Heart of Darkness

7 - Court

Another couple of weeks pass by without any more incidents, which is quite surprising considering the princess’s prone to get into trouble. On second thought, I do suppose we didn’t get through completely without incidents: she did manage to get lost on the woods one day while in search of some special herbs. I was forced to go in search of her and use my powers to do so; at least my powers still allow me to do that much.

I am currently organizing my paperwork regarding the reconstruction of a certain part of the village which was destroyed in a recent rogue attack. Unfortunately, there are still many rogue armies attacking our kingdom, even though no Landlord or Duke ever takes responsibility for their actions. They are still trying their luck, I suppose.

I frown at my own thoughts. Their advances may be advantageous to them now that the barrier is vanishing. I can’t even imagine what will happen once it is completely lost. Surely, this kingdom will be doomed by then, engulphed by the dark powers of eager wizards.

What really troubles me is that I have no idea what to do to stop it.

Even if I marry Mika, and considering I won’t completely lose my powers along the way, I have no way to restore the barrier. With it gone, any powerful wizard can take the kingdom for their own, with or without Mika.

I feel a pang on my heart as I am reminded of her safety. If the barrier is gone, she is as good as doomed. I’m afraid to say, even death would be an act of mercy for her in that situation.

My thoughts are gladly pushed aside when there is a knock at my door. I slowly get up, knowing it must be Elias to call for me.

Sure enough, Elias slightly opens the door when I respond.

“My lord, everything is ready. There are already quite a few villagers waiting outside the castle”

I slightly nod and move to leave my office and head to the large room previously used for the Ball, now to function as Court room. This was entirely Elias’s idea. I personally hate having to do this. I still remember how dull it was to have to sit through it, or stand at the time, when I was acting as the King’s counselor. The king was already starting to get quite sick at the time. When he became too sick to leave his room, I ordered to cancel all Courts to the moment he would recover, for the dislike of all the people.

However, now I have no excuse to postpone it. It has been far too long since I cancelled it, either way.

I am on my way to the room, when Mika intercepts me, dressed in proper garments. It was quite hard to convince her to walk around like an actual princess, but it seems I have managed to succeed. Before, she would walk around the castle with her villager’s garments and only dress up nicely when I would tell her to. I’m glad she has changed her mind on that subject.

“Good afternoon, Lynus” She greets me. We have not seen each other today just yet. I have cancelled today’s class and she has taken the time to go to the village earlier than usual.

“Good afternoon, my princess” I greet her in return and can see her discontentment. She hates it when I treat her formally, but I find it a normal thing when we are not alone. “I was not expecting to see you back just yet. Have you eaten?”

“Yes, I have. I was actually on my way to the Court room. I suppose you are too. Could we go together?”

I gap at her for a moment, considering her words.

“You wish to attend Court?” I inquire her, actually intrigued at her suggestion.

“Of course.” She says with a smile.

“Whatever for, my princess?” I say, trying not to sound rude. I was not expecting her to wish to be present. I thought she would consider the procedure too boring. Obviously, I was mistaken. I am starting to lose count on how many times this girl has surprised me.

“Well, it is the job of a Monarch, isn’t it? I wish to learn how it is done so I can do it myself in the future”

“You will never perform it” I say and she frowns at my rude tone. I could not control my own voice. Her suggestion is simply ridiculous.

“Oh. Why not?” She looks at me, expecting a reasonable justification.

I am left at a loss of words. I understand now I have fallen into a trap. There is nothing I can say here that will not offend her. I curse myself at my poor choice of words.

“I meant… A Queen is not supposed to attend Court on her own. Such is the job of the King, as it always has been” I say and pray she does not take offense. Obviously, she is offended as her frown turns to a scowl. I have never seen her scowl before.

“So, you are saying a woman alone cannot perform Court”

“No, that is not what I meant-”

She looks at me and I swallow my words before I bury myself in the dirt any further.

“Well, it is a good thing you are here then, because I will perform Court. You will be the counselor”

I am dumbfounded as she storms ahead towards the Ball room.

How has she managed to turn the tides like this?

