Looking for Love

2. Hudson

2

HUDSON

I couldn’t see Colton from where I’d leaned against the far kitchen counter to eat my lunch, but I could hear every word he spoke.

Mads had gone upstairs, and I’d stayed in the kitchen so I wouldn’t track sawdust through the dining room where I usually sat to eat lunch.

Only a screen door and a few feet separated me from the hot young guy Blake Harper had sent over to build our deck. Colton and I had connected from day one, getting caught up in bullshitting about the Red Sox and Pats. Like any true New Englander, we both loathed the Yankees and believed Tom Brady was the GOAT.

The day before, we’d talked stats over our lunch break, and our easy conversation swept us well past the half hour I’d allotted myself.

Something sparked inside me whenever I hung out with the younger man. He drew me in to the point that had I been in a different frame of mind, I’d have let my imagination run wild with inviting him over one weekend for a little bit of fun.

As it was, Mads and I had hit a goddamn wall a few months earlier, and all thoughts of sharing our bed had gotten shoved onto the back burner in our minds—same as our own s*x life.

Neither of us had fully gotten over the grief of losing our baby along with her ability to conceive. I doubted we ever truly would, but it was bitterness toward the catalyst of our sorrow that kept me up late at night when my wife finally slept.

She went to weekly meetings that hadn’t done much to help her depression or the hesitation to move on from our loss. The unused nursery upstairs looked the same as it had six months earlier, and the third bureau in the master bedroom still sat empty without the possibility of it ever being filled with another’s clothing.

Our passion had dried up although her tears continued to fall. She didn’t avoid my advances to be intimate but didn’t initiate or show any desire for me, which messed with my head and affected my ability to get hard.

I was tired of wading in stagnated waters, going through the motions—without living.

And Colton had zapped something awake inside of me, the desire for more, but the idea of opening myself up again, allowing another man access to my heart and body...

My stomach churned at the mere thought of giving someone that kind of power over me again.

“Why don’t you switch over to looking for relationships instead of hookups on Missing Link?”

The muffled question coming from Colton’s cell on speakerphone brought me back to the kitchen and the fact I still held my favorite sandwich in hand that I hadn’t yet taken a bite of.

Missing Link.

I’d heard about that app when it had first popped up in cyberspace a few years earlier, but by that time, Mads and I were already in a committed triad.

But his poor choices got him tossed from our home.

And we still suffered.

Although I fantasized about another man between me and my wife, I had no wish to be vulnerable.

But maybe that was what Mads needed.

Setting aside my sandwich, my appetite gone, I listened in on the rest of Colton’s conversation, taking note of the emotions he couldn’t hide from his tone. He made fun of his buddy for falling for a woman, but clear longing lay in every word he spoke.

His friend brushed aside his banter by bringing back up the poly dating app and suggesting Colton try for something more.

It sounded like Colton’s interest and heart’s desire lay in the happily-ever-after side of a triad, something I had zero interest in attempting again.

But Missing Link offered hookup profiles too.

I rubbed a palm over my whiskered jawline, considering the idea of bringing a spark back to our bed to rekindle the flame Mads and I had lost.

The saw turned on outside, and I shifted to the window above the sink to watch Colton work. Something about the kid attracted my eyes like a magnet, and I couldn’t help but check him out same as I did every chance I got.

He faced away from me, cutting a piece of white trim material. His wide shoulders filled out the navy blue shirt with Harper’s Construction logo on his back, dark, short hair peeking beneath the bottom of his old ball cap stained by sweat. He stood a good inch or two taller than me, something that usually turned me off toward men, but he’d held my full focus since starting on our deck.

There were no shifty gazes, no immaturity outside banter when we shot the s**t. He seemed…real. Genuine. Definitely a hard worker—and had the body to show for it. Twice, I’d caught him without a shirt on, and the one time he’d lifted the hem to wipe sweat off his brow while I stood beside him, I almost got caught ogling his eight-pack.

Colton pulled down the miter saw’s lever, the whirl of the blade louder for a few seconds as it sliced through the material he held. One small piece of AZEK fell to the ground, and he flicked off the power switch before lowering the headphones he always clamped around his ears when cutting.

I leaned on the sink and watched him use the finish nail g*n to hang the piece of trim before measuring for the next.

He would complete the job before the end of the day, and I was bummed to lose my favorite part of lunch break the previous two weeks.

