this might be and I can feel tears filling my eyes.

"I'm your mother." She said softly to me.