I cannot let her perform Court! The girl has no idea on what she is supposed to do. I rush after her to try to reason with her, but I am too late. She has already entered the room and is seated at the throne, looking high and mighty with her chin lifted up and a confident look in her eyes.

I actually take a moment to look at her figure. She looks like a Queen. A proud Queen at that. How could that fragile little farmgirl with dirty hands and clothes have turned into this proudful Queen I see before me.

I shake myself from my thoughts. She is not a Queen yet, and she is a about to commit a terrible mistake. I rush to her side.

“Mika, this is a mistake. Please allow me to take your place this once. I promise you I shall allow you to perform it when I further teach you on how to do so”

“All I have to do is listen to the villagers and advise them on how to fix their problems, right? Seems easy enough”

She is being so stubborn!

“Princess, I assure you there is much more to it than that” I try to reason.

However, as fate will have it, I am too late for the first villager is allowed inside the room. The villager, whom I know to be the blacksmith, bows to the princess in respect, not surprised at all for her presence here. Apparently, I am the only one who finds this odd.

“Good afternoon, Princess Mika” He greets her and she smiles warmly.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Desmond. How can I help you?”

I look at her slightly surprised she remembers his name. Though it is true she has been spending most of her time in the village, I didn’t actually expect her to memorize all of the villagers’ names.

Mr. Desmond smiles back at her and starts telling us what brought him here.

“I’m at loss with the soldiers, princess. I’ve been having trouble finding the materials I need to produce more swords and armory and to fix the ones which need repairing. I have tried to explain them this, but they keep complaining! They say it will be my fault if our kingdom falls”

Mika looks at him with pity in her eyes. I am sure she will provide him with anything this man requests of her, but that is not how Court is supposed to work. Quickly, I intervene.

“Why have you been having trouble finding the materials you need?” I ask of him and can see Mika glancing towards me from my peripheral vision.

“The ore I need can only be found at a mine past the woods. Recently, I have tried to reach it, but it is blocked by an army camp. They wouldn’t let me through!”

I am startled by this. An army is camped just in the outskirts of the kingdom. These are grave news.

“Did they tell you what they were doing there?” I question further.

“No! They nearly threw a spear at me, so I just ran! But I have no way to reach the mine like this! I can’t continue my work! You have to explain this to the soldiers”

“If the army moves from that place, you will be able to resume your travel to the mine, collect the ores and continue you work, right?” Mika suddenly speaks and I look at her, afraid she will do something stupid.

“Yes, I suppose. But how are you gonna make them move, princess?”

“You leave that to me” She smiles graciously. “You can explain the situation to the soldiers and tell them I will fix it. By the end of the week they will leave and your work will resume”

The blacksmith is as stunned as I am.

What has she just promised?

“T-Thank you, princess. I shall” He bows one more time and leaves from our presence.

I take my chance to turn to Mika, in order to scold her.

“Mika, you cannot just promise something you cannot keep! What will your people think when you fail to keep your promises?”

She just calmly turns to me. “Why do you say I won’t be able to keep my promise?”

I take a deep breath not to lose control on my emotions.

“Mika… We currently have no way to remove that army from there. Our own army is with lack of weapons and armory and we do not even know how many soldiers reside at the camp. We cannot just barge in to s*******r!”

She seems upset now. “I never said I would order an attack”

I look at her, now realizing she must have gone insane, but still try to dissuade myself.

“How, then, will you make an entire army move from our kingdom?” I say, trying to sound calm.

“I will simply ask them to leave”

She’s crazy. It must have been all those constant lessons. She has lost her mind.

“They are not going to leave simply because you asked them!”

“Well, you don’t know that. Not until we try”

“If we try, they will kill us!”

“Then, it is a risk we have to take. We can’t have an army we know nothing about slowly close into our kingdom without knowing their intentions”

“I am sure their intentions are clear water to everyone but you, princess. They intent to take over our kingdom, but maybe my lessons were not enough. Maybe you should go ahead and have yourself killed in order to understand I am right!” The words escape my mouth in rage before I can shut them out.