I quickly ate half my sandwich, my mind preoccupied with the backyard and Colton’s a*s in his tan Carhart pants. How snugly they fit his backside, how they tempted me to yank them to his knees before bending him over the deck’s edge.

It had been too damn long since I’d allowed myself to let loose with a man, and my d**k woke up in total agreement as the scene played out in my head.

Colton emanated pure masculinity, but I got a sense he would take every inch of my c**k like a greedy little c**k s**t and beg me to fill his hole. I would pump him full of c*m and watch gobs of white dribble from his asshole as it winked at me.

“Fuck.” I scrubbed a hand down over my face, my entire body vibrating with need.

The saw whirred again, and I studied the ripple of muscle over Colton’s back through the sweaty shirt clinging to him. I wanted to slide my palms over his skin, knead the knots from his body, and soak in the groans of pleasure as he relaxed beneath my oiled hands.

I’d told myself I wouldn’t bother him on his final afternoon finishing up our deck, but I found myself striding out the slider before thinking it through.

He glanced up from where he tacked up the AZEK along the deck’s base. Heat flared in his eyes for the briefest of seconds before he shut it down just like every other time I made my way outside with the intention of hanging out with him for a little while.

Without doubt, Colton would have gladly jumped into our bed if given the chance.

Too bad he wanted more than one night.

“Hey, Hudson,” he said, his smile making my stomach feel like I rode a roller coaster.

I nodded, taking the stairs along the side. “Catch the game last night?” I asked, rounding the deck to get closer to him to soak in that feeling of…exuberance. Every inch of my body urged me to keep going—crowd the f**k out of him until he dropped the finish g*n and gave me what I craved.

He snorted, but his quick once-over didn’t go unnoticed by my eyes or my d**k. At least his gaze didn’t linger long enough to see my bulge buck. “That was a goddamn strike if I’ve ever seen one. Our boy deserved that shutout.”

Instead, the pitcher had gotten kicked out in the final inning because he got up in the umpire’s face. That had brought the manager from the dugout. Then half the team cleared the bench to back their boy.

“Reyes should have kept his a*s clear,” I said about the batter who got caught up in the middle and ended up with an elbow to his eye. Crossing my arms and leaning against the edge of the deck, I settled in to enjoy every second of being near Colton.

Both teams had ended up on the field, fists has flown, and the rumors on sports radio that morning promised lawsuits would fly too.

Colton and I went back and forth, sharing what we’d heard and who we thought might end up suspended for the rest of the season.

Same as every time I lingered and kept Colton from getting his job done, I didn’t feel a bit of remorse. Over the two-week period, I’d probably used up almost a good six hours that he should have spent working.

But he’d given me something to look forward to every day, and I couldn’t f*****g leave him alone. He was like a damned patch of poison ivy you couldn’t help but scratch until it took over your whole damn body.

“Still planning to finish up today?” I asked as he straightened from where he’d leaned alongside me.

“Yep. Gonna miss your wife’s baking, that’s for damned sure.”

I’d seen him checking out Mads plenty of times—he would be missing more than her kitchen skills.

“You’re welcome to place an order and stop by anytime.” I might have added a hint of suggestion to my voice even though I knew he wanted more than a one-and-done f**k. I should have thought to offer before he decided to go looking for love like I’d overheard earlier.

“She ought to open her own shop,” Colton said, not for the first time while turning to measure for the next piece of trim to be hung.

God, what a view he offered my hungry eyes.

I drooled over his round backside and had to swallow the rush of saliva. “It’s a hobby, one she’s not interested in building into a business,” I reminded him, my gaze flitting away from his a*s as he headed toward the saw once more.

“Damn shame. That woman makes my mouth water every morning and afternoon.” His voice held the same hint mine had.

I kept my silence for a few minutes, simply watching him work and soaking in the show of youth and virility he exuded. To have that type of man in our bed, someone closer in age to Mads than me, would stir up a s**t load of l**t, I didn’t doubt. f**k knew being a few feet from him made me crave things I hadn’t taken pleasure from in months.

No.

I only needed a flash of memory to knife my chest and lock my daydreams up. “Well, I guess I should get back to work too and leave you alone,” I said as Colton set a piece of AZEK on the miter saw.

He turned, thrusting out his hand. “It’s been great getting to know you, Hudson. Fingers crossed the Sox kick a*s tonight, and I hope the two of you enjoy your new deck too.”

