Needed By Him

Chapter 7

Days passed, and the laughter and joy from that day at the restaurant seemed to spark a change in the estate.

Through it all, the real Qin Ruo lingered at the fringes, her presence little more than a shadow cast by the imposter's brightness.

She stood, unseen and unheard, as her family—her father and brothers—shifted their affections to the stranger wearing her face.

With each laugh, each smile exchanged, something deep inside her twisted, sharp and bitter. It was as though her very existence was being erased, inch by inch.

She wasn’t just forgotten—she was forsaken, traded for a version of herself she could never be. And the worst part? They seemed happier now.

Qin Ruo's father and brothers, who had once been distant, now made regular visits to her courtyard. It began with her father bringing small gifts—delicate jade ornaments, hand-painted fans, and even a rare book or two.

Each time, he sat with her longer than the time before, watching as she admired his presents with a wide smile, her delight as infectious as her curiosity.

Qu Zheng, her eldest brother, initially stiff and formal, grew warmer with each visit. At first, he simply observed, offering polite conversation as she asked questions about his work and the world beyond the estate walls.

But soon enough, he found himself joining in her laughter as they reminisced about their childhood, or as she recounted stories from the market with an animated flair that caught him off guard.

Qu Han, ever the quiet middle brother, brought small puzzles and games, something they never would have done together in the past. But now, the courtyard was filled with soft laughter and playful banter as they solved riddles and competed in chess games that stretched long into the afternoon.

Even Qu Ming, the youngest and most mischievous, came to play more frequently. He would sneak in when he thought no one was looking, dragging her outside to race among the flowerbeds or challenge her to see who could climb the tallest tree without being caught. And though their antics often drew raised brows from the servants, no one could deny how alive the estate felt with their shared energy.

Through it all, the real Qin Ruo lingered at the fringes, her presence little more than a shadow cast by the imposter's brightness.

She stood, unseen and unheard, as her family—her father and brothers—shifted their affections to the stranger wearing her face. With each laugh, each smile exchanged, something deep inside her twisted, sharp and bitter.

It was as though her very existence was being erased, inch by inch. She wasn’t just forgotten—she was forsaken, traded for a version of herself she could never be. And the worst part? They seemed happier now.

Their laughter, the warmth of their interactions—it was all so familiar, yet so foreign. She had never shared in these moments, never felt this closeness. The weight of her isolation grew heavier with each passing day.

As the weeks passed, the fake Qin Ruo's world, once limited to the confines of the estate, began to feel small again. Despite the newfound attention from her family, her gaze often drifted toward the gate, her thoughts consumed by the memory of the marketplace beyond.

Finally, one evening, as the sun set and the last of her brothers left the courtyard, she turned to Li Lei with a quiet determination. “I’ve spent long enough within these walls,” she murmured, her eyes gleaming with that familiar spark of curiosity. “It’s time to see more. To experience more. I want to go outside.”

Li Lei stiffened at once, her expression one of mild panic. “My lady, that is impossible! A woman of the boudoir cannot—”

“Why not?” The fake Qin Ruo interrupted with a playful smile. “Surely it will do no harm if we slip out for just a moment. I feel there is something waiting for me beyond the estate. I must see it.”

Li Lei blinked, her unease growing. “But, my lady, it is forbidden. We must adhere to custom. If anyone were to see—”

Qin Ruo’s eyes sparkled with mischief as she stepped closer, her voice dropping to a coaxing murmur. “No one will see. It will be our secret.” Her tone turned soft, almost pleading. “Come now, Li Lei. You have served me faithfully for so long. Do this one thing for me.”

Li Lei hesitated, caught between her duty and her lady’s charm. She cast a furtive glance around, as if the quiet garden itself could betray them. “But... the risks, my lady. Your father—”

“He will not know.” The fake Qin Ruo’s voice held a lightness that disarmed all caution. “Besides, I feel so much better today. Surely you can see that? The air outside will do me good.”

Li Lei’s resistance faltered, her brows knitting together in concern, but her loyalty swayed her. “Very well, my lady. But how will we go unnoticed?”

Qin Ruo’s smile brightened as she clapped her hands in delight. “Simple! We shall go in disguise—as men.”

From a distance, the real Qin Ruo watched in silence, her form faint, barely a whisper in the sunlight. She drifted behind them, her presence thin as mist, her expression unreadable.

A disguise? How childish. Her thoughts, cold and measured, cut through the scene like a sharp breeze. The imposter’s excitement over such a foolish scheme seemed almost laughable. How could she believe that wrapping herself in men’s clothing would fool anyone?

