Awakening

Chapter 1 Jonathan Carver was on his hands and knees in his loft over the classroom of the grammar school. His knees, forearms, and forehead were pressed into the cornhusk mattress of his bed. He could feel Nathaniel’s tumescence within him. Nathaniel’s sweat dripped on his back while his lover’s rough, work hardened hands rubbed his hips. As he rhythmically pumped his body against him, Jonathan could feel Nathaniel’s testicles slapping against his legs, his coarse pubic hair prickling his smooth buttocks with every stroke. Nathaniel’s ragged breaths whispering in Jonathan’s ears were punctuated with low moans and the invoking of God’s name along with Jonathan’s. Jonathan was past the pain of penetration that, at first, had seared through his body as he lost his virginity to Nathaniel’s initial powerful thrusts. The physical sensations he was now experiencing were not pleasurable by any means. The feeling of fullness and a need to evacuate caused him much discomfort. But, the overwhelming emotional satisfaction of being in union with another man far outweighed any perceived unpleasantness. With his eyes closed, he allowed himself to be mesmerized by the moment, pushing down the voices that cried for his eternal damnation for engaging in such debauchery. “Jonathan, I am going to finish!” Nathaniel’s voice was strained as he thrust himself tightly against Jonathan’s buttocks and stopped all movement. Jonathan could feel the bigger man holding his breath and then, accompanied by a moan, he could sense the pulsating of Nathaniel’s p***s deep inside his bowel. A renewed, but irregular stroking followed. At the conclusion of each thrust, Jonathan could feel the pulsations of the organ trapped in the confines of his body, feel Nathaniel shudder, hear him moan in pleasure. The undulations slowed and finally ceased. With a groan and great rush of breath, Nathaniel collapsed on the kneeling man, causing him to crumple to the mattress. Jonathan felt the heaving of Nathaniel’s chest, the pounding of his heart against his back, and the slow softening of his member. He dreaded the moment when it would be withdrawn. Their union, despite the discomfort it had caused him, was the most thrilling experience Jonathan Carver had ever had in all his twenty years of life. It was the culmination of a search that had gone on since puberty, though until recently, he had had no idea of what he was searching for, or that he was even searching at all, only that there was a sense of something important missing in his life. Now that missing piece had been discovered. Nathaniel pressed his face into the nape of Jonathan’s neck, nuzzling his long, damp, blond hair. He slid his hands along Jonathan’s arms until, reaching the backs of his hands; Nathaniel entwined his fingers with Jonathan’s. Jonathan contracted his gluteus muscles, causing the man on his back to sigh. As Nathaniel’s heart rate and breathing became regular, his p***s slipped from its resting place. He rolled off Jonathan and lay on his back beside him. Jonathan turned on his side, leaning his head on his hand, gazing at the man with whom he had just had intercourse. He marveled at the handsome face, the deep muscular chest covered with soft, dark hair. He reached out and ran his fingers through that hair with his free hand. Nathaniel was gently stroking his semi-erect p***s with his left hand. His right was lying on his forehead, palm up. His eyes were closed. He was smiling. Nathaniel opened his eyes. His smile deepened as he looked up into the blue eyes staring down into his. “Did I hurt you?” he asked, reaching up with his right hand to stroke Jonathan’s smooth cheek, while his left continued its stroking. “A bit,” Jonathan lied, not wanting to shatter the blissful moment with the confession that the pain, at the moment of penetration, had been excruciating. “Good, as hurting you is not at all what I intend. My first time was very painful.” “You have done this before, then?” Jonathan had assumed so, as Nathaniel seemed to know what he was doing. “Aye, ‘twas many years ago when I came here on a merchant ship to fulfill my indenture to Mr. Adams.” Jonathan continued to softly stroke Nathaniel’s body from shoulder to abdomen, as he listened to the deep voice recount the tale of his first s****l encounters. “I sailed on the Lady Julian from Portsmouth. We were barely a day out of port when a man approached me. His name was Dequian. He told me he was from an island in the seas south of the New World—a place called Jamaica. He was swarthy, his head was shaved and he wore rings in his ears. The man was difficult to understand, as he had a strong, unfamiliar manner of speaking. Dequian wore an open sleeveless, leather vest with no shirt beneath. It was the closest I had ever been to a nearly naked man and it made my blood race. The next few days, as soon as Dequian’s watch was done, he would find me. We would stand at the rail and talk. One evening he lured me into one of the holds. There he shared his daily ration of rum with me. It was there that he seduced me.” Jonathan gasped. “Oh, it was not anything I had not desired,” Nathaniel continued, “I had known of my attraction to men for as long as I can remember. He could have saved his rum. I was more than willing to cooperate. Over the course of the voyage we were together almost every night.” “Where is he now?” asked Jonathan. “I do not know. When we reached Newburyport he sailed away within a week and I never saw him again. That was thirteen years ago. Until tonight I have not had my need for a man satisfied.” Nathaniel smiled, leaned forward, and kissed Jonathan tenderly. He looked down at Jonathan’s fully erect p***s and said, “Now you have a need that is not sated. Let me help you.” Jonathan blushed slightly, but allowed Nathaniel to slip his left arm around his shoulders, pulling him close as he took Jonathan’s turgid member in his right hand, stroking it gently. Nathaniel began to kiss him. Each kiss became more passionate, inviting more and more contact with his tongue as well as lips. Slippery fluids flowed from Jonathan’s p***s as the foreskin was moved forward and back along the glans. He shuddered. “This is good