I clasped his palm, heat and electrical pulses jetting straight to my hard c**k, same as when I’d greeted him on day one of the job.

Neither of us squeezed to show dominance, nor did we pull away. We hadn’t touched since he’d introduced himself a couple of weeks earlier, and that instant l**t I’d felt had only grown stronger at having spent a little time with him.

“I appreciate the extra hours you worked to make up for all those I stole from you,” I said, studying the slight swell of his pupils while wondering if he would put up a fight or submit to my leading in the bedroom.

His slow smirk revealed a dimple that would have gotten Mads’s blood pulsing through her body months earlier. f*****g shame the boy wasn’t looking to hook up anymore. He’d have given us both a night to remember.

“My pleasure,” he murmured with a definite hint of interest.

Fuck.

“I’ve enjoyed hanging out and shooting the s**t with you. You’re a good man, Hudson.”

I released his hand as the desire to yank him against me and claim his lips rolled over me. Clearing my throat and stepping back, I nodded. “Hope to see you around, Colton.”

“You too,” he said, and I forced myself to turn away before I said something stupid. Like invited him to stick around for a beer after work and maybe find out what my wife enjoyed in the bedroom.

My backside burned as though he stared at my a*s, my balls tightening against my body. I needed release, and the thought of my hand didn’t appeal. I wanted warmth and wetness wrapped around my length.

The saw sounded behind me as I bagged up the other half of my uneaten, semi-stale sandwich and considered my options. Quickie hand job or go upstairs to my wife who wouldn’t enjoy my d**k like she used to?

“You didn’t eat your lunch,” Mads said, coming into the kitchen and making the decision for me.

My body buzzed to the point my hands began to shake like a teenager faced with p***y for the first time. I tossed my sandwich into the fridge and turned toward my wife. She wore black stretch pants as usual—easy access to her fine a*s.

She opened a cabinet and stood on her toes to reach an upper shelf. Her shirt rode high, gifting me a flash of her pale belly and the hint of stretch marks, the constant reminder of what we’d lost. She hated them, wouldn’t allow me to touch the silvery lines on her skin I wanted to lavish with love.

I wrapped my arms around her like I’d done earlier when I’d arrived home, but this time, my hard d**k pressed against the top of her c***k. My lips found her neck, and she tilted her head, offering me access. While her body didn’t tense, Mads didn’t exactly melt into me like she used to either.

Reaching around her front, I slid my hand over her leggings, palming the heat of her core while nosing along her ear. “Can I have you, Mads?”

She shivered but didn’t moan. “Yes,” she whispered, and at least the haggard tone of her answer was laced with want for intimacy, assuring me of her love.

I dropped to my knees with thankfulness, pulling her pants and panties to the floor. “f**k, I’ve missed this a*s,” I growled and grasped her cheeks, spreading them wide. A lick up through her c***k shifted her hips back toward me, and I took another slow taste, groaning at her musky flavor on my tongue.

Dipping down, I lapped at her lower lips, not surprised to find a lack of dampness beyond her natural state. Still, she tasted sweet as honey, and I enjoyed the f**k out of eating her p***y and a*s until my d**k dripped with need.

She didn’t writhe with want. Didn’t pant or beg for my c**k like she used to.

A whisper of guilt shot through my brain at the knowledge I would take pleasure in my wife even though she wouldn’t enjoy it as deeply as I would, but I was too far gone in my l**t—and she’d given me permission to find release in her body.

Goddamn selfless woman—I’d been blessed with the most awesome wife on God’s green earth.

I worked open my jeans and palmed myself, a few slow tugs smearing pre-c*m over my length since the extra lubrication would make Mads more comfortable.

Standing, I glanced out the slider’s screen, then through the window above the sink, noting the lack of noise. No saw. No nail g*n. No extending or releasing of a measuring tape.

Had he heard my groans while I’d tongued my wife’s holes?

Was his d**k hard and leaking like mine?

“f**k,” I crowed against Mads, burying my nose in the softness of her neck and rubbing the back of my pre-c*m slickened d**k between her cheeks. “This okay, love?” I murmured, swiveling my hips, needing to hear her consent one last time to erase that thread of guilt still weaving through my head.

“Yes,” she whispered, arching her back deeper and widening her stance.

I bent my knees, which shifted my c**k lower between her thighs. “You’re such a good girl, Mads. Love you so f*****g much,” I whispered while sliding home into her tight p***y.