But there was no disdain in the real Qin Ruo’s thoughts—only a quiet, aching emptiness. Her gaze, detached and distant, moved over the imposter and Li Lei as they whispered plans to escape unnoticed.

Li Lei hurried inside to fetch the clothes. The fake Qin Ruo, left alone, twirled lightly in place, as if imagining herself already outside the estate, free and full of life. Her joy was almost childlike, her movements unrestrained.

The real Qin Ruo hovered nearby, her fingers twitching in the air as if to grasp something long lost. How strange, she thought. How easily she fills my place.

There was no bitterness in the thought, only the deep, cold weight of resignation. She had once stood where the imposter now stood, confined within the same walls, bound by the same rules. But the real Qin Ruo had never imagined breaking free, had never even considered it. She had lived quietly, as was expected—cold, distant, obedient.

When Li Lei returned with the garments, the fake Qin Ruo laughed in delight, pulling the oversized male robes over her silk gown.

She adjusted the loose sleeves and oversized collar, her reflection in the mirror an awkward blend of masculine and feminine, but her smile was bright with amusement.

“How do I look, Li Lei?” she asked, a teasing note in her voice.

Li Lei bit her lip, holding back a smile. “You look... different, my lady. But this disguise...” She hesitated, her gaze flicking over the fake Qin Ruo’s delicate features. “It may not be enough.”

The fake Qin Ruo waved her hand dismissively. “It will be fine! No one will suspect a thing.” Her tone was breezy, confident, as she tied the hat under her chin. “Besides, who will bother to look at us if we act the part?”

The real Qin Ruo observed silently, her expression still and unreadable. A child’s game, she thought. The disguise was laughable, a mere pretense. Anyone with half an eye would see through it instantly. But there was no point in intervening. No one could hear her. No one even knew she existed anymore.

Li Lei, despite her reservations, followed her lady’s lead and donned the plain robes of a male attendant. “Very well, my lady,” she murmured, bowing her head. “But we must move quickly. If anyone notices your absence—”

“They will not,” the fake Qin Ruo said cheerfully, her face aglow with excitement. “Come, Li Lei! Let’s not waste time.”

With that, the two women—now disguised as men—hurried toward the side gate.

The real Qin Ruo followed at a distance, each step heavier than the last. With every breath the imposter took, with every burst of laughter that lit her face, Qin Ruo felt herself unraveling, like a thread slowly pulled from an old garment, piece by piece.

The world seemed brighter around the imposter—vivid and loud in ways it had never been for Qin Ruo herself. She had never wanted this kind of attention, but now, watching it unfold in someone else’s hands, she couldn’t help the surge of bitterness that gnawed at her core.

Why did they embrace her so easily? Was she so insignificant that her absence had become a blessing?

The world around her seemed to blur, her presence nothing more than a shadow in the fading light. She watched as they opened the gate, slipping out into the wide world beyond while slowly following them.

The streets of the ancient city unfurled before them, vibrant and alive in the warm embrace of the midday sun. The fake Qin Ruo stepped out of the estate walls with a newfound exuberance, her eyes gleaming with a mixture of curiosity and excitement. She inhaled deeply, taking in the scents of roasted meats, fragrant herbs, and the earthy smell of the marketplace that stretched ahead. Her heart raced, a sense of anticipation bubbling within her as she looked around with wide-eyed wonder.

"Li Lei, look at this!" she exclaimed, spinning slightly on her heels. Her gaze flitted over the lively scene—vendors calling out their wares, customers haggling over prices, the hum of life and energy filling the air. “It’s so much more than I imagined.”

Li Lei followed behind, her footsteps cautious but not displeased. The lady she had served for so long had always kept herself secluded, hidden away within the confines of her boudoir. Seeing her now, so full of life, made Li Lei’s heart feel lighter. Perhaps this change is exactly what she needed, she thought, a smile tugging at her lips.

"My lady, it’s good to see you like this," Li Lei said, her voice filled with genuine relief. "You’ve spent so long keeping to yourself, I was beginning to worry."

The fake Qin Ruo grinned, her excitement spilling over as she darted from one stall to the next, her fingers brushing against silks, jade trinkets, and ceramic wares. “Why stay locked inside when there’s so much to see out here? Look at all the people!” She gestured broadly to the bustling crowd, her eyes alight with joy. “It’s all so... alive.”

