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The Switch Up

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Blurb

"You two are both acting like babies, I hate not knowing who to blame, I am super horny! I mean really horny and all I want is some sweet and sour chicken with some chow mein!" I screamed at the two men who stood across from me pointlessly fighting with each other.

"I mean, baby you know I would love to go down on you but like... I feel like it would be really weird if the first thing the baby saw was my dick."

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1
Present Day "Why would someone ever do this to another human being?!" I screamed out in agony as I gripped the scratchy sheets of the hospital bed. My sweat is feeling more like a waterfall down my face kinda like in a comedy movie where water profusely pours down a character's face when they are nervous. "I've changed my mind I want the epidural! It's like a ring of fire down there!" I tensed up and curled my toes feeling the intense contraction spike up on the monitor. I screamed out as the doctor pressured me to push with all I had which wasn't much since I hadn't been able to sleep for a total of about 7 months during the pregnancy. "Just try to stay calm!" I whipped my head around to see a very worried Harry just a few inches away from the bed. Reaching my arm out I snatched the collar of his shirt and pulled him close to my face. "Stay calm?" I grit my teeth at him and look deeply into his eyes with a look that could kill of looks could actually do that. I burned my eyes into his green ones and speak again, "You are telling me, me the women pushing out another human being out of her v****a without ANY medication to stay calm?!" "Babe I'm just trying to help you-" Harry shook with scared green eyes and quivering hands that didn't cease to stop shaking even after I let him go. "My v****a is on fire!" I screech letting go of Harry's collar slapping my hands back down to the sheets that I could rip off right about now. "Give her the damn epidural!" Harry argued with the doctor that was heavily concentrating on my v****a. I could see the visible sweat begin to pour down Harry's facial features and in some ways, he looked more terrified than I was. "An epidural won't do anything at this time, it is too late for that now." A nurse with a mask over her mouth enlightened Harry who ran fingers through his hair, something he always did when he was stressed out. "I'm heeee- Oh my god!" I heard a shriek at the door, my head nearly twists to see a very late Zayn standing to let the door hit him as it closes behind him. His beard his unkempt and his heart is racing from the way his expression on his face is revealing under the super unflattering light. His hair is disheveled and his muscle tee wrinkled, everything about him resembles panic. "What the hell is that-" Zayn shuffled to get to his pocket and began pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a white lighter. "Sir there is no smoking in here we are going to have to ask you to leave!" One of the two nurses speed walked over to Zayn and began to open the door for him to exit. "Damn it Zayn don't you know white lighters are bad luck?!" I cried out at him with wide eyes. My face rose with a red tint as soon as I feel a wave of heat washing over me. To confirm my suspicions I look over at the monitor to see the contraction coming on quickly. "Holy s**t!" I swear as I begin to push as soon as the contraction comes on and the doctor cues me to start pushing once again. I jolt up and curl my toes again trying to remember I needed to breathe since my birth coach had told me I needed to work on that. "I am the father of that baby she is pushing out right there! You can't just kick me out!" Zayn argued something that I had been hearing him do for months now. "Let him stay." I squeal out to the nurse who nods and goes back to assisting the other nurse and doctor. "I want it out! Get it out!" I hammer my fist on the bed and shake my head furiously. "Oh my god I never wanted to see-" Zayn cuts himself off in the middle of all this chaos and drops to the floor next to the door. "Is he okay?!" I am talking in a heightened voice but only because I feel like I am being ripped apart down there. "He will be fine, this can all be a little overwhelming for soon to be Dads." The doctor rubbed my leg with her latex glove. "¡mi amor!" Another voice barged in as I turned my attention once again to my mother stumbling into the room. The door swings open and slams into Zayn's head causing him to shoot up from the floor. "Why are there so many people in here? I feel suffocated!" I grumbled rubbing my stomach and grabbed Harry's hand to squeeze since I saw another contraction coming on. "I need a longer break I'm not ready yet! I'm not ready yet!" I plead feeling another jolt of pain surge through my body. "Everything is going to be okay baby! Just push!" My mother runs with her heels clicking against the white tile floor. She peers down under the cloth where the doctor sits waiting to deliver my baby. "Momma! Stop looking down there I am self-conscious... I didn't even get to shave down there!" I yelled causing my mother to grab my hand on the other side of the bed. With Harry holding my right hand and my mother holding my left I screamed tiring my lungs with all the yelling. "Oh s**t, I think I just... shit." Yanking my hands from both Harry and my mother I slapped them over my face feeling justifiable in my embarrassment. "I promise I will clean that up I am so sorry I-" "It happens to the best of us sweetie, just try to relax okay. The baby is starting to crown." The doctor informed me as I looked over at Zayn who was shaking in the corner of the room. "Would you stop being such a p***y and get your ass up? God, you act like you are the one having this baby!" I screamed in Zayn's direction watching his face pale as soon as he stumbled to get up. "p***y ass b***h!" I screamed at the contraction jerking up again and blowing out all the air I had left inside of my oxygen deprived lungs. In that same moment of complete chaos, I felt the tightness and pressure dissipate within seconds. Let's pause the tape shall we since you're most likely very very confused about what is going. So I'm going to pause right here and take you back and show you how I ended up here in all this chaos. N. Hey friends I am back and am really excited about this story! It's going to be crazy as you can see from the first chapter, so I hope you all stick around! Blow up my comments with your thoughts!

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