The Switch Up

9

Friday, October 28, 2016

"I think we need to talk Halloween costumes!" I say hearing Harry audibly groan and tilt his head up to the ceiling. He is back in his white button up and black slacks and honestly he can do both. He can pull off the sleek businessman and the casual I'm going to a pumpkin patch look.

"Now I was thinking about going for a group costume type thing." I start in pulling up my list of possible ideas for costumes for our big date night.

"You got Harry to dress up for Halloween?" Nadine puts her spoon down and gives me an amazed expression once I nod to confirm her question.

"Do you want to come to the haunted house with us on Halloween?" I offer to Nadine kinda hoping she says no so that I can have some more one on one time with Harry. Our first date had gone really well and I couldn't wait for this next one.

"As much as I would love to see Harry s**t his pants I can't. I have this family party I have to go to since I skipped out on the last 3." I sigh a breath of relief in my head when she politely declines my offer to tag along with Harry and I.

"Alright well if you change your mind you are welcome to join." I tell Nadine going back to my short list of ideas I had for Harry and I. "Mkay so here are your options, we could do Stranger Things and go as Elevan and Mike, Mary Poppins and the Chimney Sweeper, or and this is my personal favorite, Miley Cyrus, and Robin Thicke."

"I already agreed to go to this stupid house, why do we have to dress up?" He whines coming over and slumped in his seat like a child.

"Because that's what you do on Halloween!" I stress to him as he picks up his drink and sips it rolling his eyes playfully.

"If you don't tell me what you prefer then I'm going to just pick." I taunt him hearing him let out a long groan. "Boy if you don't stop groaning at me!"

"Fine whatever you want I don't care." He shakes his head and I smile already knowing what I wanted. I was going to go with Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke since Harry wanted to be as normal as possible, I thought I would take it easier on him.

"Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke it is! Do you want to go shopping after work? Maybe after grab something to eat?" I offer wanting to spend more time with Harry before Halloween. I thought we could make this a cute little mini date.

"Sounds good to me." He says through a mouthful of grilled cheese that is stretchy like the pizza on Ninja Turtles.

+

"We need to find you a black and white suit which shouldn't be too hard." I cycled through a bunch of suit coats but wasn't finding quite what I was looking for. "We're going for a dressy referee vibe."

"What about your costume? I doubt you are going to find a mouse looking leotard." Harry points out looking through a rack not too far from me.

"I'm a crafty b***h so I'll probably make mine," I answer still trying to search this place until I found what I was looking for. I was determined to find Harry a black and white striped suit so he could be Robin Thicke for Halloween.

After stripping the entire men's department of their suits I sat my hands on my hips and huffed. There wasn't anything close to what I was looking for and it was bumping me out, to say the least.

"Aw well, I guess we can't dress up, oh well! Let's go get something to eat." Harry shrugged wanting to give up way too easily.

And then I saw it! An old man with gray hairs on top of his head strolling with a black and white stripped suit. He looked about 60 years old with his wrinkled face and neck. There was our Robin Thicke!

"Harry!" I pull on Harry's arm to get him to see what I am seeing and before I can go any further Harry shakes his head and gives me a look.

"No! Not happening!"

"Come on Harry!" I plead bringing my palms together and give him begging eyes.

"Madeline no we are not just going to take that man's clothes!" Harry folded his arms and told me to forget about the entire idea. This proved to be a whole lot harder however since the man was just standing a few feet away from us checking out different clothing racks.

Glancing over at the costume section that was just another few steps away my eyes caught a Target worker outfit. The wheels turned in my head and before I did anything else I looked at Harry.

"How about you go grab some snacks and I'll meet you over there."

"What are you doing?" He asks and I come up with a quick little lie.

"I'm going to grab a few things for my costume and I will meet up with you." I push Harry along until he is finally out of sight. Harry was going to be on the other side of the store where all the groceries were which was perfect since this needed to go as smooth as possible.

I snatch the Target costume and head to the nearest dressing room which just so happened to be in the men's area. Running into an open room I throw off my clothes and squeeze into the tight Target employee uniform. I check myself out for a few seconds then scammer out of there to find the old man in the same place. I walk over to him casually with a smile and begin to try and assist him.