Indeed, the market was a symphony of activity. Vendors lined the streets, their stalls overflowing with colorful goods. Shimmering silk fabrics fluttered in the breeze, while the clinking sound of pottery being stacked echoed through the air. The scent of freshly cooked food—buns steaming in bamboo baskets, skewers sizzling over open flames—mingled with the crisp autumn air, creating a heady aroma that enticed every passerby.

The fake Qin Ruo’s laughter rang out as she watched a young boy run past, weaving between carts and barrels with ease. She turned to Li Lei, her eyes sparkling. "Let’s explore more. Take me through the whole market."

Li Lei hesitated for a moment, glancing at the crowd. “My lady, you haven’t been outside for quite some time. Are you sure you want to stay here?”

But the fake Qin Ruo waved her off, her grin never faltering. "Of course! I’m not tired at all. Besides, when else will I get to see all this?" She pulled the brim of her hat lower over her face, her male disguise convincing enough to let her blend in, though to the real Qin Ruo, trailing silently behind, the effort seemed almost laughably juvenile.

The real Qin Ruo’s cold gaze lingered on the fake, her lips pressed into a thin line. How childish, she thought. Does she truly believe a simple hat can hide her identity?

But no one seemed to care. To Li Lei, the cheerful excitement of her lady was a welcome change. It was as if the burden of solitude that had once weighed so heavily on the real Qin Ruo had been lifted. This lively version of her didn’t arouse suspicion—if anything, it brought comfort.

The fake Qin Ruo suddenly stopped, her eyes catching sight of a large restaurant with red lanterns swaying in the breeze at its entrance. The scent of roasted duck and savory soups wafted from within, making her mouth water. “Let’s eat there!” she declared, her voice bright with enthusiasm as she pointed toward the establishment.

Li Lei’s expression flickered with concern. "My lady, this restaurant looks rather expensive. Perhaps we should find somewhere simpler?"

But the fake Qin Ruo, unperturbed, patted the pouch at her side. “It’s fine, Li Lei. I’ve brought money with me.” Her grin widened, excitement dancing in her eyes. “Come on, let’s have a feast. It’s not like we do this every day!”

Li Lei blinked in surprise, but before she could ask where her lady had obtained such funds, the fake Qin Ruo had already pulled her toward the entrance, her energy infectious.

They stepped inside the grand restaurant, where the chatter of patrons mingled with the clatter of plates and the sizzle of food being cooked in the kitchen. Servers in flowing robes moved gracefully between tables, balancing trays laden with steaming dishes. The fake Qin Ruo’s eyes lit up as she took in the scene.

Without a second thought, she began ordering from the menu with abandon. “We’ll have the roast duck, the pork dumplings, and those buns, and... oh! Definitely the pickled vegetables too!” Her voice was filled with excitement as dish after dish was added to the order.

“My lady,” Li Lei began, her voice laced with hesitation as the servers continued to bring food to their table. “This is far too much for just the two of us. Surely we don’t need all this.”

The fake Qin Ruo only laughed, waving off her concerns. “It’s fine, Li Lei. It’s my money, after all.” She gestured toward the growing pile of dishes with a carefree smile. “I’ve saved up for this. We should enjoy ourselves.”

The real Qin Ruo stood silently, her gaze fixed on the table before them. My savings. Her heart tightened with each lavish order. Years of careful restraint, of discipline, had gone into that small pouch of money. Now, it was being squandered before her eyes, tossed aside like it meant nothing. Her fists clenched within her sleeves, though her face remained as cold and detached as ever.

This woman is reckless, the real Qin Ruo thought, her bitterness deepening. She spends what I earned so thoughtlessly. And no one sees it. No one questions her.

Li Lei’s initial reluctance began to fade as the fake Qin Ruo’s joy became infectious. She smiled gently at her lady. "I’ve never seen you so happy, my lady. If this is what makes you feel alive, then I’m glad."

The real Qin Ruo’s fingers tightened, her knuckles white beneath her sleeves.

Every laugh from the fake sent a chill through Qin Ruo’s soul, her own fading presence becoming more like a distant memory.

The fake’s joy—so full, so real—was a slap in the face, a reminder that Qin Ruo had never been enough. How easily she had been replaced, and by someone who wore her face with more ease and more charm than she ever could.

Qin Ruo’s fingers tried to clench, but even that effort seemed impossible now. Her hands were translucent, her form barely visible against the vibrant backdrop of the restaurant.

The fake’s laughter echoed in her ears, a sound that made her feel smaller, less real. The cold emptiness inside her deepened as her soul slipped further away, unraveling at the seams. She was a wisp of air, a shadow on the walls, and soon, she would be nothing at all. No one would notice when she disappeared.