She scowls at me, obviously upset.

“If you don’t believe I can be a good Queen, then maybe you should have left me in that farm”

Maybe I should have!

But I cannot allow those particular thoughts to escape me. Partly because I know it is not entirely true. She will become a fine Queen, but she is being reckless now.

We stare at each other in anger for a moment, before I look away. It is far too late for me to control my anger.

“If you wish to be a fool and do this, go ahead. But do not expect my help when you are in trouble” And with that, I leave.

Rage boils inside me as I rush to leave the castle, bumping into Elias on my way out. I quickly indicate him to take my place at Court and then proceed to run away from the castle. I run out of the castle grounds and into the woods, not even bothering with my horse. I need to liberate this anger and frustration somehow. A good sprint is sure to calm me.

How could she be so stubborn?!

She is willing to throw her life away just to prove me wrong!

I stop my sprint to regain my breath and notice I am already about to enter the woods. It has been a long time since I had felt the need to run like this. I walk a little further into the woods and then stop to rest by a tree and gather my thoughts.

So much has changed since she has arrived the castle. I now know without a doubt I care for her despite my best efforts to keep her away from my heart, and because of that I have lost half of my powers.

Before all of these feelings assaulted me, I would not have been so upset about this matter. I would have simply f*******n her from going and found a different way to deal with the matter. But now, her simple upset expression haunts me.

If I refuse this from her, she will never forgive me. She does not seem to understand I care about her safety. I nearly laugh in spite of myself.

I care about her safety.

The simple thought of her getting hurt is unbearable. I nearly lost her during the winter when she became sick. I cannot go through that again. I would not survive it.

But then, how am I supposed to surpass this situation?

I cannot deny her what she wants, because it is too painful to have her hate me after everything we have been through, but I cannot just allow her to go and risk to lose her forever. Even if I do go with her, there is no telling what will happen.

I turn my mind inside out trying to come up with an answer, but come back empty handed.

The only thought which seems reasonable is to trust her judgment, but that would mean risking her life. I know I can’t protect her in the state I am now, and I am not sure how many soldiers there are. For all I know, if we go, we would be walking into a trap.

When I finally come back to my senses, it is nightfall. Court is sure to have finished moments ago. I take a long sigh and decide it is best if I go back and talk to her.

If she wants to talk to me.

After our discussion, I would not be surprised if she wouldn’t want to see me.

 I go back to the castle either way. First, I seek out Elias and inquire how the rest of Court went along, silently praying she didn’t make any other reckless promise. I am relieved to discover Court proceeded with no more incidents as the remaining villagers presented quite simple problems.

Elias informs me the princess has returned to her chambers right after, even adding that she looked quite upset. I note an inquiry in his voice, but hastily dismiss him before he can make me feel any more guilt than the one I feel now.

For the first time in my life, I feel completely lost with no idea as to what to do. I feel like my relationship with her has been completely sabotaged. Who knows if she will ever forgive me after our discussion today.

I find I feel far more concerned about that than anything else. What will happen if she never forgives me? How will I live with myself?

I stop in my tracks, suddenly realizing I have wobbled to her chamber’s door.

This is ridiculous. Despite everything, her safety comes first. Even if she never forgives me, at least she will be safe. I can live with that. Even if I lose everything else, at least she will be safe.

Before I can lose my confidence, I knock at her door. She doesn’t answer at first, but then, ever so shyly, opens the door.

I feel all of my resolve slip away from me like water as I look upon those brown eyes. She still looks as determined as she did back at Court.

“If you’ve come to try to dissuade me again, you’re too late. I have already sent a scout to the army camp so we can know how many men there are. I shall leave as soon as he returns”

I gulp as she talks. She is standing up right and looking at me fiercely, as if challenging me to defy her, but I have come to know her too well. Her hands are shaking ever so slightly. She is nervous. She is scared of what is to come. After all, this will be her first real act as the princess.

Why does such a fragile creature like her have to make such harsh decisions?

Suddenly, I just want to embrace her and take her away from this cruel world; give her a life where she can just be herself. But not even with all the magical powers in the world would I be able to do that.