for you?” Nathaniel queried. “Oh yes, yes, Nathaniel, very good.” “At some time I would dearly love to have your organ within me as I was within you. Would you like that?” These words of Nathaniel’s were breathed into Jonathan’s mouth. Jonathan had a vision of that moment and it pushed him to the brink of orgasm. With another series of shudders, Jonathan moaned a “Yes” in response and felt the pressure building in his groin. He braced himself against his partner. With a snort through his nostrils he released his seed onto his abdomen and Nathaniel’s hand. When the eruptions subsided, Nathaniel raised his hand to his nose and inhaled deeply. “Nectar,” he whispered and then licked the semen from his hand. Nathaniel regarded his own p***s. “I am ready again,” he said simply. Using the remaining issue from Jonathan’s ejaculation, he began to stroke himself. Jonathan leaned into his body and began to fondle Nathaniel’s n****e, which responded to the stimulation by becoming hard and erect, sending shivers down Jonathan’s spine. In a short time, Nathaniel had ejaculated for a second time, allowing his seed to land on Jonathan’s stomach, where Jonathan’s semen lay. Nathaniel proceeded to stir the two together and then fed the mixture to Jonathan, who quickly overcame his initial hesitancy and ingested the proffered treat with relish. The two men lay back on the crude mattress and exchanged caresses. After a time Jonathan sat up and regarded Nathaniel’s p***s. He had never seen an adult male p***s before; he had only observed his brothers’ when they were boys. Theirs had both been similar to Jonathan’s. Nathaniel’s was different. Gone was the hood covering the glans. “Why is it that your member is so different from mine? Have you had an accident?” “I have been circumcised,” was the response. “Are you a Jew? I have read in scripture that Jews must be circumcised.” “Yes. Is that a problem for you?” “No. But, you attend Sabbath service?” Nathaniel smiled. “When Mr. Adams brought me here as his indentured servant, I had to agree to become a Christian. He changed my name from Nathan Morganstern to Nathaniel Morgan. He had me to attend church and be instructed by The Reverend Matheson. I was baptized. But, the one thing he could not Christianize was this.” He punctuated his story by taking his member in hand and giving it an affectionate squeeze. Jonathan reached out and caressed it as well. “Is it hard for you to believe all the church teaches, as you were once a Jew?” “I am still a Jew. I only did those things as Mr. Adams commanded them of me. Being an indenture, I had no choice. As for believing, well, who could believe in a God that seems to want to destroy you at every turn, a God that takes away all the joy in life, a God that condemns you to hell because your desire is for the love of a man not a woman? Can you say you believe in this God?” Jonathan closed his eyes. The thoughts and fears he had successfully repressed were now clamoring to be heard. The passion that had erupted in his soul at the moment when he realized his search for his identity had led him to this man and this act, had held them at bay. He did not want to listen to them. Not here, not now. With great resolve, he forced them into the quiet corner of his mind, where they were forbidden for the present to come forth. “I don’t know what I believe tonight. I thought I knew of my beliefs, but I also knew something burned within me that had never been recognized. Not until this evening when you offered to show me the way. Now that I am aware of the awakening of this aspect of my life within me, I am frightened by my beliefs.” “Let us not dwell on them then. Let us take this moment and live it to the fullest. We have both been searching and now our search has culminated in our union. Let us dwell on that.” Nathaniel gently took Jonathan into his arms, kissed him and lay down beside him. After a time their breathing became deep and regular. They slept. * * * * Jonathan was wakened by a gentle shaking. “I best take my leave,” Nathaniel said. “It would not do for me to be caught coming out of the school in the night. I would be fined for being out on Sabbath eve.” “More than fined, I fear.” Jonathan did not want to think of the consequence of being caught in a situation such as theirs. Nathaniel stood and stretched. Jonathan gazed at the muscular body of a man used to hard physical work. His desire was to pull the man back to their bed and begin the night anew. However, he allowed Nathaniel to pull him to his feet and embrace him. With their naked bodies pressed against each other, taking leave was hard to contemplate. “I wish you could stay.” “I wish that, too. But…” “Will you be coming to church?” Nathaniel laughed. “Oh, yes. I cannot afford to be fined for not being there.” Jonathan pulled on his breeches and put on his robe as Nathaniel dressed. They climbed down the ladder from the loft. Jonathan led Nathaniel through the darkened building to the back entrance of the school. It would be less likely that he be seen leaving by that route. At the door they embraced. “Till the morrow,” Nathaniel murmured and kissed Jonathan. He slipped out the door and Jonathan watched him as he disappeared into the shadows. When he could no longer see him, he closed and latched the door and made his way back to the loft. Removing all his clothing, he briefly considered getting into his nightshirt. He chose instead to remain naked in bed, thus breaking another of the laws of the Puritan faith. He blew out the candle that had illuminated the men as they had made love on the rough bed. Lying on top of the covers, he ran his hands over the smooth skin of his body. He was hairless except for a thick patch of blond pubic hair. Reliving the moments he had experienced, it was not long before he would accomplish his goal. He cradled his testicles with one hand and with the other brought about his second ejaculation of the night, imitating the motions Nathaniel had used. Raising his hand to his mouth, he tasted again the issue of his body. Was he going to burn in hell for this? Just then he didn’t want to consider it. All he wanted was to dream of the next time he could be with Nathaniel.