"Hello, Sir! Is there anything I can help you find today?" I put on a bright smile checking out his suit up and down. It was perfect!

"Just looking deary." He responds in a whistle toned voice that reminds me a bit of a cartoon. I need to step up my game.

"You know, I think this would look absolutely fabulous on you. Do you have any upcoming events?" I pull a Hawaiian flower shirt from the rack to see him inspect. He rubs the fabric together and after much inspection takes it from my hand.

"I actually have a date with my wife tomorrow night." He tells me bringing the shirt up to his body to get a basic fit.

"Why don't we get a dressing room for you, here I'll get a couple different sizes for you." I pick up the same shirt but different sizes and walk him to the dressing rooms I had just come from. Everything was going according to plan.

"Right in here." I guide him to an open stall and see his grateful smile show itself. "Here, Why don't I take that coat for you." I insist.

"Thank you so much dear!" He says to me handing me the jacket I needed, the only thing I needed was the pants and then I would be out of here. I throw his jacket into my stall that is right next to his and wait next to the door.

"How is everything fitting?" I ask him doing my best to come up with how to grab his pants.

"Wonderfully but hey would you mind finding me a nice pair of slacks? I don't think the ones I have on are meshing well." And then a lightbulb goes off in my head. The old man had glasses, if when he opened the door for me to hand him his pants... If I could knock his glasses off for a few seconds that could give me the time I needed to swipe the pants from him.

What kind of human being am I really? I swear I am going to hell for this!

"Yes, of course, I will be right back," I tell him and rush to find any pair of pants since I wanted to finish out this plan. I only had one shot at this and it had to go smoothly or else it would be in ruins and I would be sitting here looking like some i***t.

I come back to the dressing room with a pair of blue jeans that I didn't even check the sizing of. Knocking on the door I see the knob turn and take a deep breath before seeing the grandpa open up the door to reveal his Hawiann floral shirt and his plaid boxers I wish I could unsee.

Going to hand him the pants my hand brushes against his face and his glasses fall off just like I had planned them. In this moment as I scatter to take his pants, I feel like such a terrible human being. I was going to need to pray extra for this one.

"I'm so sorry Sir!" I apologize before going into my dressing room to grab my bag and clothing along with the jacket I had stolen from the old man. I stuff everything into my purse and casually make my way to the exit where I catch my eyes with Harry who is already checking out.

I realize that not only have I stolen an old man's clothing but I had also stolen a Target uniform costume! Honestly... I swear my mother raised me better.

Once I make an exit I sprint to Harry's car only to hear him shout my name from behind. "Madeline!"

He beats me to the car and I lean up against it not wanting to face him after he learns that I stole from an old man.

"Why are you wearing a Target uniform?" He automatically asks once he gets close enough to see that I had a completely different outfit on.

"Let's get in the car and I will explain," I tell him clutching my bulging bag over my shoulder. "Come on!" I hurry Harry who unlocks the car and starts it up as soon as we are both securely inside.

"Why are you in such a hurry to get out of here?" Harry glances over at me as we get back on the road. I fiddle with my hands for a moment before beginning my bag up to my lap.

"Look I know you told me not to but..." I pull out the black and white striped suit from my bag with a hesitant smile. I see his face change from worried to shocked. He probably didn't think I would do it.

"Madeline, what the hell? Did you steal that poor old man's clothes?" Harry's jaw drops with his eyes momentarily tracing over the Robin Thicke looking suit.

"Harry it looks like the exact same suit Robin Thicke wore on stage!" I enthusiastically say to Harry even though I already know that what I did was not okay on any scale. Sometimes I wonder if I have a conscience!

"Dear god Madeline! How did you- you know what, I don't want to know." Harry keeps looking at me while I sink into my seat. Glancing over at me every 5 seconds he shakes his head and sighs.

"What?"

"You are some girl Madeline Vega!" I see a smile sneak onto his face just as the street lights stream into the car and light up Harry's face.

"Yep, that's me." I smile back looking down at my fake Target uniform that I had stolen for the sake of stealing another man's clothes. Sometimes I worry about myself.