“It seems you have everything figured out, then” I softly speak, trying not to sound harsh.

Her posture changes slightly as she glances away from me. She is insecure.

“You still disapprove”

I sigh and take a moment to pass a hand through my hair, trying to calm my raging heart.

“I simply fear for your safety, Mika”

She slightly nods, still looking away, and holding her arm as if trying to hold onto herself.

“Then come with me” She says, so softly that even I have difficulty to hear her.

“Pardon?”

“Come with me” She looks at me once again and I feel my heart stop, looking into her pleading eyes.

“You know I alone cannot be able to protect you from all evil”

Though I do wish I could.

“I know, but… Having you there…” She seems to struggle with the words. “It would mean the world to me”

I do not know how long we glance at each other allowing for her words to float in the air like music. I do not know what stops me from taking her into my arms and promising her I will never allow anyone or anything to harm her.

I lose track of time as I glance at those beautiful eyes and only come back to myself when Jenna strolls towards us with a board filled with food for the princess.

“Oh, Sir Lynus! I did not know you were here. Sorry to intrude” Jenna says as she approaches us, looking somewhat committed having interrupted our moment.

When I look back at Mika, she is once again looking away and I do note a reddish color on her cheeks.

“It is quite alright, Jenna. I was just about to leave” I say and am about to leave when I realize I never answered Mika’s remark.

I look back at her and once again take her form as she stands still holding her arm and looking away from us. The blush still lingers on her cheeks; it makes my heart flutter.

“I shall go with you, my princess… To the end of the earth, if I have to”

She slowly moves her eyes to look back at me and rewards me with a soft and shy smile. I can feel my own cheeks grow hot looking upon her. I have no memory of ever blushing for a woman before.

“Thank you” She slightly mumbles and I bow to her in respect before I take my leave throwing some rushed good nights.

I escape to my own chambers down the corridor and close the door behind me. I desperately try to gather myself, but it feels as if all of me has turned to liquid, completely avoiding my grasp.

It eludes me how so much has changed in so little time.

Not only a few months ago, all I wanted was to take over this kingdom and kill the princess and the king along the way. That wish of mine seems to have vanished now that I have grown feelings for the princess herself. I know now the prophecy is true and I have lost half of my powers due to a pure of heart.

With the barrier fading, it is only a matter of time before I lose everything I have ever tried to accomplish. However, that is not what haunts me now. No, my thoughts of power and conquer are nearly gone. What really bothers me now is my inability to protect Mika.

Once my powers are gone, and the barrier fades, this kingdom is sure to be swarmed by evil intended wizards and witches driven by the same prophecy of greatness which lured me here. Once that time of terror comes, I will not be able to protect her. She will be taken by their evil intentions and surely, I will be killed if I ever try to stand in their way.

Nevertheless, I still have hope. The prophecy speaks of greatness beyond belief, though no one truly knows how to achieve it. Recently, I have been searching through every book in this kingdom, hoping to find an answer, only to come back short.

Only a few of the books in this kingdom speak of the prophecy, and the ones which do speak of it don’t mention how to obtain power. They are simple statements of wizards and witches in the same situation as I, who lost their powers trying to approach the pure hearted one. It does not calm my nerves when nearly all of them have met their ending shortly after.

One book has called my attention, as it holds many detailed information about the curse. However, the pages which led to the discovery of the greatest powers have been ripped away. Surely someone in the village must have read this book and ripped those pages away to keep any wizard or witch to obtain the powers described. That was one of the books I found on the village’s small library.

My situation is a dire one. I see no escape from any of this. The only plan which seems reasonable in the least is to leave the castle now with little powers I have and flee back to my father’s castle.

I cringe at the mere thought. Despite it being a solution, I will never consider it. First, because I could never leave Mika alone now that I have come to care for her. Second, because the very thought of returning to my father for aid makes me sick to the stomach.

I push my glum thoughts away and focus on the matter at hand. Tomorrow, we will leave the safety of the castle to seek out the rogue army camping at our door. There are so many things that could go wrong.